Checking in. All's well, good day with serious guitar time and a movie with a friend. No real urges to speak of, and I'm grateful to wake up tomorrow 4 days clean. Every day sober is a gift. Be well everyone.
Day 38 All good today. In the morning there was feeling bit lazy and dizzy but I did meditation, my workout and then cold shower all these made me very active it was like magic, not more urges today. yesterday I had wet dream at noon so from that time I am feeling weakness in my body. But I am trying to be vigilant in all times because weakness followed by wet dream increase the chances of relapse...
68 days. Just when I was telling myself that this journey felt easy this week, yesterday provided my mind with some strong temptations to watch P. I think it was good, brought me down a bit so I can continue to stay humble and focused. To deal with these temptations, I worked a bit instead and later watched a great movie called The Fellowship of the Ring in the evening
Day 167 no PMO. Today was a tough day for me. Spent all day working on my car and ended up doing more damage than good. I was doing the work myself to boost my self esteem but because of my failure it ended up doing the opposite. All I could think was how I spent the whole day away from my family and wasted it away. Anyway… this is the part where I feel bad for myself and go look at P but not today! I know that P won’t make me feel better but actually would make me feel worse so staying away. Hope to have a better day today. Good luck out there guys.
No man can slay me because god dam it, I'm a Nazgul I've just fucked up. I don't even know why. It's sad but that's it. On some level I'm feel like I've got some of it out of my system and I have just the right amount of self hate and self love to believe that I can really start a real reboot. No fishing, no peeking, no NOTHING. Just doing the stuff that I know that I should do.
i don´t think that´s a ruined day. you face ydour challenge, you tried to leave your confort zone, that´s life bro . that´s living. you may not know the ways on to work on your car, but you surely learned the ways on not to work . so, nothing is lost . Keep going!!!
Checking in Fellowship!!! Good day so far, being productive and happy all around . On the afternoon i will do my workout then hit the cold shower, then watch sports, and at night keep practicing my handwriting. it´s becoming pretty by the way Checking out. Have a great day Fellowship!!! Onward!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! “The board is set, the pieces are moving. We come to it at last, the great battle of our time.” Gandalf
Reduced coffein-intake that‘s good. Another time I let myself go to fantasies and MO. It’s hard to leave this old road (thinking of neuropathways here) and abstain from the chemical rush, but I want to do it! My sexuality is only spinning about itself and fantasies or porn, I want to reboot it! I can! Soon to become a strong raging Uruk-hai May his rage be a struggle for freedom from the porn ring and may his power be used to stop the craving mind and transmute the sexual energy!
Checking in fellowship friends! 271 days free of Porn, Day 199 free of MO. It's been about a month now, maybe a bit more that I don't use guided meditations to go to sleep. I have regained my natural way to fall asleep, no longer relying on a device. Pretty big win. Enjoy the day!