What If?

I do a lot to keep my mind off everything such as Movies and Gaming. But after 8 days which was my longest, before it was 5, I couldn't keep it in. And the stress and everything of having to keep it in for 8 days was finally relieved. But "What If" that's my last time, I think my anti-depressants help me from doing anything either that's why I never hit the "Reset" button on my App and I'm about to reach 9 days. Heck I may not even feel that way till day 17 or 23.