Hi today I complete 100 days from porn and masterbuation. This is really great gift I have with help of you people and my higher power I have very scared experience last night while I was doing work on my PC I was using youtube because I need some content from you tube in my work. My attention was clear there was no urge and craving for porn and masterbuation. But after 1 minute browse I saw in thumbnail one women video of yoga and excercise with very tight clothes. Without thinking I press that and video open i feel attracted to see her curvy body and feel arousel my hand automatic go to my P*** And I start rub After few second I change video and see more sexy women with sexuall content in same excercise stuff. And some body part was visivble. I don't know how my craving reach to peaks in seconds. My rubbing is continues with slow speed Then I change 3rd video the women I saw in this I really feel that I want that now. I want to make love with her. And I start rubing again fastly I really forgot about my recovery and my clean dates, and no fapping forum. But you people may be not trust, there is strange thing happen i listen a voice inside my brain ,or may be in my heart that say to me I am doing some thing wrong. Very fast I ask to my self what I am doing and why I am doing. I kept away my hand from my P**** And I pray to my higher power and ask give me courage to stop that nonsense I am doing. And I really feel fear to losing my recovery . I ask to my self that I don't want to ruined my recovery and my clean days I earn. Then I very fast shut down my PC And go to sleep. I took 4 or 5 minute to get normal I really really thanx to my higher power and you peolple and NoFap admin people because of them we are in recovery I wish we all enjoys our recovery and keep away ourselves from this YouTube and other websites. And please guide me I am found my self I am just abstain from P & M I am not in real recovery. I need that recovery where I don't need these kind of stuff in my life and specially watching other women's sexually I really want to get rid from these. Really thanx for listen
Wow, that must have been a terrible experience, I'm glad you could avoid the worst issue! I think you cannot struggle against some desires. Feeling attracted to someone is a natural thing that every men or women feel at one time or another. If that becomes a strong urge, you have to learn to control yourself. That was very ingenious from yourself to shut down your PC and go to sleep. I don't think it is something I can do for now. Do not hesitate to talk with someone or just look at other members' posts, they may be of very valuable advice. Today's the 8th, I am sure that both of us will overcome our problems!
Day 1/30 So far was easy, but at like 3 or 4 AM had an intense one, but managed to control it thankfully, wish me luck
Day 25/30 Re-read the guidelines of this challenge. It says "preferably everyday" so I'm actually five days away!
day 29 check in. i almost cracked...having a reliable person you can call helps...i went outside and literally jumped around for 15 minutes and the urge subsided
So Day 2/30 had an mass erection at like 6 AM. Thankfully there wasn't any semen released or a full ejaculation. But the clear fragile liquid that comes out when you provoke it Happened. Hopefully I can keep my streak up to 30 days wish me luck guys.