Many people on the nofap forum are approaching nofap incorrectly

Nice post bro.Really deep meaning...Thnxx for sharing this

 

Hello Timmy.
Thank you for your great post, I've got some remarks and comments for the text above.

I can only agree with this. The reason of this bad habit we are fighting might be different among us, but it is never in itself. The urge itself is not strongh enough to defeat you (or at least with some practice..), but there are other aspects. You might have wrong social life and therefore sit at the computer all day (and then the realpse is very quick and easy..). You may feel an intensive loneliness or you miss hobbys, etc.. especially after some time (months, or years in our case) it happens, that this habit seems as a only way to get a relieve from your everyday life. If you don't have some motivation and other activities which deserve your time and concentration, you will fade into bad mood and specific mindset where only way of relieve is masturbation (or alcohol, drug, whatever.. it works same for every addiction). In these states of mind, it is like if the world fades to the grey and only way to get to color back is in the addiction. Don't believe it. It is lie - you know it.

Agree, again. I said something similar in my thread. This is a great place where to get support and help from guys like you. Or the way how to help others. But let's say, that you are feeling low and you are just sitting next to computer and chat here. It might work, but there is also a large danger of slip - just open another panel in browser and slip. What seems more apropriate to me, is just turn off the computer and go do something useful. Do some sports. Just go for a walk, or have a cup of good tea. Whatever. But don't turn your computer on, until you cheer up. This is very important.

Very good point. You need to help some other methods, or you will suffer. And when you will feel low, you will have bad day, or whatever.. you might relapse.

Another good point. And it is connected again with your time here. It's good if you reach month, or week if you are starting. That's great. But, if you are counting every day, every hour.. you are making it just worse for you. Because you are still attached to this habit. Bad way. Find some hobby, no.. find something which gives you higher sense - and go for it. You shouldn't just strech your will, you should better turn to something more important and this will just fade away naturally after some time. Moreover, masturbation won't be the thing, which makes the world colorful anymore. It will be your new goal.

Thanks again for a great post. I've found some useful points for myself as well.
Man up, guys. We will make it.

 

I've read similar articles on focussing on the wrong thing. However, I believe we are all different and handle our addiction/recovery in different ways.
It's subjective so what works for one person may not work for another... good luck on your journey

 

Thanks for the wonderful insights. So much wisdom in there!

 

Outstanding! These are things I’ve come to realize myself. I agree 100% with your post.

Thanks!

 

Great post brother!!!

I totally agree with what you said. Fill yourself with activities, like exercise, gym, reading, meditation...etc.

Once you're that, you're sure tired and no thinking about fapping.

 

It's important thing but careful, it's not only about tiredness in my opinion. Because you cannot exhaust yourself 24/7 - there will be oportunity to break your decision. What's more important is commitment to these activities. You won't masturbate because you don't need it to your hapiness. Maybe some of you don't agree, but this difference is crucial in my opinion. It's not about doing anything to stop masturbate. It's more about starting something meaningfull, so you will just stop this habit because it won't have any value for you anymore.

But I am open to disscusion about this, of course.

EDIT: Altough I agree that tiredness helps as well.

 

Outstanding article my friend
The whole article is absolutely true especially the point of counting days is 100% true very inspirational please keep posting like this and help us. I just relapsed today after a 23 days no PM and now iam Going to start hard mode (no PMO). Which mode did you follow hard or normal.

 

I totally agree with this. Pmo give us pleasure, yet make you get painful later. Therefore, if there is something which can give us pleasure, we can just forget pmo naturally and focus on the new pleasure. However, the question is what is that?

 

Well, I am afraid that I cannot advice. This will be very specific for everyone of us. You have to search on your own. It just has to be something of profound importance for you. If you are interested more in my point of view on this, check my first post at this forum. You might find it useful. I don't have more to say at the moment - I would just saying the same again.

 

This is a good point. I was thinking about this issue. What if I can't do the wall climbing? What if I can't travel? What if I'm stuck at home for some reason?

I've a couple hobbies I can do at home that are better then porning and fapping. I haven't done them as much lately because I've been concentrating on getting out of the house. But I enjoy them and will return to them at some point.

I can also read the books that I've started and sit unfinished. I can do my writing (non-erotic). We need to find happiness and fulfillment in several healthy things. In case we are unable to do one, we can do another.

 

I couldn’t agree more. This has been my experience as well.

Will power fails eventually because an addict can’t stop when they start and can’t stay stopped when they stop. So no use fighting that phenomena.

Only after I stopped fighting PMO and started focusing on healing myself physically and mentally (in many different ways) did PMO become a memory rather than a craving or urge.

Glad to see someone else explain this. The more this gets discussed I think the more a formula for long term sobriety gets hammered out.

 

YEs. You have to start to do something meaningful that it will become a habit.I totally agree, that's why I said exercise, gym, swimming, reading book, meditation...etc. Even join a meetup group with a total stranger, which is putting you out of your comfort zone is enough for you to not thinking about fapping.

 

Brilliantly well said man...

 

Hello Timmy,
You are right. And a great post to noobies like us. Sure we should follow this. Thank you for sharing your experience and failures with us.

 

Very well written. Hats off. Thank you for thinking and sharing other side of the coin.