please help with fantasizing

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by KoalaDude, Mar 24, 2015.

  1. KoalaDude

    KoalaDude Fapstronaut

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    I've been able to astain from P and M for a few weeks now but I still can't seem to rid myself from fantasizing.
    I've always had vivid imaginations and can make and play movies in my head if I wish to. (I played with toys up until middle school because of this lol)
    I know fantasizing is bad but the fantasies I'm having aren't some typical objectification of women or carrying out some sick fetish.
    They are usually of people that don't exist in real life, and are a happily married couple making passionate love.
    I guess thats what I ultimately want, but I fear this will break me and my streak sooner or later so I need some advice to deal with this matter.

    Thanks guys.
     
  2. heyitshannes

    heyitshannes Fapstronaut

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    Keep your mind active with other things. Get a hobby, read, learn a new skill. Anything that keeps you busy and your mind occupied.
     
  3. DChan

    DChan Fapstronaut

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    I am on just the beginning but I am already getting my imagination worked up. If anything this is a good thing because youre mind is being able to create natural images instead of P. So it might be part of the rehabilitation process. Never the less, try to keep yourself busy and the images will go away. Bless !
     
  4. KoalaDude

    KoalaDude Fapstronaut

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    My days are quiet filled with activity, it happens when I'm in bed at night off to sleep to be more specific.
     
  5. The Eleven

    The Eleven Fapstronaut

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    Have you tried meditation? It will enhance your ability to recognize when you are starting to fantasize and to step back and let that impulse pass before it leads you down the wrong road.
     
  6. Thanatos

    Thanatos Fapstronaut

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    My thought process for lessening fantasy's right now goes like this:
    Fantasy comes into my mind; I notice it I think that's nice, but what does it give me?
    The anwser is nothing, and I find something else to do and that has been it so far.
    But I haven't had a really strong fanatasy in awhile.
     
  7. KoalaDude

    KoalaDude Fapstronaut

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    Thanks Thanatos,

    I've actively asked the question you suggested "What does it give me?" when my fantasy formed in my head.
    It's really giving it a another perspective in telling the fantasy that they serve no purpose but only to hold me back.
    I'll keep trying!
     
  8. steez

    steez Fapstronaut

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    I can also recommend mediation for dealing with intrusive thoughts.
     
  9. NeedAChange

    NeedAChange Fapstronaut

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    Yeah, that's a good way of helping. Have been finding myself slipping into fantasy mode a few times recently and combated it the same way as you.
     
  10. scooter

    scooter Fapstronaut

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    One day since pmo
     
  11. scooter

    scooter Fapstronaut

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    I think ima cum in my pants if i dream wet is that ok?
     
  12. willem20

    willem20 Fapstronaut

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    I like the way you rationalize your fantasies, but I think the best answer alreayd has been given, and that is meditation.

    When I started NoFap I tried to abstain PMO fully, which always ended in me giving in and losing because of fantasies.
    Fast forward to years in which I did MO but tried to asbtain from P, and in which I've started meditation. I've truly improved the way I can control my thoughts, and stop fantasizing. Meditation helps in the long term.
     
  13. Ankur Sharma

    Ankur Sharma Guest

    let them come, it will automatically go away after few days, for me it was something around 22-23 days (my previous attempt of reboot), the only thing you have to do is dont touch yourself, dont move your hand, dont open your laptop/mobile for porn.

    try meditation, cold shower, exercise
     
  14. Buzzltyr

    Buzzltyr Fapstronaut

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    Question: What about fantasies/memories of previous, REAL, sexual encounters? Should I try to cut those out of my mind as well?
     
  15. Antenor38

    Antenor38 Fapstronaut

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    It's very hard to fight fantasies, but my life is so much better when I fight them off. When I don't fight them off then I automatically become less relaxed when around opposite sex (even if I didn't PM for some time). I didn't think that fantasies alone can have that kind of effect, but it seems they do have.
    But when I fight them off, I have no problem with anybody.
    I just feel so clean and worthy when I don't have this 'little secret' going on in my head.

    God bless
     
  16. SerpentEagleHeart

    SerpentEagleHeart Fapstronaut

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    I've found, as well as meditation, also immediately refocusing the mind on something else helps.

    For example, you realise you're fantasising. Then you refocus to something else you want to think about. For me, it is my work. For you it could be anything you choose!

    Good luck!
     
  17. The Eleven

    The Eleven Fapstronaut

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    If you're looking to refrain from MO, then I don't think any sort of fantasy is likely to be helpful to you. I think you need to come up with a strategy for redirecting your focus whenever a fantasy or potential trigger presents itself to you.
     

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