Spider Porn? - Day 3

2:16 am - Saturday 9th January - Day 3

(I'm writing for the 8th of January. My sleeping schedule is messed up and that's why I'm writing these logs so late. I've got to fix my sleeping schedule before school starts. Ugh.)

I've been busy today as well, helping around the house and going out to eat with my family. The only thing that happened today concerning PMO is that I was watching Shane Dawson's recently uploaded video about him reacting to "spider porn". "Spider porn" seems to be this stupid porn video of a person dressed up as a disgusting spider having sex with a man. How do I know this? I saw Pewdiepie reacting to it a couple of days ago. But the second time I saw a person reacting to it, which was Shane Dawson, I just got a little curious of what the spider in the video actually looked like. I wasn't curious about the porn in the video. I was curious about how disgusting the spider looked like and how messed up the video was (because sometimes we're all curious about messed up things. Ask the people who looked up 2 girls 1 cup. It's that kind of "curious" I mean). So I searched "spider porn" in Google Images and I saw the spider. Yes, it was disgusting looking. And as curious of a person I am, I kept scrolling down to see more of the disgusting spider. But there was other images of other kinds of porn too. That's when I realized I had to click away the Incognito window (I used the Incognito window because I didn't want the search "spider porn" in my browser history), and so I did. I deleted the Incognito window and forgot what I had just seen. That's all that had happened today concerning PMO. Otherwise there hasn't been any other type of incident concerning PMO. Day 3 completed!

/ Ilfaal

 

I believe internet can change you. How can it not change us, how we act, what we do, how we do it? Everyone with the accessibility to computers, smartphones and tablets are hooked on them. Everyone's on the internet exactly all the time. In that way, the internet has an affect on us. I know it affected me. I'm a porn addict with the help of modern internet. I would've never been one if it weren't for the internet. It has changed me. But I'm here now to change that, to be in control of my addiction. I'm glad too that I got away from it and closed that Incognito window. After all, this is only my third day. I'm going at this hard and with all I've got. I'm planning on having that mindset throughout my entire reboot. And thanks.