I’m an 18 year old virgin

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Aki Kimura, Nov 3, 2018.

  1. Aki Kimura

    Aki Kimura New Fapstronaut

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    I am 18 and I’m a virgin. I am currently living with my parents and without a job. I’ve wanted to get laid since I was 13 or 14, not because people in my school did it but because I had and still have curiosity about how it feels. People tell me to wait and wait more but I waited for too much now. I am shy, I have no self confidence and I’m not good looking. In my school the girls used to judge me by the looks, or at least that is how it felt to me. Some didn’t but I was too shy, as I already mentioned. I used to beat my meat every day until now, November. I am trying to not masturbate for 30 days as the 3N challenge and I am extremely desperate. I don’t want a hooker because I am more likely to get infections with those than with someone else. Please, tell me what to do to have sex. I don’t want to die without experiencing the coochie or building a PC.
     
  2. AUTiger7222

    AUTiger7222 Fapstronaut

    First off, I'd encourage you to realize that you're only 18 years old. You're still basically a kid for the most part. I mean sure, you're a legal adult, but in terms of brain development, ect, you're a kid. I understand your desires and curiosity towards sex. I understand living at home and having no job so you have way too much time on your hands to think and that only makes matters worse. I would encourage you to find something that you enjoy doing and pursue that activity instead of only focusing on how bad you want to get laid. Remember how young you are and that you've got a full lifetime ahead of you.
     
  3. CH3RRY

    CH3RRY Fapstronaut

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    Hey, I'm an 18-year-old virgin too. I'm being patient with this, and I'd suggest for you to be aswell. You have to fix your issues first, quitting masturbation is one of the most important steps you have to take. Masturbation is most likely a strong source of your confidence and insecurity issues. You probably have other insecurities too, so start working on them aswell. I've been and still partially am in a similar situation, you need to understand that losing your virginity may not be urgent or possible in your current life situation. But eventually when you keep striving up to that and improving yourself, the right time will come.
     
    WanderTruth, Suffleme and Aki Kimura like this.
  4. CH3RRY

    CH3RRY Fapstronaut

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    Your comment was very insightful and relieving. It's good to hear from older, more experienced people.
     
  5. Runkkari

    Runkkari Fapstronaut

    I'm also a 19 years old virgin and a pmo addict since The age of 10. Virgin due to pmo addiction.
     
  6. meatsandwich

    meatsandwich Fapstronaut

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    - Really when it comes to being virgin, it doesn't matter as you can go forward to improve yourself and find someone special to spend rest of your life,
    also having that special moment from love not trough just pure lust. ;)
     
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  7. AUTiger7222

    AUTiger7222 Fapstronaut

    I'm only 31 and far from a finished product. I'm still in college pursing my career job. So I've had to try to learn patience and it's far harder than it might seem to some people where it comes naturally.
     
  8. AUTiger7222

    AUTiger7222 Fapstronaut

    Absolutely!! I wish I would have waited to share that first time with my wife! Plus I would still be naive and that would make it easier to deal with than having done it a couple times and now I know what I'm missing. Sometimes ignorance really is bliss.
     
    OrangeJuice13 and meatsandwich like this.
  9. picchio86

    picchio86 Fapstronaut

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    I have been virgin until 30 when I decided to have children. What was destroying me at the time was not the impossibility of sex, but the idea to die alone with no one loving me except for my family. Sex is very important, but you should see it not as something like have the best steak in the country, but something that comes after a long voyage. In addition, at your age girls will look for sure older guys, and I don’t think pointing at 14 and 16 girls is good idea, legal thing aside. Think about yourself, be selfish travel, knew the world don’t stay in your spot thinking I will never fuck. At your age I was enlisting the army, applying for college and other things. Develop your self, and with time and by exploring the world you will find also love. Even for a short period, nobody knows, but you will. You are young don’t worry be happy and just improve
     
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  10. 4DCreator

    4DCreator Fapstronaut

    I had my first sex when I was 23 and there is nothing wrong about it. Having sex with the right woman feels great and you can become very addictive to it. So be careful. It is good to handle the addictive pattern first.
     
    WanderTruth likes this.
  11. Stating '18 year old virgin' as a diagnosis made me chuckle. At least a half of eighteen year olds are virgins and it's not like it's the defective half. There are beautiful people of both genders in their twenties who never had coitus. Calm down.
     
