The Lord of the Rings Challenge

475 days SR
46 days no sex

Friendship, no more girls & austerity

Girls:This fitness girl I dated two weeks ago texted me yesterday telling why I wasn't talking to her anymore, I didn't feel like replying, also she hasn't tried to talk to me too. I think I'll just let her go. I could easily have sex with her but there is something negative and heavy about her energy also she's coming too strong, that text yesterday was very uncalled for.

Yesterday I went to see the girl I'm dating at her house, it was good. I'm going to stay with this girl, we are almost like friends I never had that with a girl, she'll be my first female friend.

She only had sex once and I'm not certain if we are going to have sex soon, we have seen each other since two weeks ago. I don't really care about it, but at the same time this doesn't help to see her as a partner, at the moment I enjoy her company and talking to her.

Friendship is something I rarely experience maybe in my teenage years like 15 years ago. I'm pretty much a loner, except I date girls from time to time.
So I appreciate this girl's friendship even more than sex or an actual romantic relationship. Even do we kiss and all that but no sex. She also says, she doesn't want to rush things up because it has turned bad for her in the past. I haven't mention sex too, I told her that when she feels ready we'll do it. There's also some flaws in her character and inmaturity that doesn't help me to see her as something serious, maybe this can change, only time will tell.

Some exes have reached out to me these past days wanting to see me and have sex, I simply ignored them. It's so great to not be dependent on sex, nothing compels you or makes you dependable on someone else.

Free of lust = freedom

For the time being I'm going to take a complete break from girls probably until march/April next year I need to focus on my studies 110%. Maybe if a girl I like a lot comes in my way or if this girl I'm seeing right now we become serious I'll reconsider girls again in this period of time. I just don't want to spend any time or mental energy on girls right now. I have to study like crazy.

Austerities:
Day 1/30
I'm going to do some austerities this always helped me in the past to have more energy and a sharp mind.

1.I'll be out of the internet or any screen unless it's for studying and nofap posting but mostly on my journal, making threads and in the challenges. Also always open to help if someone pm me.

2.no girls except the girl I'm seeing or if another one I like a lot comes in the way.

3. Waking up at 4am or even earlier.
4. Not lying on my back in any seat.
5. Chaste look
6. No music

7. Simple food, no junk food or anything like it, maybe an ice cream or a pizza very rarely only if I'm on a date with a girl and most likely only after having sex, I don't really like junk food.

8. Cold showers

 

