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"relapsed" at 30 days - a must read on the mind

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by numpty, Oct 3, 2015.

  1. Oct 3, 2015 #1
    numpty

    numpty Fapstronaut

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    So yes I scraped to 30 days today with struggles ie started M / edge then i realise it is wrong and stopped so I achieved no O for 30 days...at the very least.


    Anyhoo this morning I have dream that I bought a house and this girl gives me a bj... and am like "oh fuck 30 days gone down the drain"!

    I wake up and think have i really relapsed - part of the brain is like yes other part is like no there's nothing wet down there!

    This is the second time in a month where I had a dream and thought i relapsed and the mind is trying to push me in wakefulness to believe the dream to be fucking correct!

    Don't let the mind fuck with you people - you fuck the mind!

    No I didn't relapse! :) fuck you corrupt mind!

    Thing is folks when you push your mind it gets desperate and tries to create hallucinations to fool you or to revert you! This has been the case with me as i blocked materials that fuelled it but mind worked its way around google and found some fuel sources but now my mind is not responding as much as it did to similar fuel sources
     
    numpty, Oct 3, 2015
    numpty, Oct 3, 2015
    #1
  2. Oct 3, 2015 #2
    iwillgrowstrong

    iwillgrowstrong Fapstronaut

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    Yeah sometimes my mind brings naughty fantasies too. It gets tough to resist as it's technically no porn on the screen, and I'm like "ok, I can MO to that..." but it's the mind working its way around. I think it's better to go hard mode and only O during actual sex.
     
    iwillgrowstrong, Oct 3, 2015
    iwillgrowstrong, Oct 3, 2015
    #2
    Spidey2Dope and numpty like this.
  3. Oct 3, 2015 #3
    Musta

    Musta Fapstronaut

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    loll that was a nice post. However, I've been experiencing the same thing. twice this week I have thought that I have really relapsed while I didn't :). It actually feels good to know that you could have relapsed but you didn't. And you're right about the desperate mind thing...
     
    Musta, Oct 3, 2015
    Musta, Oct 3, 2015
    #3
  4. Oct 3, 2015 #4
    Spidey2Dope

    Spidey2Dope Fapstronaut

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    Yes I agree. When OP said about his dream about the girl giving him BJ and said he relapsed I was like noooo. If it's with an actual girl I believe it doesn't count. An O with a girl is a win to me. That's all that matters IMO. It believe it's only bad when it's just me, myself and I.
     
    Spidey2Dope, Oct 3, 2015
    Spidey2Dope, Oct 3, 2015
    #4
    iwillgrowstrong likes this.
  5. Oct 3, 2015 #5
    Thechosenone

    Thechosenone Fapstronaut

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    Having these thoughts is your brains way to deal with these urges. It neutralises them in a dream - its a good healthy thing. It can't express it in real life so it clears it in dreams. I had a dream that I was MOing and I work up with a wet dream...I didn't MO in real life but it felt as if it was done and I didn't need it again...

    It's a positive
     
    Thechosenone, Oct 3, 2015
    Thechosenone, Oct 3, 2015
    #5
    numpty likes this.

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