Day 19 Today alright but I felt better yesterday. I'm not too bad. I might hit the gym after I write this or read up some more information here in the forums or do something else. Yesterday, there was a new good looking lady including the body. Not sure about the face but it was ok. I didn't get a good look because I was looking away since it can be triggering. Same attractive woman with her friend & boyfriend from Day 7. I guess there they will be there every so often. Maybe even more. Damn she is attractive to look at it. Apparently, I heard there was another woman but she is married that started showing up. I never saw her for awhile but I heard from the front desk guy telling she is showing up as well. Hmm for some reason I am not attracted to her when I look at her. I don't know why. Her body is pretty nice and somewhat slim but I am not attracted to her. I have been wondering something about women, do women became less attractive when they MO or have sex? If anyone can answer this. Because I heard one man's point of view, you become less attractive when you release your semen through masturbation & watch porn or during sex. Basically, if a man practice PMO then they become less attractive. Maybe that is why I might not be attracted to her because her and everyone is releasing their energy (orgasm). I think I am slowly becoming attractive because of this no PMO journey. I think people especially woman might sense it a little more. As in for women in Star Wars terms, there are "force sensitive" to these things. More spiritual than Men per say. But I still need to go on longer to see the effects though. Seeing SR/NoFap videos on Youtube for inspiration and it is helping me. Urges, not many with the exception in the end. Upon waking up, I had a dream about woman that I know of. I think it would have became a sexual dream if it went further because I saw myself touching her. Hmm maybe would have been a wet dream. Ironically, no pornographic images in my mind. Before heading to bed, I came across woman online then suddenly I started to get hard. I became hard for her and I think I would have relapsed if I let it. It might have been enough to do the deed. I think it was due to water in my system. If you notice, if you have enough water in your system you can get horny from that condition. But I went to the bathroom and my hard on subsided but I still want to have sex. I believe it came back though and I went to bed with a hard on. Nope, I resisted. This is still worth the effort. I can talk more about this in another time but this is relative in other aspects in life. Not easy and you earn this. All I have to say is fight! Just my advice when urges come. I will repeat over and over again. I am embracing it when it does happen for me. Keep training!
im back, i get beat down by this adicction and i feel like nofap wasnt important, that i should live with out it but now i know that i was wrong. the last days of my streak i was feeling a bad energy that direct me to give up the challenge. now after a week or two i get that nofap is the right course and i should keep going, im sorry to disapear like this, now i am back and i will do it better than the last time
Welcome back. We all make mistakes, the key is to accept it, learn from the mistake and strive to improve. I'm sure you'll do even better this time.
Day 20 Woke up with 7 hours of sleep. Not bad. Skipped the gym and hitting the gym later. Will try to read on here or something today. Urges, not really many. But it happened again like yesterday. I came across a woman's social media page. As I was looking, all of her content was completely normal. But her last post was her wearing oversized t-shirt and her bottoms was exposed (not nude). Everything is normal but she had to throw in a sexy photo of herself. Very strange. Because of that I ended up getting a hard on from that. I wanted to sex now. Nope, I still resisted. Success. Every day, I have to practice patience because I am impatient. Maybe being in SR/NoFap/No PMO made me a little more impatient. I have a long way to go. Fighting this war. Keeping Training!
That's fine, friend! It's all part of the training, and failure is the greatest teacher we can have. Stay focused!
Day 22 Urges were light. Stopped at a 4 way section with my car. I saw an attractive woman crossing and I want to stare but I was waiting on the green light. Temptation overall was kind of pathetic to be honest. I will take it as a win. Lastly, I regret it now. I regret all my PMO. I regret why haven't started this journey early on or have known the effects were real when I joined here. Just my thoughts. Now waiting what will the day will hold. The darkside was weak today. Nothing more. Keep Training!
