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Post published by SAL_VI
In need of prayer today. I realized for a long time, I struggle with anxiety when it comes to social situations. Particularly when I am in a large group, I can't help but feel...
-paralyzed
-inadequate
-rejected
-lonely
The worst part is when everyone in the group is talking amongst themselves in smaller groups, while I'm just standing there alone. It's moments like that where I just want to run away because I feel like I don't belong. Worse part is I feel that the most in church!! The place in which we are to be one, united in faith and fellowship, I can't help but feel that way. I also struggled with trust issues growing up, plus I'm an introvert. Perhaps PMO also plays a part as I hear how it's correlated with anxiety. Nevertheless, this is a stronghold. So please keep me in prayer and I would appreciate any input regarding the matter. I'm starting small groups today and I can't help but feel anxious. Even though I know people from church , I have yet to establish something with them who seemingly have that connection with others around me. I hate it.
ps- I usually get along with older people than those my age (young adults) as we have more meaningful convos. However, my church is like almost all young adults. I never was a fan of my generation. I find people immature, and lacking in manners, even in church.
Even if I hang with 1-2 ppl, I feel like the person I'm closet to is replacing me with the other person.
more_vert
70*7
You just described me and my life. I too struggle with the social bit at the end of church. I've been going to same church now for almost 30 years, but feel I Know people less today than years ago. Being introverted, I hate small talk. Maybe that's why I went into mental health work all those years ago. Give me someone who doesn't fit social norms and I'm fine...
more_vert
Tao Jones
This is just like PMO. It is always a lie. These feelings of inadequacy and rejection are a lie. Run those through the Spirit's truth filter and replace the lies with the Truth of who you are in Christ. You belong to him! You are embraced by him!
Then listen to the Spirit. How is he leading you? Does he have other plans for what community might look like for you? Maybe you can bring his light and warmth to members of an older generation somehow? Who knows what he might have in store for you? Ask, listen, and obey. This is how the grand adventure of life in Christ begins!
mrothell likes this.
more_vert
70*7
I think older people are generally less threatening, which is why I too can relate to them better. Will pray for you. Well done with the small groups thing. You have probably heard this a hundred times, but with anxiety, the only way out is through. Do the thing that scares you and keep doing it. What you avoid only becomes scarier.
more_vert
SAL_VI
Thank you guys so much. @Tao Jones I think you mean being a light to the young generation as that is the most challenging one to me. Either way, being light to all ppl of all ages! But you know what? I realize that ultimately, I’m responsible for my actions. Was I a light? Or did I keep it away?
more_vert
Soulherb
First, there are many who feel the same in traditional church. The church's current business model (called a worship model) does not do a good job of integrating those who do not fit the cookie-cutter mold. Whether that is your church or not, I cannot say, nor does that mean this new small group will be like that. My suggestion? Tell them about your struggles, right from the start. If that's hard, tell them that too. If they go the extra mile, you know you've found the right one. If not, you won't waste further time...