Addiction vs habit (how to look at it?)

L

Linerider

Fapstronaut
Hi friends,
I've read a lot of books and articles about this in hopes of overcoming it.
I came across different theories and approaches.
One approach is 1. This is an addiction. It's a serious thing. You are partly not to blame as it's an addiction. And it was caused by trauma.
The second approach is 2. This is merely a habit. Look at it as a habit that's unproductive that you want to leave. Just a habit. By looking at it as an addiction you give it more energy and power (I am an addict- can become your identity/reality in a self fulfilling prophecy type of way).
I was free for 6 months once. I think I had the 2nd approach.
What are your thoughts, how should we look at this and has your streak grown when you changed your view on this?
 
Hello, been in this journey for 4 years.

My view changed when I do feel anxious, muscle tension, and brain fog (hate it so much) after I relapse from a long streak.

I think the problem is not to reach a high streak but to keep it. Once you start to feeling well you become overconfident and forget the bad moments you been through to get there.

If I have to choose I would go for option #2 (Habit); but with a little twist. My habit is to not watch porn and masturbate again, but live a happy life with ease

Regards
 
I think there is truth to both ways of looking at it, both with advantages and flaws. To see it as addiction helps you to see the gravity of the situation, and the surrounding literature often describes the cycle that we find ourselves repeating. To see it as a habit sees it more lightly, and can help one focus on other aspects, giving a way to replace it with better habits, as well as not bringing the baggage that the label addict might bring.

The truth is that both ways of seeing it is just a lens. Every lens is imperfect and distorts the reality of the situation a little bit. But regardless, it is what it is. Whichever way helps us see the next step forward is the best way to look at it in the moment. I've struggled with PMO for a long time, even after seeking help, so right now I see it as an addiction, but I also treat it a lot lighter than I used to. I am just trying to focus on building a better life. I try to spend my time and energy finding the next step that I can take to do that, and am hoping that will be enough to keep me away from NoFap.

Also I've started to focus on eliminating unhealthy dopamine sources such as videos and video games, and even recreational internet articles. If I am on a pc, I am either working or posting here. Using blockers for that atm, but I make it with absolutely no locks. That way it's more of a choice. If it's something that I choose, I feel less inclined to "get around" them.
 
Great decision to eliminate unhealthy dopamine sources! i did it too and it is great (in my case video games/social media)

I would like to know how did you feel during those 6 months (such a milestone btw, congrats!)... did you get into any flatlines? how did you feel after you get over them? Also.. when you relapse after that streak, does it feel the same as previous relapses?

Based of on those answers, I think you could find a lot of motivation.

Look forward to your answer
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top