Rejected, but then suddenly... Unexpected success story

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by LilD, May 31, 2018.

  1. LilD

    LilD Fapstronaut

    I had a 33 days streak. During that time, I realized I like a girl, let's call her Alice. I say "realized" because I only started to actually see the women around me after I started rebooting. The more I saw her the more I liked her, the more I was thinking about her, and then I was in love.

    I asked her out on a date, but she rejected me very politely. I asked why, and from what she said I understood that she didn't want any relationships. That broke my heart, my life got really messed up, I relapsed and returned to my regular porn use, but continued visiting this forum.

    I also started going to a gym back then and trying to live a healthier life, which I continue to do. I decided that despite her rejection, I will make myself a better man.

    Months passed, I stalked her online a bit, had been seeing her when we met with our common friends, but eventually, we went separate ways. I tried to forget about her, but that didn't work. I ended up following one of her social network profiles. I thought it was still better than stalking stealthily. (And it is!)

    One day I found an excuse to send her a message and after that, I was founding such excuses more and more often until we started chatting regularly for a week or so. I thought that at least we are online friends now, but I lost all hope of dating her. I thought I was in her friendzone, deep and dark.

    Until one day she asked me if I wanted to go drink some coffee together! Of course, I agreed. The date was great. I haven't even done/said anything stupid. I was too shy to touch her even slightly, but she was comfortable around me and touched my arms multiple times.

    We talked a lot about ourselves, and I've told her that I haven't had a girlfriend since I was in high school, and I think at this point she realized that I'm a virgin, but I haven't said that directly. I shared some of my secrets, told her about NoFap and my mental issues. She told me that she rejected me because she had a BF at that time, I just misunderstood her then.

    There's going to be a second date, and I'm pretty sure she likes me. Maybe not as much as I like her, but still. Not sure where this is going yet, but the more I know her, the more I love her. I haven't confessed yet because I don't want to scare her.

    But let me tell you what I've learned: Never give up! I'm so happy my feelings forced me to stay in contact with her even though we haven't had any chances to meet IRL again. (Well, there's always a chance, but it was not bigger than random.) We had no other means of contacting each other, so if I chose to forget about her, we wouldn't meet again.
     
  2. Julius93

    Julius93 Fapstronaut

    "You haven't even done/said anything stupid." haha
     
    Last edited: Jun 1, 2018
  3. TC10

    TC10 Fapstronaut

    415
    623
    93
    Well done my man. Thanks for sharing. Sometimes you just need such inspiration. This puts a smile upon my face :)
     
    LilD likes this.
  4. kilometrico

    kilometrico Fapstronaut

    40
    30
    18
  5. kilometrico

    kilometrico Fapstronaut

    40
    30
    18
    congratulation bro, that went well.
     
    LilD likes this.
  6. LilD

    LilD Fapstronaut

    Today's date was great. I asked if I could hold her hand and she said yes. Looking into her eyes feels so great.
     
    DIYAS1, HipPete, newlife1975 and 3 others like this.
  7. MetaGame

    MetaGame Fapstronaut

    214
    179
    43
    Cute. Ya a lot of nofappers dont understand the difference between a no,not right now and rejection. I think its cuz they expect or fear failure.
     
  8. LilD

    LilD Fapstronaut

    @Shinsoo, I think it's really hard to distinguish when there are no other signs she likes you. I was sure she didn't hate me because we were talking like friends, but that made me think that the friendship is all I can hope for. She hasn't explained anything, so I thought she simply didn't see me as a potential romantic partner.
     
    TC10 likes this.
  9. TC10

    TC10 Fapstronaut

    415
    623
    93
    Does this help you with NoFap? Is it easier for you now you've got someone to care for?
     
  10. LilD

    LilD Fapstronaut

    @TC10, so far, yes. First, I have less time to have urges. Second, when I have urges, I remember that now I have a girlfriend. Fewer excuses, more motivation.
     
    DIYAS1 and TC10 like this.
  11. LilD

    LilD Fapstronaut

    Today was our first kiss. I was nervous, she seemed to be nervous too, but it was absolutely great. Best day of my life.
     
    DIYAS1, jaack86, HipPete and 4 others like this.
  12. Theultimatefighter_21

    Theultimatefighter_21 Fapstronaut

    146
    149
    43
    It's really a great history, and gave me some courage.
     
    LilD and TC10 like this.
  13. Ambrose Grant

    Ambrose Grant Fapstronaut

    83
    2,093
    113
    Hi, any updates?
     
    TC10 likes this.
  14. LilD

    LilD Fapstronaut

    Ambrose Grant likes this.
  15. Pink Zeppelin

    Pink Zeppelin Fapstronaut

    7
    9
    3
    These kind of experiences motivates me, i hope everything goes well.
     
    LilD likes this.
  16. Tokenator27

    Tokenator27 Fapstronaut

    72
    48
    18
    I'm "dating" a woman for the first time in 10 years so I can understand your uneasiness and what I imagine are a constant wave of "what if...?" Style thoughts. Best thing you can do is not be afraid to fuck up, not be afraid of doing or saying the wrong thing. The more comfortable you can make yourself moving forward in the relationship, the more successful it will be and the better you will feel about it, and yourself, in the process.

    Good luck to the both of us buddy.
     
    Hitto, LilD and Ambrose Grant like this.

Share This Page