Addiction to femdom/sissy porn trying to have normal sex for the first time

Porn is like a recreational drug — you always need more and more. It also creates fetishes.

You need to stop all porn immediately, and never again use porn.

Also stop masturbating.

And don't act out any of your fetishes.

Because you are so far down the road, it might take a long time for you to recover. There are no shortcuts, because porn makes physical changes to your brain. When you stop using porn and masturbating, it takes months for your brain to undo those changes.

You will eventually lose those fetishes, and you will return to normal functioning. But, it will take time. Please read about what to expect, because you will have all sorts of weird emotions, and you will sometimes flatline. Do NOT let those scare you into using porn and masturbating again, because that will set you back.

I wish that I could tell you that there's a quick solution, but unfortunately there isn't. You need to let biology do its thing and repair your brain. But you have to commit to never again using porn, and don't act out your fetishes.

Good luck

 

First of all, you should relax and worry less. No matter how this will go, it is not the end of the world.
It's a long journey, make the best of each day. You will feel better, progressively.
Your girlfriend should be patient, there is no quick fix for that, unless you take ED pills.

 

It is curable, please PM me. Are you saying your girlfriend is dominant? Not trying to be rude but women who do femdom are the sort of "people" you should avoid. The mental damage from femdom can make you suicidal if you cure masochism after.

 

You're in luck. Turn it around now and there is still hope for you. Lots of hope. You may have gone deep, but it does not sound like you were in it for too long.
I agree with others here that it may be a long road ahead, but it is manageable.

I was slipping into this kind of stuff for a few years when my girlfriend did cuckold me (and years later realised that I had been cuckolded before, too, but was just in so much denial about it that I never saw it). Well, that led me deeper into the genre and for 10+ years I actively sought a woman who would cuckold me.

It has been a long road to healing. It's taken years! And I still struggle, those fantasies still pop up, but I am able to have a successful relationship with a beautiful woman who only wants to be with me. If I can do it, then you can too! You have a great life ahead of you just so long as you turn that corner now!

 

"You will eventually lose those fetishes, and you will return to normal functioning." Promise?

 

Hello friend. I used to be in a situation very similar to you, but it has since passed.

I was very deep in a sissy porn addiction. Over the worst three month span, I was PMOing for about 5 hours a day, with porn, hypno, clothes, chastity, and sex toys. It had such a grip on my mind, the fantasy of it all started seeping into my normal life, and I seriously thought I was transgender woman. From 15-19 years old, I was PMOing to sP about 3 hours a day.

One thing that really pushed me deeper into this addiction was the first time I had sex. My PIED was so bad, I couldn't even get a 20% erection. I thought I wasn't attracted to women and that my penis didn't work, which really made me question who I was.

Looking back though, this was all instilled by porn. I now have a great sex and romantic life with women, my PIED is gone, and my urges for sissy porn and related themes are weak and fleeting. I no longer feel ashamed or embarrassed about that part of my life, or even that I still feel aroused by it sometimes. It was all instilled by porn and has no bearing on who I am or what I can do with my life.

It is very good that you can still have sex with girlfriend. It means that this terrible affliction has not fully rooted in your mind. Regardless, you should still follow the baseline steps for getting rid of PIED and any porn addiction.

First of all, you need a reboot. You must go 90 days without any artificially arousing material, without any sensual/sexual stimulation, and with any orgasms. Even doing stuff with your girlfriend during a reboot will slow down your recovery. Right now, your mind has made neural connections between artificial arousal<=>sissyporn<=>pleasure<=>femdom<=> and orgasm. If any of these are sensed, they all will fire; while having sex won't hurt your recovery, it will slow it down. It is quickest and most effective to just go 3 months with no pleasure from your gf, so that the neurons die off very quickly. During your reboot, you can still kiss, cuddle, and give oral sex to your gf, as long as you are never stimulated.

After your reboot, you need to start having sex. A reboot clears your brain's sexual reward centers, and having sex rewires your brain to positive sexual interactions. Doing this makes sissy porn's effect on you very weak and inconsistent. You will also find real partners much more arousing and pleasurable, which will make sex and climaxing feel much better and easier.

Many guys have stood in the same shoes as you and made full recoveries. You can too, you just have to follow the right steps. I'll link some articles on Your Brain on Porn for further reading. Reply or DM me if you have other questions. Good luck man

Overview

Porn FAQs

Rebooting with a partner: What about sex?

What do I say to my mate?

Porn-induced ED: What do I tell my girlfriend?

 

You quit that trash now, or you'll probably be stucked on that for years like a lot of people in this forum.

 

If porn created your fetish, going clean will let your brain clear out the fetish. The experience of many, many people on this forum (including me) shows this to be the case.

I strongly suggest that you also get therapy for your personal problems, because it will speed up the process. It will still take many months, but your healing will be faster and deeper.

 

Thank you for the advice and the encouragement, it is much appreciated. I do believe I need therapy for matters of insecurity and self-image.

 

Yes. Every addiction starts for a reason. People without a reason don't get addicted.

That's why one person can try smoking and get addicted, while another tries and says, "That's not for me." Same with alcohol, porn, whatever.

Then, once you're addicted, the addiction makes the existing problems worse, and adds new problems.

That's why every addict needs therapy. When you get rid of the reason for your addiction, it's much, much easier to throw away the addiction.

 

Until the quarantine ends, it is bitter resolve and diligent study. Thank you for the kind assurances and the helpful elaboration, brother.