Sexual arousal

I'm not complicating simple things. Things are complex, that's just a fact.

And I'd not say that I "expressed" my arousal somehow. I'm not sure how I shoudl "express" it. Maybe I could act on it, but even that wasn't the case.

I'm sorry if you are somehow upset by my explanations. I'm just sharing my experiences. If you do not relate to them, you are free to tell me, if you are not intrested in, you are free to ignore my descriptions. But if you do so, pleas try to do it in a productive manner, that sets my experiences in relation to yours and allows to gain further knowledge by comparance.

 

(Just quoted a part of your message, although I actually wanted to just do some @wilder9117 mention, but I don't know if and how such a thing works on this site)

Ok. So I think you are simplifying things a little. Of course (quite probably) brain is involved somehow.(Ok, actually in this case I'm really not sure, as movement of the legs soeems to reduce arousal, so this could also be a somehow local biological effect without brain being involved. But now assume brain is involved).
If brain is involved, this assumtion, that somehow arousal is priorizised is one, that should be furteh investigated. In the last weeks I haven't had much work to do.
But till now, it does not seem like other things needing attention would reduce arousal in any way. Also not interesting things or whatever. But I'm not sure aboutthat, maybe all that things didn't really distract enough. Ans also it's complicated to notice, wheather I'm aroused while being distracted, so that might be not easily measured.

What I can say is, that much stress(distress) does not reduce arousal. I experienced that a few days agp, had to listen to several lectures at once, but technical problems occured and I got to do a lot of things at the same time. Arousal did not dereas, it's more like the opposite happend.

But I haven't yet further investigated that.

Yeah, thanks for that. You are definitly helping as you remind me to keep track of that. Also, maybe I'm somehow searching for a easy solution, that does not include distraction or such or at least trying to understand, why I have this mostly permanent arousal, as it does not seem to be normal. I mean, distraction is nearly always a solution, as long it's accomplished.

By the way: If you say "earlier", how long did that last, when did that start?

 

I've never watched porn ;-) But I know what you're reffering to.

Well, it's not distracting all the time I guess. But I'm not sure. A little bit difficult probably to compare, as I got ADHD and got medicamentation for it, so dis might get into play when talking about attention, distraction, ...

Also arousal might be connected to this somehow, I'm not sure how Dopamine does act in this context.

I started masturbation quite early I guess. I don't know when I started to do it nearly all the time. But I stopped on 20th Feburary od this year and then arousal began to become noticeable (or I began to notice it? Not sure).

 

I guess I was satisfied with reading fetish stories, watching real world people or people from movies/series and having my own phantasie/imagination.

Yeah, I'm not sure if this is somehow gonna help. I mean I'm already doing some kind of meditation, definitly better than trying to do that based on some manual from the internet or something.

I'll do. Or I already did? Or I tried to but it didn't work? Well, I don't know.

 

Well, terminology says that's something to do with "libido", what's something I'm not sure about what exactly it describes.
I'd say my thoughts about sexual phantasies, masturbation and such did vary, but now I'm more conscious to them and also trying to supress them. Not sure, if that does change anything and not sure, why I'm doing, but ther's no reason why I shouldn't give it a try.

What I think I experienced were some days, when I had strange thoughts about maybe even sexlike activities maybe without even experiencing physical arousal in a way I experiencing it usual. But I'm not sure if that's something new or just variation of other things, that just now look special because I'm first noticing them.

That's something I also already thought about. I'm actually not sure if my orgasm-like ejaculation I had at begin of this month somehow resetted anything. Anyway it seems like I've collected further knowledge, that helps me, to better interprete my situation and measure changes, so if it resetted, it's different anyway. But due to it I'll have to wait longer to see, if my arousal problem somehow disappears.

 

I'm not sure about what you mean by that, so I can't tell you if can I relate.

What I know about myself ist, that sometimes I consider certain thinks as "attractive" (since lately even parts of my own body, what's somehow interesting). But actually I don't really want such things to interfere my mind. But sometimes I don't really notice "attractive" things, then it's more like I can decide to consider something "aesthetical" and the I find a way to do so. (Also even when those "attractive" things interfere my mind, I think I'm quite good at finding beauty in everything if I want to. But at such moments the fact, that I want to avoid those things, that are considered "attractive" in a some kind of deeper (sexual?) way, keeps me away from some of that thoughts as I don't want to risk to lose myself to it.)

 

Unfortunatly I'm not able to express many kind of creative thoughts, so my creativity is only visible in some places or somehow indirectly.
I can see pictures infornt of my mental eye, listen to music in my mind, think about stories, but all that won't ever leve my mind in that quality I imagined it.

I'm not sure about what you mean by "growth". Also this question might be hard to answer. I'm not ejaculating often since I stopped masturbating. And if I do, then my feelings about it depend on the situation when it happend. Like when it happend while I had fetish thoughts, it feels bad. When it happens, just like that, it feels good. hen it happens due to me being stressed it somehow feels a little bit bad, but I don't really have time to think about it at the moment it happens as I'm stressed, so...

Somedays it feels, like I'm ejaculating, but actually nothing happens, that's somehow annoying.

 

Also an interesting thing:

Sometimes when sleeping it feels like I'm waking up for a very short moment having the notion of me either masturbating or ejaculating (or at least pulsation without ejaculation). I'm not sure if that's just a dream, but I know that there are sleeping disorders including doing such things and I know I have another sleeping disorder sometimes.
It would be really interesting to know wheather this is just a dream or really happening.

 

I'm not sure if I got some extra energy. It's more like my personality changed in many ways (not sure if that#s due to stopping masturbation or due to other reasons). Instead of programming all the time, I'm spending more time on reading comics, writing posts in online forums, doing researches about various stuff, sometimes even doing some sports.

Difficult. I'm trying to avoid arousing thoughts. But I cannot avoid them fully or proactive. If I'm not recognizing fast enough, what I'm thinking, longings might get stronger, I'm not sure if there is a border, which, when I cross it, won't leave a way back for me.

Even though I'm actively avoiding arousing thoughts, I might look at arousing things for a short time. (Or also at things that are in another way attractive.)

Touching my dick is not a major problem. I'm only doing so for reasons like urination, cleaning or whatever. But than longer I touch it, of cousre, than harder it gets, what than is a little bit annoying.

But their are no conscious actions doing any sort of stimulation of my dick while being awake. (Except that time a couple of weeks ago, where I made an experience while not being aroused, wanting to figure out, of tension of genital muscles has an influence of masturbation.)