  12. outlander.9

    outlander.9 Fapstronaut

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    I'm gonna tell you a secret:

    A great deal of the people you know at school who are bragging about having all kinds of sex are completely making that shit up. I will even go so far as to say that many of them are probably struggling with the same porn problems and maybe even worse, and are just making up stories in search of validation. They'll bust your balls over the same things that they personally struggle with because they feel like losers.

    And girls your age? They're even more insecure and desperate than the guys, especially the cute and popular ones. You're just not seeing it yet because you still view them as some rare and unobtainable alien species.

    18 years of age is not some magic number where you automatically become a loser if you're not sexually active. You're still maturing, and I promise you that sex doesn't get worse as you get older. Just take care of your business and cross that bridge when you get there, dating in school is massively overrated anyway.
     
    drac16 and picchio86 like this.
  13. Ridley

    Ridley Fapstronaut

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    What?! You FREAK.

    Okay, that was a joke. Hopefully it made you laugh a little bit, because I think you need to lighten up a bit. I know plenty of guys who are almost in their thirties and still haven't had sex yet. Losing your virginity won't make you any happier than you are now. Losing your virginity won't make you any more successful than you are now. Losing your virginity won't make you any more of a man than you are now. Losing your virginity won't solve any of your problems.

    You want to do it because you're curious about how it feels. Okay, I'll admit that's not the worst reason I've ever heard. Well, I hate to spoil the ending for ya, but it feels good. It feels really good to have sex. It's a great feeling, and it's even better if you do it with someone you love and care about very deeply.

    Having said that, I'll mention something else: it's not going to make you happy. It will make you feel good, but the feeling doesn't last forever, and eventually you'll be right back where you are now, filled with desire and more curiosity about other things. Furthermore, sex comes with its own prices to pay. I'm sure you already know that sex comes with the risk of certain diseases, and there's also the risk of unwanted pregnancy. Additionally, there's emotional risk involved with sex. Sex has a way of making you feel very strongly about a person. It can make you feel that much more invested in a person, and the prospect of them not being a part of your life anymore becomes that much more painful. It also becomes confusing and sometimes difficult when the person you are having sex with doesn't want to have sex with you anymore. It's beautiful, yes, and none of us would be here without it, but it also carries some great responsibility with it.

    There's no rush to have sex, dude. It'll happen when it happens and, when it does, you'll see what I'm saying about the responsibility that comes along with it.

    No you haven't. Some of my closest friends are almost in their thirties and still haven't had sex yet. They're wonderful people, and there's nothing wrong with them.

    There are *many* other reasons not to get a hooker aside from just the infections (legal trouble, dealing with her boss, emotional disconnection during sex, she doesn't give a shit about you, costs lots of money, you will never be able to say you didn't sleep with a hooker, etc.), but I agree nonetheless.

    Stop trying.

    Focus on yourself. Practice your creative skills. Spend time with your friends and family. Do things you love doing. Exercise. Go outside and look at all the interesting plants and animals that live on this planet. Travel. Work different jobs until you find one you like. Enjoy your life!

    I'm not saying that enjoying your life will get you laid. In fact, you might die a virgin. I'm just saying that if you focus on yourself and enjoying the little things in your day to day life, you'll realize that you don't need to have sex to be happy.
     
  14. Sodawatt

    Sodawatt Fapstronaut

    Hey, also a 19-yr old virgin doing No nut november. I know the pain of never having sex, but recently I just decided to let the angst go, since I hear everywhere that sex isn't as great as it sounds, and especially if it's done for the sake of losing virginity. I had multiple opportunities for sex, and each time resulted in just a flaccid handjob because I can never get it up during the most crucial moments. That resulted in a lot of shame and self-realization that I need to fix myself before doing the act with other people. And I came to another realization that no one really cares that much if you're a virgin, no matter what your age. They're much more concerned with themselves and their own insecurities.

    So just coming from personal experience, I would say "check yourself before you wreck yourself", or rather make sure you're 100% ready to have sex before you try to do it with some random, or else it will be terrible.
     
