35 and Older Accountability Group

Start afresh with new determination and don't be hard on yourself for relapsing!

 

I'm starting to notice these waves too....I'm 21 days in now and just gone through a little wave of a couple of days of feeling flat and low energy and my desire to edge increases (which I know can quickly lead to P use)...managed to get through it and now in a period of a few days of higher energy where it feels so much easier to abstain and don't have the desire to touch myself.

 

Reset for me. I'm worried about a meeting next week, I think I need to find a different way to deal with the anxiety

 

check seven

 

Reset - I have a stressful event coming up and know my mind just presented its best sugar hit to get rid of the unwanted emotions.
It always amazes me why a grown man can react to circumstances like a little child in this part of his life.

 

Keeping on keeping on.....

 

Dealing with some heavy emotions around my own betrayal trauma from my wife's affair. That was 11 years ago but we didn't have the therapeutic tools to deal with it properly. This stuff is resurfacing as I'm about to give her my full disclosure. Some couple we are.

Glad to say urges are low, and at least for now, and my commitment to no PMO seems solid.

This week:
6 days exercise
3 days meditation

 

Continuing my streak...staying solid and checking in. More stress next week so lets see if I can handle it

 

Weekend check in. Things are going good on the PMO front. Need to get a bit more productive next week. Also need to be healthier.

 

Checking in again like I have every day since this streak began. Have big plans for the future and this involves keeping away from PMO and so far so good....would be nowhere without this group for support!

 

Checking in. I haven't watched porn for about 8 months now. I have 0 super powers, still get cravings, brain fog, flatlines and swinging emotions and life sucks as always but every time I think about guys stuck to the screens watching other people having sex I feel proud as fuck that I don't do that anymore.
For those who relapse frequently, the only thing you learn from relapsing is how to relapse again. The only way to quit is to say you're quitting and to hell with the emotions. Emotions don't count in life, only the results.
Good luck brothers

 

Well said! Keep pushing until those negative thoughts no longer have power over you and you are completely free . You got this!

 

Checking in today! Start of Day 13! I'm excited because it's been a minute since I've been this far along! Defensive mindsets are set in place. I'm going to be more on my own /home alone for the next 3 to 4 days so I am developing a game plan of a bunch of different activities I can do when I may be bored or stressed.
Today is also my 30th day in a row practicing meditation! This will be a lifelong practice for me.
Inspirational quote I've been reflecting on from the weekend:
"Nothing is either good or bad, but thinking makes it so"

 

14 days.

 

Had a reset on Sunday. I am so depressed that I couldn't tell it here.

I am fed up of this addiction, my anxiety is back, once again I don't feel any motivation to do anything. I don't know how to gather the seriousness and courage which I had in that long streak. When I was doing PMO I could literally feel that something is rushing in my head like a flood. And now today I have terrible brain fog, suicidal thoughts, anxiety, pale face, depression can be seen on my face, lack of sleep, lack of energy, lost discipline. Literally back to point 0 psychologically.

Also, I didn't last even for 10 secs. My PE seems psychological. Also, the quantity of semen is so less.

I need to find my lost seriousness about life , need to make genuine efforts again. I need to check-in here on a daily basis.

 

I got to 60 days, then bounced around for 2 months not getting above 2 weeks. I've realised now that it's not about getting to 6 months, it's about doing as many days as it takes to reboot my brain, and then doing whatever it takes to change my life for the better so I don't backslide.

NoFap is a 2 phase fix... phase 1 is to rewire your brain. We've both pretty much done that, though more time definitely can't hurt. Phase 2 is to rewire your life, so you don't feel a need to go back to porn. This is a lot harder, but also necessary. For me, it's finding a partner, getting out of the house, not watching so much YouTube, becoming healthier and more active, etc. If you don't work on that stuff, you slip back into porn through boredom/unhappiness, and then all those old circuits in your brain light up again.

You may feel terrible now, but it's only because you felt so amazing when you were at 120 days... the difference is incredible. But all the work you did to rewire your brain hasn't been undone... not yet. Get back on NoFap and you will easily maintain all that work.

Life has a way of rushing by without giving you a moment's notice. I'm 38 and I still do most of the same things I did at 23, though I'm running full force to change it all now. It's very hard, but I'm the only one that can do it. And I'm not going to give up and just stay at the same level for the rest of my life.

There's a life out there with more happiness than you can possibly imagine. But only if you get your shit together.

 

Interesting to know about the 0 superpowers, continued urges etc but amazing that you've got so far and I have no doubt that abstinence has given you a lot of very positive things, not at least will power and freedom from compulsive addiction. Well done you should be proud!

 

Checking in...coming up to one month free of PMO and determined to continue

 

Checking in. I also am struggling to get back to the long streak I had before. I think there is a certain amount of "just do it and don't mope about it" that needs to happen to get a streak going.