In a huge dilemma, please advice.

I essentially have the same dilemma, i didn't really feel i'd find a person like me, in that they're in a relationship now yet they can't have O. Between me and my partner, we agreed to not meet now until we trust ourselves enough to be good (Alhamdulillah for lockdown anyways so we couldn't even if we wanted) and focus on deen with each other. Sometimes that really works, sometimes it doesn't. It's also difficult because you come to think about it and for me, before meeting my partner I was a much worse person, PMO-ing over much worse things. These are hard times for us all, but I'll keep you in my duas inshaAllah, that Allah grants you ease.

 

Hi @ELITE2BE
This is heavy question. Every men thinking seriously about his purpose and experiencing the power of semen have to answer this question. One day I will have to answer this heavy question for myself.

The only way is to learn how to perform sexually without losing semen.
Taoist/tantric practices have this kind of knowledge because sexual activity without losing semen wasn't something unnatural in previous days. Our nowadays way of lovemaking is rather disordered.
Seek help in tantra.

Some of techiques are kinda based on breathing techniques and keeping awareness to stop or squeeze muscles before reaching the 'point of no return' plus a lot more that I don't remember. Try looking for '1 million dollar point' technique.

Knowledge for healthy sex has been there for thousands of years, we just have to relearn and rediscover it.
Try lookig for Mantak Chia book 'Cultivating male sexual energy' or other tantric/taoist practies.

I read but I didn't had space to practice.

Good luck !

 

If she is okay with you not giving 100% then be it but if she is not okay with it then in my opinion you should go for normal mode i.e no P and no M but O is okay.
Don't loose her because of hard mode. Have equilibrium.
The rest is your decision to make.