Hello everyone! Nice to see you all! It's been a while since I've posted, I know. I am still in vacation, so I say that it still counts as an excuse to not post but also, partying every night and sleeping in different dimensions every night, does have its toll, so some might understand the situation... But even that, is not an excuse to not post, because...
Excuses are, and will be forever...
As long as I use them, they will be used.
And thinking that excuses excuse excuses is never logical. It's the re-act that excuse excuses.
Anyway, as you can see, I'm handling these new found superpowers extremely "well". (The calibration seems like it's gonna be it's own set of challenges).
So the thing think is, I became quite disappointed in today and thought about just paying for some... You know, Being here, in my homecountry where it is cheap and the probability of knowing one, or having one close to your friend circle is quite high, doing such a thing is not such a rarity. And of course the thing I was mentioning that I wanted to pay for... Is the s E x.
I'm still not out of the woods yet, but Friday I return home, and things will start to re-settle down, theoretically.
But let me tell you, where the thought of paying came from. It came from not managing to score tonight .
Yeah, yeah! I know! Not the most important problem in the world right now (kabul, covid, lockdowns protests, my questionable use of substances that some don't know even exist, what gender everyone is and and how oppressed BLM founders feel as they buy their 5 million dollar houses with "racebaiting"money) but you know, as they say in journalism: "The dead man losses his value for every 100 meters/feet that he is further from the point of attention."
So, as I was heading home from the date that didn't wanted to spend the night with me after 2 dates. Sure... The first one was one week ago, and had to just drop her off home after our hike, of course, there was some curious kissing under the starlights in the middle of nowhere where there was barely any light pollution, soon after the blink of a shooting star. Had to drop her home, not because, not because our date went bad, but because the car I used to take us there, was the same car that had to take me and my friends to the sea in the next 30 minutes, for an 8 hour drive until reaching said sea.
So basically, I had a hiking tinder date (idea in case you were bored), and after hiking I had to take the car to a point at a certain hour and get out of the city.
Anyway, before returning back from the sea and back into the city, I had prolonged my stay in my homecountry, and when I arrived, I wrote to her if she's free and wants to try some going out again, and she said yes and we met again, this time in the middle of the city lights and unmasked people, just like in the old days.
The day went fine until the very end, at least, the moment I knew it was the very end. When her understandable reasons for not wanting to go further were spoken I had no other option but to stop the chase. In a way, further psychopathic lying approach would've probably worked, however, I'm do not enjoy lying, not since I found the thoughts of Sam Harris, or Jordan B Peterson about how lying works, or how I've noticed that it distorts reality and the future along with it, but yeah, I didn't take that approach, as let's be honest, I am staying 4 days here and go back to live in France write the best story I've seen, with it's creation time cap being 50 years (2071 AD) while working, living and thinking, creating and destroying, optimizing my universal flow and surviving it's tolls and also she doesn't seem like she needs another chip on her shoulder at 27.
So as I was going home I was thinking, Hey, might as well go to a sex worker/ red massage parlor and just do it and arrived home, and as those thoughts started to take a hold of me, I remembered that NoFap exists, and that I am on this forum, and how lucky I am to be able to go somewhere in these moments.
Anyway, my urge is now gone as it has been transmuted in the words above, so if someone managed to read it, thank you...and let me know if you like these kind of stories (real events of course).
Day 29 (by my calculations), Prophet Moonstruck going to bed!

 

Day 7

Here's to one week down, and one day from becoming Uruk-Hai!

Still trying to get my sh*t together, but I feel like I'm gaining more and better insight.

 

Day 4
This has been the easiest start to a streak I had so far. I´m busy and wasn't even tempted once up until now. Life is good!

 

Awesome friend

Well done on overcoming your urge and writing this post on the forums instead brother, truly well done!

To add to what was mentioned, I find that meditation first thing in the morning really helps set the pace for the day. Channel stress through both meditation and exercise. In time as your streaks get longer, you'll notice your resilience to stress increase. The whole reason we turned to PMO was to cope with stress, but that is a double edged sword, because over time we feel more stress from PMO and eventually what we've been running from hits us like a truck.

 

Checking in Fellowship!

Day 209 free of MO , Day 281 free of Porn.

Felt pretty good today too, I don't want to jinx it but I really do believe that I'm finally pulling out of this withdrawal.

 

I beat my highest record of 20 days !!!!
This is also the first time I completed 3 weeks in the past 3 years.

 

10
I wish I had more time, in fact I really wish I could pause my life, or I wouldn't age for next 5 years. What I could become at 33, I would be at 28.
All I know is I lack time.

 

You know, what wouod be more interesting? If you could share, what exactly you do post 1am of your scheduled wake up? And also why of that? I'm actually keen on that.

 

Amazing streak!
You’re inspiration

 

Yes I am heading towards the elves as we speak. Things are harder today, the pmo forces are at my heels but I won't stop moving.

 

5 days

 

394 days

 

Day 3 complete!

My excuse for not checking in consistently or reading up on the thread is that I started seminary at the beginning of this week, and it's been insanely busy. I've been getting about 5 hours of sleep a night, which is neither familiar nor comfortable; I'm hoping my body acclimates quickly. At any rate, being constantly kept on my feet (metaphorically) means that PMO has been nowhere on my radar. Please pray for me, guys! I love this ministry but it won't always be easy.

 

I wish you the best on this path brother

 

Gonna give this another go, finished my first day.

 

78 days.

Didn't get the best sleep so I was pretty low energy yesterday. On the flip side, not much urges to speak of so all was good.

 

DAY 18 WEDNESDAY.

 

Day 49 of Semen Retention / No PMO / NoFap (hard mode).

 

Fell and masturbated today, though without porn at least which is better than last time.

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