35 and Older Accountability Group

Discussion in 'Accountability Partners' started by artifact, Nov 24, 2018.

  1. tigate

    tigate Fapstronaut

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    I've heard nofap/no PMO withdrawals for 30 year olds are crazy. I think I'm experiencing them.
     
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  2. discovery

    discovery Fapstronaut

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    Good work Mr. free!!

    I'll take painful testicles any day over painful tentacles o_O
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    5 days no porn. Halfway to Belize!

    Had a rough day emotionally yesterday. It was very, very, strange. Nothing crazy happened externally but internally I went back to my past about something that happened 30 years ago and it tore me inside out. It was like a male PMS or something. Feeling about 90% back today.
     
  3. David2018

    David2018 Fapstronaut

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    I did it. I worked 1 hour and didn't PMO. Normally if I tried to do any work at night like this that 1 hour would take 4 or 5 hours due to PMO and it wouldn't even be good work. I feel really good about this night.
     
  4. David2018

    David2018 Fapstronaut

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    I think if you are addicted, withdrawal will hit you at any age. I know for me if I go a day or two it's no big issue but if I'm at a week I get very irritable. I get annoyed and short tempered. Have to work past that part.
     
  5. tigate

    tigate Fapstronaut

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    But mostly psychological right? not waves of physical symptoms? I mean for younger guys. How young are you mate? I'm turning 35 this year.
     
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  6. David2018

    David2018 Fapstronaut

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    Been a long time since I quit long enough to feel it. I did have physical symptoms. You are getting a lot of dopamine released into your brain from PMO. If you cut that off you'll feel it. Everyone is different. Some people drink and just quit one day and never go back. Others can't. I'm 43 now.
     
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  7. GottaBFree

    GottaBFree Fapstronaut

    Wrong group to get feedback from younger guys lol.

    Starting over again so I’m going to switch it up. No internet but this site got max 10 minutes a day. I’ll have to miss the 48 COVID news stories a day I’ve been reading recently. I’m sure the pandemic will go on either way lol.
     
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  8. David2018

    David2018 Fapstronaut

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    If there was no internet I'd have no issue. If we could just go back to dial up I'd be great! Getting high speed internet in my house ruined me. It was 20 years ago. It's like being on a diet and going to a buffet for dinner every night.
     
  9. Rebooter13

    Rebooter13 Fapstronaut

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    Checking in guys.Relapsed a few hours back.
    History will tell lockdown was a rollback for me...
     
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  10. Pirate3819

    Pirate3819 Fapstronaut

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    Checking in and I am doing well as I can in this environment. I was hesitated to post because I realize several members in this group, as well as other people in this world, are in a financial and mental frenzy right now. This frenzy is causing people to relapse to their vice (Drugs, Alcohol, P, Food, Sugar, etc.) to escape their reality. My hope is this post will provide a tool or method to help a person make the NO PMO lifestyle change.

    I'm fortunate that I will not be feeling the economic impact of COVID19 because I'm afforded the opportunity to telework. However, with P addiction, this is not the best situation. In fact, I change my schedule a year or so ago to reduce the amount of time I spent alone to increase my chances of breaking the P cycle. On top of the telework situation, my fiancée schedule was changed from working 8-5 pm to 4-12 pm. So, I found myself alone in the most venerable time, which is the afternoon for me. As a result, the last four weeks have been quite difficult in my No PMO lifestyle change. Some days I felt like my head and/or crouch was on fire with a sensation that I just wanted to get rid of as fast as possible. Of course, my mind was telling me to FAP using the same techniques as usual. My thoughts were saying, "Just one time won't hurt" "Everyone else is doing" "You've been doing good, so you can afford to fall off the horse," etc. At times the velocity of the thoughts and the pressure of the sensation was incredibly challenging. So, I work the techniques I learned from my many failures in my recovery of PMO. First, acknowledging, sometimes out loud, that I am having thoughts about P, and I am feeling very anxious and describing where I feel the sensation and what it feels and a description of the sensation. For example, I say, "I'm feeling anxious, which appears as a warm and tight sensation in an oval shape in my head on the left side above my eye. I stay with that feeling as long as possible. After a while, usually, it disappears for a few minutes, hours, or days. I learned that, like every living thing in life, sensation comes and goes. Also, during these times of anxious/stress, I try to avoid altering my reality with other substances like alcohol or sugar. I love a good whiskey or bourbon neat or as Manhattan cocktail, as well as chocolate chip cookies and ice cream. However, during these times, it is best not to try to alter my reality because I am teaching myself to change my reality by using an outside, unhealthy substance. Basically, I am paying Peter, to rob Paul. I must go through the thoughts and sensations to learn how to cope with them, or I am just covering them up with another unhealthy addiction/habit.

