Hi I relapsed after a couple of months, i got some wet dreams here and there, but i was absent from the gym a whole month because of fasting, and today was my first gym session i kinda got super horny when i saw opposite sex, came home and busted a nut hours after. I feel like a failure.
It's just a small setback, my friend. You have a couple months, which is awesome! Just get back on the wagon. Remember, you're a human being with sexuality built into your humanity. Arousal is going to happen. The goal isn't to never feel aroused, it's to learn how to relax and let the feeling run its course without having to resort to fapping. If someone had to punch a hole in a wall every single time they got angry, we would conclude they have an anger management problem. "Why does he need to destroy things? Why can't he just be angry?" PMO addicts are the same way. We just have an arousal management problem.
Thank you for reply, its just i feel like my progress is thrashed, i wasted my potential for nothing i hate the feeluing
Same thing happened to me. Reached 70 days and then relapsed. Felt like crap afterwards as getting to 70 was hard enough, and now I have to start from 0. Regardless, this is a process and you have to look at the positive. I've PMO'ed 3 times in 2024 (Jan 10, Feb 2, April 11). That's 3 more times than I wanted to obviously, but last year PMO'ed 22 times (have the dates for each day). Went from averaging twice a month last year to less than 1 a month this year. Have to look at the positive and build from that. We can do this. Maybe not cold turkey, there will be bad periods, but slowly bring it down and then eventually stop completely. That's the goal.
Stop beating yourself up! It happens to everyone. Get back on the bandwagon asap. Progress, not perfection, like @SuperFan says. Consider your progress.... have you made progress? But I know how shitty it feels to waste your life force energy and potential. But don't double up the shitty feelings with self punishment. Feeling drained and weak from dissipating your seed is enough pain for you to get the message to get your will for life back!
+1 good post. Also Ive heard "reset" is a good word for when you have a PMO slip up but youre still motivated to keep on nofap. A "relapse" is when you're like "fuck it i dont care anymore" and you completely fall off the wagon. Or at least thats what Ive read, and its a definition that works for me because then I dont beat myself up so hard for messing up.
That's the first I have heard on the difference between relapse and reset. Very good to know! Yes, I have had to reset as well but I am not out of the fight, not even close to being discouraged. We can do it.
