feel like my urges are eating my mind

You touched on one of them there, you get them more strongly when at home and alone.
If you feel it getting unbearable, get out of the house for a while and around other people.

 

I concur with @Freddiefox . Keep yourself out of the house. It will certainly help a lot.

Know that every bad feeling you are getting about your situation now can be changed immediately if you just change your perspective. When the urge hits you, all you have to do is say "I understand how bad this for my life. No matter how many times I fail, I will start again and I will win". Take away the power of the addiction. Don't give it power by saying " oh its too much! I can't handle it. What do I do if I fail?" . Remember any negative thought will be taken advantage of by your addicted brain. I am not saying oh think positive all the time because I know that is pure crap as everyone feels low or depressed a lot maybe even everyday.

All I am saying is, make your reason stronger. I have hurt myself using knives, fire, you name it, to make myself understand how bad this is for me. It is completely destroying my life and I have been trying to quit it for 8 years now. Lust has a way of sneaking up on you and overpowering the logical side of your brain. So never let your guard down and always remember a better, happier future you is waiting for you, all you have to do is make a commitment. Hit me up if you want me to keep you accountable, I could surely use some more help

 

There's a bunch of videos in this thread, watch the one called "Neuroscience speaks on how porn destroys willpower"

https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.p...to-share-this-inspiration-with-others.185218/
(6th post down)

 

I am the complete opposite. My urges grow stronger when I go outside but more so in areas filled with hot girls. Porn is not as strong to me as my lust for real women.

 

Understood. In that case avoid those places. Maybe an activity or class or something where there are no hot girls?