Welcome to hell

Hey man, I understand your situation, I'm almost a year into nofap already, and now just only on a 7 day streak...
What happened to me sometimes, when a relapse happened (or rather.. when I chose to relapse).. after a relapse, I became careless, binged out on it... thoughts like.. what does it matter, I already messsed up, so now it doesnt matter much..
However ofc this is a dangerous trap. After a relapse its so inportant to try to regain direction and also to learn from every relapse, why it happened, what triggered it, what were the thoughts etc.
But yeah, I'm happy I havent relapsed the past 7 days, however there were some intense moments... but I know I would feel like total crap afterwards, and to be frank I think it may be good to feel so bad after a relapse, that means you are taking it seriously and dont want it to happen again. Have a good day !

 

Get a grip on your self soldier, this is war!!!!!!

If you don't destroy the enemy he will destroy you.

Is five seconds of sleazy pleasure worth breaking your streak over?

Being a man is about struggle, suffering and sacrifice, that's how you earn being a big man.

Enjoy the pain, it means your alive, there is a battle in your soul and u must win!

 

Write those thoughts out, post it as a note or have it easily accessible on your desktop so that next time you're slipping you can pull it up and read it through, even outloud. I've started keeping journals myself, not just about urges but big decisions as well...I recently broke up with my girlfriend of almost 3 years (mutual decision, both knew it was wise), and I wrote down my thoughts at the time that led to that decision, so that now if I'm feeling doubtful I can go back and remind myself why I did it. You have the most clarity immediately after the tumultuous event, and reading your OWN words and thought process can be extremely powerful. It will remind yourself of ALL the reasons why you're trying to abstain, and how foolish and simply not worth it it would be to give in to a couple minutes of dirty pleasure. This is such an awesome platform, and sharing these thoughts with each other is an amazing tool as well!

Wishing you strength, power will and determination my friend! Hope this suggestion helps out

 

ah thats not a good thing man :/ i hope you can get back on track. can you get some professional help or just the help of some AP partner or a good friend you can talk with? can you stay with someone for a few days so you won´t go back to PMO?

 

I'm sorry to hear, man! An accountability partner would be a good idea as mentioned in the previous comment someone in real life would be ideal, a trusted friend or partner perhaps, but someone who doesn't make you feel shameful about it. My ex-gf was mine and I ended up lying cause it made me feel so awful to be tell her when I slipped up.
And try as much as possible to make it a habit coming on here at least once a day. This is such an awesome community, where people are experiencing the same things; so instead of cliche comments like "we fall to learn to pick ourselves up" etc., you can find good strategies to keep on track. Maybe put a reminder in your phone or something. I think I will, I've started coming on less and less, and I've been coming closer and closer to slipping up. I really hope it does get easier as we go on.....
From your posts it's seems like you're really genuine, and recognize that your lusts aren't a part of your best self, and you legitimately want to change for the better which is a huge step. I'd suggest keeping track of all your triggers, and designing strategies to avoid them, even planning out your days to avoid too much time alone at home/in your room. Essentially you want to find something that is a powerful intrinsic motivator, the driving reason for why you want to kick this addiction, and use that as a weapon against urges.
Please keep us posted on this thread, with good or bad news! We're all here for each other.

 

Lol, now that's an excuse I hadn't heard yet. I can definitely sympathize though. Thinking that the streak isn't long enough, so what's another relapse. It's not like it will hurt....yeah right! I've made that mistake before.

 

Yeah it's all about rediscovering a healthy sexuality...that's what I've been thinking of a lot lately; what exactly does it look like? Porn distorts it, but that doesn't mean all sexual thoughts are bad, like you said about fantasizing, or looking forward to sex, I'd say that's healthy as long as it's in moderation. Especially at your age it'll be extremely important to rediscover healthy sexuality (or just discover for the first time?). And if you ever do find yourself slipping try and at least steer clear of your fetish, if you can avoid that, you may be able to teach yourself to not become submissive to your lusts/urges. And what you said about reasoning/guilt is so true. I think there's a point of no return, where even though you're not MOing immediately, you've made up your mind that you're going to ASAP. Maybe try to nip it earlier in the bud if you can. I know that's easier said than done haha

 

going down is not a problem as long as you get back up again. i also feel hypocritical when i gave advice on how not to relapse and then i relapse myself. we don´t need to be so hard on yourself. keep going son =)