Separate names with a comma.
Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by 2525, Dec 27, 2017.
Check in day 5
30 days completed.
It was a battle with the urges to stay clean and I did it.
C. One-Hundred. I decided to post on day 100 rather than on day ninety because it sounds more spectacular, and also because the number means more to me than ninety. Haven't had night emissions for a month now. I'm not in a flatline but I feel as if I was. That's because, without porn on my mind, I feel very good and relaxed. Brain fog is completely gone. Contact with nudes or similars is in the end inevitable, for example with films or photoes. But those images quickly faint away, leaving me to my serenity. See you in 50 days.
My girlfriend came back and has been trying to work things out with me.. Not really sure how to feel.. I wish this all wasnt so complicated.
I completed my first day with God's grace. Many a times I felt like returning to pornography during the day but God gave me grace to resist, the thought of having an account at nofap and what will I say to people there if I indulge in this sin again made me stop. Glory to Jesus. The Lord even sent a pastor to our house and through him He encouraged me and prophesied good things to come. I once again thank God for this wonderful community and this blessed day.
A new day. Mentally and emotianally ive been in a uncomfortable place for the last few days which makes me more vulnerable to bad reactions and decisions. I let my daughters mother entice me into a finger pointing, anger filled text exchange. This is a no win thing for me. Even if i "win" the fight i feel like crap after. If i let her carry on without responding i may feel anger for a while but when that passes im at peace. I need to reset my default. To learn not to be swept away by destructive emotions and extend basic respect and kindness in spite of what im feeling. This is what im working toward. One day at a time
Guys, after my recent stumbles, I feel I need to try a shorter challenge before taking this one on again. Heading over to the 90-day thread I think. Will return once I've succeeded there. Keep fighting, my friends, never ever give up. Thanks for all your support.
Day 107/365 No time for urges, slaughtering them as fast as i can, no mercy!
Day 1 (again)
31 days completed.
Hoping to see you back in 90 days
Battled my way through another night of urges. I noted the time my urges started last night: 8:31 PM. I tried to observe the urges for a while but they were too strong. So distraction was the only way. I read Letting Go to its completion and slept at around 11:10 PM. That book is pretty dawn good. It has equipped me with knowledge on how to let go of negative feelings in a natural way.
Change Your Brain Change Your Life (Daniel Amen) that I read last week shows the genesis of many addictions may be brain dysfunction in areas such as the pre-frontal cortex, anterior cingulate gyrus and limbic system. I took an online brain test recommended by Daniel Amen and found that I may have low function in my pre-frontal cortex no wonder I have trouble with focusing on a single task, struggle to control impulses and 'love' getting into conflicts with others. I am now taking steps to improve my pre-frontal cortex executive function. Apparently, porn addiction greatly lowers pre frontal cortex executive function so zero tolerance abstinence will have to taken more seriously. No excuses for peeking! I am now well armed to take my battle with PMO to the next level. I now know how brain dysfunction and past trauma associated with negative feelings may be at the foundation of my problems. I can now build a better strategy to deal with the underlying problems rather than deal with the symptoms and stop under estimating the scale of the problem.
Check in wednesday. Its worth all the effords