Addictions are very hard to break and the first step is always the hardest. Many people have accepted Porn as a part of their life or even see it as healthy and many of us would have felt that at one point in our lives. But eventually, we all realised the dangers of Porn and chose to give it up in hopes of a better life. Despite the struggles of recovery, we are all still committed to trying to break free from our addictions. I have always seen this first step as a "Catalyst" that would be the first push to start this recovery and if you change your views against Porn, there must have been a "Catalyst" that made you change for better. My question for you is, what was that "Catalyst" or first step that made you take this route. I'm curious because I want to see the different motives that people have for drastic change.
My Catalyst was developing a crush on someone and I began to believe that getting rid of Porn would be the first step in making me a better person. It was very good motivation initially but when the relationship failed, it would affect me long-term but was vital in educating me about my health and Porn addiction.
5 years of ED with my fiance' that started at age 33. I finally became almost impotent before hearing about P.IE.D
It's complicated... I grew up as an evangelical Christian and would go to youth meetings. In these meeting, they would talk about how sinful porn was, and anyone viewing it should repent. This was in the early 00s and NoFap didn't exist. At that time, I joined the now defunct XXXchurch's prayer board, which was sort of like the NoFap subreddit except a bit more religious. In my 30s I completely lost my faith and I went through a period where I thought porn was fine. My thinking was if Christianity wasn't true, then what they said about porn wasn't either, and my issue with porn was all down to my religious upbringing. The thing that completely changed my mind was reading Louise Perry's book The Case Against the Sexual Revolution. In it, she argues against using porn from an evolutionary and somewhat secular perspective, and that convinced me I need to stop looking at it. I have the liberal view that porn would be alright if misogyny wasn't a part of it and sexuality didn't get so dark, but that's not the case.
Like @onceaking , I grew up Christian and had the default assumption that porn was bad. Like @onceaking , I spent time very much disillusioned by Christianity, as she is practiced. I’m still on the fence about a lot of things, but currently attending church regularly. I was burnt out on religion and considering that porn addiction might just be part of who I am. I thought maybe asking me to not use it, in today’s environment, was an impractical, unreasonable request. Then I read an article about NoFap, a secular space that denounced porn, and claimed to have a proven way to genuinely defeat it. Turns out porn is still a difficult addiction to beat, and most people who try to get clean, whether using secular means or religious, don’t. Also, I went through like a four year period where I listened to the “experts” and didn’t fight the addiction. That probably set me back. But I’m eight years in and had some pretty good streaks in that time, so that’s good. And, thanks to some seismic life changes I didn’t expect or particularly want, this is looking like it has a better chance than ever to be my final streak. Huzzah. Unlike @onceaking , I don’t think porn could ever be good for people. I think it’s a twist on something good and natural, overemphasizing things about sexuality we like, while ignoring parts of it we need. I think it offers too much dopamine reward for too little effort, and instills unrealistic expectations in the consumer. That said, I still respect the former monarch as a peer, and an uncommonly helpful member of the community.