    Charlie Munger said, "All I want to know is where I'm going to die, so I'll never go there." For us, P is where we go to die. We all know we are not living our full life on P, that's what brought us to this group. Let's keep that in mind on this journey. Mike Tyson said, "Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth." P has and probably will continue to punch me in the mouth. However, I have a plan to keep moving forward with defensive (Mayweather) techniques I learned. (Huge boxing/MMA fan)

    A great compliment to the technique I describe above is open with fiancée with struggles. I have committed to telling my fiancée if I shall every relapse right away. Every so often, she asks me how I am doing, and I tell her the truth. Being honest shines a light on this dark addiction/habit.
    Stay encouraged!
     
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  11. Thanks for the inspiring thoughts. I like the concept of self-awareness instead of self-medication, I need to put it into practice more often. You are not far off from the 6 months mark, I hope you make it. I want to get it together myself and be a better role model for the group. Three days today, that's a start I guess.:cool:
     
  12. Oh no! How will you make it? :D
     
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  13. Well it stinks having to drop 3 guys from the group in one day, but the good news is we have 3 new members. Welcome to @Commitment1 , @brtiger83 , and @Kebin , hope the group is helpful for you.
     
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  14. brtiger83

    brtiger83 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for letting me join the group. I am 36/m, married with no kids. This is my first serious effort to get over pron addiction which has afflicted me since I was in my teens. My longest streak ever has been about 35 days without PMO, which was without the community support of a place like NoFap. I just made it past the 2 week mark and I am determined to get to 90 days.
     
  15. David2018

    David2018 Fapstronaut

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    2 weeks is great. Keep going. Make this the place you go to instead of porn.
     
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  16. David2018

    David2018 Fapstronaut

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    Using your computer out in the open is so important. I try to make sure my office at work is arranged to be as open as possible. I have 0 problems at work. But I've had jobs where my computer was much more private and it was a big problem. Especially since I was mostly just going to chat rooms so there are really no pictures to worry about.

    I changed my whole home office around to make my computer screens very visible to the family. Of course I still get around it that but it helps.
     
    Last edited: Apr 24, 2020
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  17. JJ_Kino

    JJ_Kino Fapstronaut

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    Hello all

    Coming to the end of day 24 and must say for the last 2 days I haven't had any real urges at all, is this what they call flatline?

    Feeling more and more positive everyday, I'm staying clear of triggers, speaking to a few girls and told them of my journey, they're being very supportive which I believe is helping.

    I am noticing more morning wood's, though I am having trouble staying asleep (i keep waking up midsleep ) not sure if that's to do with me working night shifts or not.
     
  18. JJ_Kino

    JJ_Kino Fapstronaut

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    Everyday is a small win for us all.

    Keep going lads!
     
    Last edited: Apr 24, 2020
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  19. David2018

    David2018 Fapstronaut

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    3 days and feeling so good about it. Today feels easier than yesterday, so far.
     
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  20. GottaBFree

    GottaBFree Fapstronaut

    I reset the counter earlier and clicked the wrong date... So I’m resetting the counter but not another reset lol.

    Getting going again still. I avoid checking anybody out other than my wife well. When I’m watching movies by myself I fast forward any part that looks like it could be triggering.

    It requires being dedicated 24/7 though. I’m like 99% dedicated and living a PM free life. GottaB100% to be free though.
     
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