mefistofelesjazzblack
New Fapstronaut
I had been in a streak of progress for more and less 3 months, since december until february. But is seems like at the begginng of this month, I have now returned completely to my old habits. It started with sexy images in social media and soft core hollywood-movie sex. Then I started to look for naked pictures of women on the internet. After that, my cravings got stronger, so I searched for GIFs of "romantic porn" (so I didn't feel bad about myself). Of course, after some days, I succumb enterily and started to search for videos, actresses, types, categories and so on and so forth. I have been on that plan for at least a week.
To overcome it, I have done some things:
1) I've written my goals, internal motivation and steps to take when I have a craving.
2) I've recorded myself with very similar content than the written one.
3) I've installed an App in Google Chrome to stop me from getting in any site related to sexual stimuli.
The thing is that, all measures have obstacles that prevent progress. The first two have the disadvantage that I only read and listen to myself saying I shouldn't look at porn or masturbate AFTER I have looked at porn or masturbated. I CANNOT link the idea of the craving and the act of reading or listening to myself, rather than the idea of craving=sexual overstimulation. I hope you can come up with some answers for me on this, I will apreciate it.
For the third measure the problem is that the rest of my family surf the internet through the Unknown mode, which makes the activation of the app imposible in this scenario. Thus, I go in in this mode and watch what I can't watch in the normal mode.
I don't know if I should take more radical measures than the ones I have already taken, like off line for a long time. I am also aware that I have associated the computer with porn, and the bathroom and shower with masturbation. Tomorrow I will not be able to look at PM because of college schedules, Will I so desperately try hold on to this futile stimuli? Will I be stronger than my craving just like Francis Dollarhyde was stronger than the Great Red Dragon? Or will my dragon climb my back and stay there for so long, that after some time my whole self will be the dragon? I don't really know. I would like to know your thoughts on the matter.
Thanks for taking the time to read this, it means a lot.
To overcome it, I have done some things:
1) I've written my goals, internal motivation and steps to take when I have a craving.
2) I've recorded myself with very similar content than the written one.
3) I've installed an App in Google Chrome to stop me from getting in any site related to sexual stimuli.
The thing is that, all measures have obstacles that prevent progress. The first two have the disadvantage that I only read and listen to myself saying I shouldn't look at porn or masturbate AFTER I have looked at porn or masturbated. I CANNOT link the idea of the craving and the act of reading or listening to myself, rather than the idea of craving=sexual overstimulation. I hope you can come up with some answers for me on this, I will apreciate it.
For the third measure the problem is that the rest of my family surf the internet through the Unknown mode, which makes the activation of the app imposible in this scenario. Thus, I go in in this mode and watch what I can't watch in the normal mode.
I don't know if I should take more radical measures than the ones I have already taken, like off line for a long time. I am also aware that I have associated the computer with porn, and the bathroom and shower with masturbation. Tomorrow I will not be able to look at PM because of college schedules, Will I so desperately try hold on to this futile stimuli? Will I be stronger than my craving just like Francis Dollarhyde was stronger than the Great Red Dragon? Or will my dragon climb my back and stay there for so long, that after some time my whole self will be the dragon? I don't really know. I would like to know your thoughts on the matter.
Thanks for taking the time to read this, it means a lot.