Hello it is me again from the post of the edgings I just wanna let you know that I didn't watch porn 3 days after that edgings first. Now to the point. I have sometimes headaches since the edgings but the headaches was so much time before that. The brain fog disappeared completely thank to meditation and reading books.about the headache if I would want to get rid of it would Instagram be a better tool than porn to relapse to because I heard that Instagram is a softcore porn. I will never want to relapse and I persist on it but I am curious about what is worse Instagram or porn and how far it takes you in your recovery.
Well Porn is definitely more naughty, obviously. I'd rather specify the goal to "not using images or videos to masturbate" than to say "no porn, but i'll jerk off with instagram". Then you don't have to ask yourself what is worse.
Instagram itself can be okay to use, I think you just need to set yourself up for success if you choose to use it. Don't follow anyone that posts things that would trigger PMO, such as models or anyone you know that posts somewhat revealing photos / videos. Avoid the "Discover" tab at all costs, because more often than not, there are scantily clad models or workout videos in which the camera puts focus on the sexualization of their act. Instagram itself is not a softcore porn platform, but it can be if you don't make a point to avoid those things. Many people choose to avoid instagram altogether, but if you can muster enough will-power and define your limits, I think Instagram is okay to use. Regarding whether or not porn or instagram is better or worse, whichever would cause you to fail your NoFap journey would likely be cause for concern. I think you would know this answer better than us
I trigger myself everyday. Not to test myself, but because it's fun. A sexy picture here, naughty picture over there. There are some sweet cosplayers on Instagram! But the thought of playing with myself doesn't even cross my mind. Because I stopped playing that stupid pretend game where I make myself believe that I'm "suddenly mad with lust" and "just can't help myself". The reality is you either do it or leave it. Triggers can't remove our free will. No, you relapsed because you chose to. Take responsibility for your actions and freedom is yours!
Either you act like you have free will and make choices or you pretend you don't. As long as you search the fault for your relapse in anything but your choice, you'll always be in danger of falling. Sorry if it sounds harsh, I don't mean to criticize you. But take it from someone who has tried to quit for over two years, my longest streak used to be 17 days and everyday was a struggle because I was susceptible to triggers just like you. But I realized that relapsing because of triggers/lust/depression/high is a lie we tell ourselves to not have to take ownership of our actions. Stop putting porn on that powerful pedestal inside your mind, become bored and annoyed with it and your old you, decide to stop and stick with it, and quitting becomes easy, believe me. Triggers can only taunt you, they can't change your mind. Unless you secretly want them to.
After a long time, I can say that because I have some marketing work to do on Instagram and always relapsed from Instagram (I have strong feet fetish) I spent a long time of deleting inappropriate accounts with women. Now Instagram finally understood what I don't want to see so it is not showing me any weird things anymore. The work was worth. And still, if I catch something weird I delete it straight away. Watching anything that can trigger you throughout your journey is bad if you want to stay long streak and rewire the brain a bit. I see women feet the same way as "between her legs" as it makes me horny the same way, so I must avoid it. You know what makes you horny so why to hurt your journey?
I don't actively avoid triggers to not become subconsciously afraid of them. To stay in touch with the reality non-addicts experience. I want to live now like I want to live the rest of my life. And I want to be able to look at sexy images without immediately feeling complied to masturbate. Disassociating images and videos with orgasm. Turn it back into what it used to be, simple entertainment. Works like a charm for me. I'm not recommending people trigger themselves. However I am suggesting that the reason for relapses isn't found in triggers, it's in your mind.
Unfortunately, you need more life experience to find out where you are wrong. To look at sexy images and videos you are always opening your mind to the devil energy. Maybe you will develop consistency of not connecting this "sick entertainment" with masturbation anymore but generally, in your life, you will be turning in circles of self-loathing thoughts not knowing why. Your life vibration will be wrong. Evil entities will enter you while watching this "entertainment" and they are not bringing happiness and real joy into anybody's life. Only the (God, Universe, Higher energy) is bringing this happiness. Porn and anything connected to it is not coming from this higher energy. Feel free to find out by yourself in your life. Take as many years of your life as you need to figure this out
I think this thread touches on the topic of P substitutes. It is something that scares me personally as I have used P-Subs to MO. I was very disturbed last evening and felt helpless when a thumbnail suggestion on YouTube made me feel vulnerable. I felt scared that a small thumbnail could trigger an urge in me to PMO or P-SubMO. Got to rewire! I would strongly recommend getting off these sites if possible for you. I'm not sure if a full recovery is possible without leaving P-Subs but then YMMV. And that is the beauty of this process. Everyone has their own experiences and what works for you may not work for the next person. Good luck bud!
I do believe that evil exists. But I don't think hot women are evil. Nor do I think that photos or videos are evil. So porn isn't evil either. Even tho there is some humiliating porn out there which I would call evil, but I was never into that stuff in the first place. I think if you conceptualize porn as evil you make it more powerful than it is. The more power you give to porn in your mind, the easier it is to make you doubt your decision to quit. You start to think that you don't have a choice because porn is too powerful. I've been there, it's a useless way of thinking. Also I don't turn in circles of self-loathing thoughts my friend, you don't know me, don't make too many assumptions. But I know you mean well, so it's cool. I know I'm on the right path and I'll keep walking.
