My gym partner is a women and I want to ask her out....

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Sufc101, Feb 20, 2019.

  1. Sufc101

    Sufc101 Fapstronaut

    So I've started training with a women who I really want to ask out and get close to.... I've had a few times where this women has left the door open for me to ask her out.....
    All my worries and fears about my pied stopping me from doing so, tho I know Im good when I'm on medication..... would it be silly of me venturing in to this since I've relapses not so long ago? .... and of cause the stresses dating a women while I'm fighting pied will bring? I haven't had sex since August so I don't know how little man will react lol.. it's bit hard telling how it will react because I suffer maintaining a hard on than actually getting one.
    But I do so want to ask her out.
  2. SpoonDog

    SpoonDog Fapstronaut

    Just go for it, life is too short not to. Just take it a date at a time, just because you're dating someone doesn't mean you have to jump into bed with them. Enjoy spending time with her and getting to know her. Worry about the sexual side if and when that happens.
  3. Sufc101

    Sufc101 Fapstronaut

    The pressures of dating, the sexual side inevitably will come up and I don't know if I need the stresses of combating this. Tho this is me running away.
  4. JUST ASK HER OUT its that simple, you have feelings don't be ashamed of them
  5. justafriend

    justafriend Fapstronaut

    How much does it suck that today’s dating scene involves thinking of sex on (or even before?!) the first date? If you can, try to think “old-fashioned dating.” Get back to basic courtship. Have a conversation. Hold her damn hand.
  6. justafriend

    justafriend Fapstronaut

    And YES ask her out. And try to behave like a gentleman. You could even say directly, “Any chance we could try old-fashioned dating a while? You know, for the novelty of it?” Sheesh, I’d venture that would make a decent number of today’s females (my friends and I) swoon. Like, is that even a choice anymore???
    Last edited: Feb 20, 2019
    fiddler likes this.
  7. justafriend

    justafriend Fapstronaut

    You Can Do It.

    Think “gentleman.” Think “chivalry.”
    FX-05 likes this.
  8. 4DCreator

    4DCreator Fapstronaut

    Ask her out, and if it comes to sex tell her before that you had a problem with ED but you fighting against it. It will show confidence, and she will try harder to make you hard. Women love confidence. If you are confident about you insecurities there is nothing better.
  9. Sufc101

    Sufc101 Fapstronaut

    justafriend- I understand where you're coming from and I try my up most to act gentlemanly like..... This last month I've been getting to know her has been an upmost delight, going out for dinner with her, pushing each other in the gym and just conversing with her has been amazing.. Not all that experience dating myself... but I'll try and keep far from my mind

    4DCreator, I am thinking of being totally upfront, if necessary.

    Guys and Gal... I am going to ask her out .... Cleanliving I'm going for it.
    justafriend and CH3RRY like this.
  10. That's awesome GO FOR IT !
    boichy likes this.
  11. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

    All your stress / worries / fears are a result of being self centered. You want to wait until you're ready. Until things are ideal and smooth. You want to escape from real women / real relationships / real experiences / reality. Porn is a way to escape all that and focus solely on your needs / desires. All this escapism is a way for you to protect yourself from possible negative experiences.

    Where's the other person in all this? What about what she wants? What about her choice? What about her needs / desires? You're rejecting yourself before she even gets the chance to reject or accept you because this way you're maintaining a sense of control. This way you don't win, but you also don't really lose. Nothing happens. No chance for positive or negative experiences to happen. That's why porn felt so good (you get a positive experience without the risk of any negative experiences happening). If you want something real in your life, then you'll have to take a risk. You'll have to allow both positive and negative possibilities. That means letting others into your life. That means expanding beyond yourself and thinking about others.

    So if you want to get better at relationships, remember that it's not always about you.
    CH3RRY, Sufc101, justafriend and 2 others like this.
  12. UpTo45

    UpTo45 Fapstronaut

    Man the whole point of NoFap is to get control of your life, don't let NoFap control your life. Go for this girl, and if eventually you two end up in bed and eventually you have problems getting it up or lasting more than 1min, who cares? In the internet and when you talk to your friends everyone is some sort of pornstar that lasts hours, in reality people are just people.

    If this girl is any good she will not have a problem with pied, if she has a problem, she is just a worthless, and you can add her up to your trophy list.
    justafriend likes this.
  13. Sufc101

    Sufc101 Fapstronaut

    Your words ring very true.
    The words hurt.
    justafriend likes this.
  14. you can ask her out, but know that if she says no it might make her uncomfortable working out with you, its silly and sucks but it does happen.
  15. Sufc101

    Sufc101 Fapstronaut

    Mate I was thinking this the other day.
    And at the moment I'm just enjoying hanging out and enjoying this women company. I'm happy with the friendship and don't want to risk it. If romance happens then great but getting to know her in a friends Capacity is just as rewarding.
    justafriend likes this.
  16. the way i view it is if it is meant to happen it will happen, everyone has a purpose and destiny i believe, and i think if you spend a lot of time with her, the bond you share will grow stronger and eventually it might be able to turn into something else. Just remember this, always be kind to her, never not be yourself, dont be a douche, dont be awkward, always be there for her but not in a clingy or over baring way, the best way to be with her and view her is just as a friend nothing more, and that is when a real friendship will bloom and possibly turn into something.
    justafriend and Sufc101 like this.
  17. Are you really happy with just a friendship? Be honest
  18. Ask her out to lunch or something, wamen like food
  19. AncestralWarrior

    AncestralWarrior Fapstronaut

    Ask her out bro! Take a haul of bread and cheese and sit down in front of the lake or in a park and talk the day away.
  20. i agree you can ask her about but i would really advice waiting a couple months until your friendship has grown.

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