    Jeddo and outlander.9 like this.
  15. tiredofdoingthis

    tiredofdoingthis Fapstronaut

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    Listen to me, I lost my virginity at age 29. Thankfully, that beautiful woman is my wife. Sex isn't the massive thing everyone makes it out to be. Sure, it is fun if you aren't overthinking everything. If you build it up into too much you will just be let down. I would encourage you to keep working on yourself. Improve your self confidence and concept of yourself. My problem, much like yours, I was very shy. I didn't think I looked good. I think when you find the right person, it will all start to fall into place. Take your focus off your age and the fast that you are a virgin. It's REALLY not a big deal. I somewhat regret that I didn't have more experiences, but I was so worried about what it would mean to someone to be my first at that age. I kind of freaked out about it. It wasn't a big deal to her. Us guys get really caught up in size, age, numbers, etc. It's not a big issue to women. My wife actually found it admirable and endearing. You need to work on self confidence....that's your biggest issue.
     
  16. tiredofdoingthis

    tiredofdoingthis Fapstronaut

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    Guys, loneliness is what you are really feeling. You are wanting a REAL relationship with a REAL woman. I understand how difficult the loneliness is. Just don't feel bad that you haven't had sex yet. Keep working to find that real relationship.
     
  17. Sharksvv

    Sharksvv Fapstronaut

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    You’re 18!! Honestly I would estimate the vast majority of people lose their virginity in their 20’s. For ex I’m 26 and I lost my virginity last year at 25 years old with my current girlfriend. I feel that many people would consider this to be a common age to do so. Others would consider me to be a “late bloomer” at the end of the day it doesn’t really matter.

    Honestly at 18 I wasn’t even mature enough to have sex or maintain any kind of relationship that came along with it.
     
  18. Bad_hombre

    Bad_hombre Fapstronaut

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    In my opinion, you did a lot of waiting and waiting more won't help you, rather you must take actions to move on with your life. Dont buy into this talk that you're way too young to feel bad about where you are in life. The nofap challenge is the 1st step towards your embetterment now it's up to you to continue educating yourself in a variety of subjects and focusing on being better than who you were yesterday. Yes, you have time, nevertheless, you ought to use it well.

    Cheers
     
  19. drac16

    drac16 Fapstronaut

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    If it makes you feel better, know that I'm 29 and still a virgin. I have faith that God will bring the right woman into my life at the appropriate time. It's not something to be ashamed of. To be honest, I kind of like being celibate and single. If I had a girlfriend or wife, my time would be divided between her and my other hobbies.
     
  20. LOSEmyselftoSAVEmyself

    LOSEmyselftoSAVEmyself Fapstronaut

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    I have a few things to say about this, I hope it helps:

    Having sex is not a big deal, once it's been experienced. It doesn't even last a full 10 minutes, and that is a documented fact!

    Lemmy of Motorhead wrote a song about it, the title sums it up, "The Chase is Better Than The Catch". It's a male idosyncracy, which is that the moment sex is over with a real female, a guy does not want to be around the woman. When the sex is over, a guy wants to turn over and take a nap, watch football, get something to eat, but the main thing he wants is to get away from her! I don't know why this happens to me, but I'm not an isolated case, I guarantee.

    This is a major drawback to being with a woman that every man needs to consider. What will be the cost to get to the sex? If a guy thinks it's going to be cheap, he's way, way off the mark. These stories about rock stars and Charlie Sheen-types are largely myth.

    The fact is that a woman knows that a man is only after the sex, so she's going to use that fact to HER advantage. She has no limit to what she will take from a man, not just money and precious time. She is an emotional liability, feels no shame, and at all times retains the option to walk away.

    If a guy is young and he gets laid, once in a while, it comes free or cheap. This is a problem because if this happens, a guy thinks he is entitled to it that way for life. This mindset makes a man believe bad things about women and about himself.

    A man who gets sex from a girl will also have another serious problem. The next day, he needs it again. Who is he to call? The girl from yesterday. And now, since he's sampled the goods, she will invariably raise the price. She ultimately controls every aspect of a man.

    What is the solution? Either the prostitute, who has a limited cost, or relapse. I lean towards relapse BUT ONLY IF there has been a RECENT COMPLETED REBOOT.

    Dating is a mindgame maze. It's a waste of time. It has a million problems, the main one is that women treat guys like crap who are not rich. The guys who are rich have their pick of women, but instead, they prefer to settle down and contain the madness to a more controllable element, a certain woman.

    Ask around if any of this is true. Don't ask a married guy, he's been hypnotized! Ask a single man, middle aged, who has been through the ringer as I have.
     

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