Gopala_Krishnan
Fapstronaut
I came to this forum after seeing the videos related to 'your brain on porn book' by Gary Wilson. I've never thought that quitting porn was practically feasible. I have tried and failed many times on my own. This time, I started off by motivating my self by watching videos posted by Fapstronauts on youtube. After about two weeks into NoFap, I started noticing changes in my mental performance. I started remembering things to more greater detail and started living in the moment. I was able to analyze problems better. It is not that I got smarter. The change is that, I am more focused at the current moment and that very focus ripples to many benefits and ultimately gives more satisfaction.
Problems: Urges, urges, urges.. But they come and go. What I have noticed is that they are stronger when you feel bad about yourself. You've trained your brain to look for instant gratification from porn in similar times. The habit is strongly etched and it tries to repeat it self. At such times, I had to motivate my self by watching videos on benefits of NoFap. I started to going to places of worship on the weekends. It was tough but I figured some way to deal with it.
I also want to share that some very normal videos can trigger you towards porn use. I started watching a T V series where one of the male character is sexually promiscuous. Although there was no nudity in the show the idea of a guy having many sexual relationships was enough to trigger. My another vulnerable point was when I started watching some educational videos about sex. Like how to do x, y and z to/with your partner. Again no nudity was involved but creates more fantasies, I think these are ways your sub-conscious mind can trick you into porn use.
My learning is that 'at least for the first 90 days', the key is not in creating the ability to handle these urges. But it is not putting your self to a position where you get these urges. If you notice that you doing something is making you want to PMO, then don't do it. Staying alone in weekends is a good example. It is not that you stay alone and try to control your urges. It is you avoid staying alone so that you don't let the urges raise or get stronger. I feel that this theory would work at least in the first 90 days.
I look forward to post another note after 180 days.
Peace!
Problems: Urges, urges, urges.. But they come and go. What I have noticed is that they are stronger when you feel bad about yourself. You've trained your brain to look for instant gratification from porn in similar times. The habit is strongly etched and it tries to repeat it self. At such times, I had to motivate my self by watching videos on benefits of NoFap. I started to going to places of worship on the weekends. It was tough but I figured some way to deal with it.
I also want to share that some very normal videos can trigger you towards porn use. I started watching a T V series where one of the male character is sexually promiscuous. Although there was no nudity in the show the idea of a guy having many sexual relationships was enough to trigger. My another vulnerable point was when I started watching some educational videos about sex. Like how to do x, y and z to/with your partner. Again no nudity was involved but creates more fantasies, I think these are ways your sub-conscious mind can trick you into porn use.
My learning is that 'at least for the first 90 days', the key is not in creating the ability to handle these urges. But it is not putting your self to a position where you get these urges. If you notice that you doing something is making you want to PMO, then don't do it. Staying alone in weekends is a good example. It is not that you stay alone and try to control your urges. It is you avoid staying alone so that you don't let the urges raise or get stronger. I feel that this theory would work at least in the first 90 days.
I look forward to post another note after 180 days.
Peace!