P.A.W.S. - what are they, cure, duration

Thank you brother!

 

I have had the "pleasure" of experiencing PAWS for the second time now so let me throw in my $0.02.

It's been said before but I'll say it again...there is absolutely no substitute for time and abstinence. People experiencing PAWS have a sickness in their brain, that sickness needs to be completely starved to death.

When going through alcohol PAWS I scoured the internet for advice, similar to how people here are doing now. It's good to have a resource for people to share their stories and to reassure each other that they are not going insane. The problem arises when people decide to show up and gaslight (you're trippin' this is all in your head) or give misguided advice (have you tried exercise, prayer, meditation, therapy).

This is simple stuff. Your addictive behavior is a sickness. That sickness needs to be completely extinguished.

Everything else on top of that, things like exercise and meditation, should complement the new life you are trying to build. In fact I would say they occur naturally for most people. When you stop doing a destructive habit for awhile you tend to realize there is more to this beautiful life than Taco Bell, World of Warcraft, and Instacuck.

Look at it this way...years from now if you continue on this path you will look back on these days as a badge of honor. Knowing you pushed through hell and got through to the other side.

 

I have gone so long not worrying about PAWS and i keep coming back because its the only thing that makes sense in my situation. Anhedonia and anxiety is very well reported with paws and can last 3 years. It happened to me as soon as i quit PMO. I was a heavy addict 6 times a day since before puberty. Bloodwork came back perfect.

 

was it sex or PMO which sent you back into PAWS after you had recovered? I’m trying to figure out whether I can have a normal sex life after all this.

 

I went through PAWS when I quit drinking as I was a severe alcoholic. Depression and suicidal thoughts continued for 20 months until it finally lifted.

Now I'm going through a milder PAWS related to sex/masturbation addiction. There was no way I was going to kick both habits together so I waited until I had some sober time before beginning semen retention.

 

The sex life worries me to, but im sure we will be fine as long as we don’t push our boundaries and keep us at vanilla sex

 

I'm a PAWS sufferer. Been at nofap since 2014, complet3d a lot of shorts streaks(10-30). longest one was in 2016(70 days) where a flatline ended. I felt so happy a that time and succumbed by an insane urge. Since then I kept fighting to us a decent streak. I was doing a lil better in 2017 after so me 30 days but I kept going back to pmo.

Then mid 2018, I was working at the time
But I was still struggling to go to work and missing some days. One day I went to porn to mo due to stress from the job. After 15 days, my brain switched then I lost cognitive function. I became impaired, unable to think, to stay standing for even 30 minutes. That's when I quit working for good.
I've completed 16mo hardmode. The pain I went through to reach this streak which I had to or die. The pain was so severe that I couldn't lay down on the bed without twisting....
I'm still in PAWS to this days. Maybe I would have done rebooting by now if i didn't return to pmo after the 16 months.

 

I haven't fully recovered yet so I can not say with certainty but I don't believe you necessarily have to stick to vanilla sex. My belief is that post recovery all artificial forms of sexual gratification must be abstained from. That includes pornography, masturbation, and any form of sex workers (strippers, prostitutes).

Maybe I'm wrong but I can't imagine exploration with a partner would be a bad thing.

 

I would suggest Karezza. It's not something I've had the opportunity to to try, having been single for several years, but it works for some, and avoids orgasm, which I think is where the damage is done.

 

No, I haven't lost hope. I'm on day 209, and starting to see some improvements - but still far from recovered. I think what counts is going hard-mode, with no relapses, for as long as it takes - for you, me, and everyone who has found this thread. It could be 2 years, it could even be longer, but the alternative is that you give up, which is pretty much guaranteed to make you worse.

Although you may be seeing your 20s go by, sitting on the sidelines, you are doing something that will be profoundly beneficial in the longer term. Plus, if you didn't know your problems were down to PMO then maybe you'd think either you were just screwed up, or had some mystery illness with no obvious way out; I've been there, and the levels of hopelessness and despair are much higher when you don't have answers. At least knowing that PMO is the cause of your problems gives you a route out, even if it is long and difficult.

Also the way I see it, PMO is probably affecting a LOT of people in this day and age, but perhaps because they haven't hit it as hard as we have (ie amount of time spent PMO'ing), so they won't be so badly affected in the short term, but they may hit middle age and start to encounter the problems that we have (cognitive function, exhaustion, etc etc), that build up over the years and have no idea why - they may put it down to age or something else (which is easily done - done it myself). At that point, they're f*cked because they won't really see what is wrong, whereas you will be through this sh*t and living a better life. I hope this makes sense?

So better to see it now, and deal with it, than having to do it later in life.

 

I now have over 800 days with no porn. I have just started hardmode again after many months with frequent sex. I am still in a horrendous flatline even though I am able to have consistent sex. PAWS is ruining my quality of life.

I strongly believe that recovery might be just around the corner or at least not more than a year away. You will hear from me again once I feel better!

Stay strong guys, and never give up hope!

 

If I’m suffering PAWS, do you recommend having sex/orgasming through oral with a girl? Obviously no masturbation/porn but I have been on 5 months hard mode, my libido is coming back and I need to start doing more things with my gf so do you recommends?

 

How did you cure your CPTSD

 

800 days? Have you considered the possibility that there might be another issue going on? I’ve read a lot of accounts, including those from people who recovered in a year or two after daily binges for 20 years. I mean, I think you should go to a psychiatrist bc you might just have depression. Congrats for avoiding porn for that long, I’m not nearly that good, just relapsed and best streak is 116 days

 

Also I was super depressed and detached during my longest streak and had low seeming libido but my attraction to women was very high and I was horny af so it makes me wonder if I wasn’t actually in a flatline.

 

Personally I mostly stayed away from oral because I wanted to wire myself to normal sex. If you cant get it up without oral you probably need more time.

 

This is not 800 days hard mode because I have had lots of sex. This delays recovery.

 

That is my idea, too. I managed to do that for the first time in my life couple of days ago. And it was anything but easy for me, as it is the opposite of addictive sex. I was so proud to have gained control over myself in that moment. With this experience, I now feel that I also have ammonition in my pistol (pun intended) to tackle not only PMO, but also other detrimental and addictive forms of sexual acting out.

 

Why would it delay recovery when it’s literally teaching your brain to do it with a real human? Also that’s a good sign that you can have sex

 

People severely underestimate how damaging ejaculation is. We were addicted to PMO. O = Orgasm. Orgasm and spilling your seed make you feel fucking amazing and releases tons of dopamine/serotonin. I think one of the reason why people only wanna make it about porn is because we want to keep having that great feeling from O. But we need to accept that we need to heal from PMO in order to fully heal. I know it sucks when we have girlfriends and such, but it doesnt make it any less real.