Trouble with girls

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by LGR44, Feb 21, 2017.

  1. LGR44

    LGR44 Fapstronaut

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    So ive been trying to reboot ever since I got dumped in November for being too needy. Im 17. I had PIED with my gf who was so hot and it sucked. Now I'm on day 9 of no PMO (longest streak yet, determined to keep it going), experiencing a flatline. Not to sound arrogant but I am good looking and some what good with girls. Lately ive been flirting alot with a girl from my old school and the other night we were at a small party together and she was all over me. I feel like a pussy because I didnt make a move because I was nervous I wouldnt get a boner. She's not the kind of girl to just have sex like that, but I was worried that hooking up might lead to a bj, where I would likely embarrass myself. Should I try to just kiss her? Also my ex girlfriend has told my friends that she misses me. I planned to wait a month of no PMO before contacting her, but I realized that she's not gonna wait around for me forever. Last night I contacted her and we flirted a little bit over text. I asked her if she wanted to hang out and she said definetly. She wanted to hang today because she didnt have school, but I couldnt becasue I did. I told her that we could figure it out later this week. If we do still like eachother, I want to tell her that I have figured out what my problem is. While we were dating I could never cum from sex or head no matter what, and often (it got worse as time passed) lost errections quickly, but we both didnt know what was causing it. A couple times I couldnt even get hard for sex. I was watching porn and jerking off while we were dating. So if we are flirting and start kissing or something, I dont want it to go farther yet because of my problem. I want to show her that Ive changed (fixed my problem). Im in a tough place because I had to text her soon because shes hot and one day someone else will get her if I dont, so I couldnt really wait any longer to fix my PIED. I feel like If I told her about my problem, she might just think that she needs to find another guy without this. What if she just wants to hookup? On the other hand if we still have a real emotional connection, maybe in a perfect world she would be with me while I fixed my problem. Or maybe I could just avoid talking to her about it and tell her I want to take things slowly. Sorry to write so much, please respond and share your thoughts.
     
    TetsuoAkira likes this.
  2. Geductive

    Geductive Fapstronaut

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    Hey man, Reading your text I kind of saw My reflection in a mirror.

    I am also pretty Handsome, attractive and good with girls, But always got scared when being at a Party to leave with someone for a ons, until I realized hooking up with someone I don't Know or Else is just Not My style and I wouldnt enjoy it.

    The word Rewirring already implements setting new connections up and not only destroying others. Therefore a girlfriend wouldnt Be such a stupid idea. I would suggest you take it slow at First though. Try to Not create sexual tension, but intimacy.

    I have to admit, that D. J was giving me this advise in My thread as well, But I wholeheartly support his thoughts.

    Good Luck!
     
  3. statefarm

    statefarm New Fapstronaut

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    You still have a lot to learn. It sounds like you value her a lot more than yourself.

    Make her put in all of the work to get you back and don't worry about the consequences.

    a.) You're buying time (to further fix your PIED problem)
    b.) You don't look pathetic

    Don't think of it as "she's so hot, I want her back sooooo bad, I'm not good enough for her"

    She's nobody, she fucked you over and think she can just come back into your life whenever she wants... wrong.
     
  4. Chef Boy

    Chef Boy Fapstronaut

    Best advice. I'd also add; fix the problem...never fap again. Surely what it's turned you into disgusts you to your core.
     
    LGR44 likes this.
  5. LGR44

    LGR44 Fapstronaut

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    I dont look pathetic at all she dumped me (I broke up with her basically because she was too nice to say it to me) and I didnt reach out to her for 3 months. We broke up on good terms and nothing hurtfull was said. It was my first girlfriend and I thought being as nice and loving as possible would make her happy. Obviously I was wrong because you cant be too nice of a guy. She told my me that she missed me and I didnt reply. She was the last one to reach out to me, and I ended that conversation too, and since the break up I have turned things around (she no longer has the upper hand). And I dont really care how hot she is, I only said that to mean that she turned me on and I should have been able to have sex with her. Its the connection we had that I value. Also buying more time is just giving other guys time to have a chance with her. No girl is gonna wait around for someone forever. I definetly have alot to learn though. To be honest somedays I think I want her back and others I dont.
     
  6. avatarivn

    avatarivn Fapstronaut

    @LGR44 I think you are looking at the whole matter from the wrong angle. You worried about her looking at other guys? Work on yourself so she looks at the best possible version you have to offer. You want an emotional connection? then don't let the first thought be "She is so hot" and realize that looks come and go but personality and companionship takes longer to die. You want to be certain you will have an erection? then quit PMO and never, ever come back to it.
     
  7. LGR44

    LGR44 Fapstronaut

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    Im working on myself but the reason im worried that she will get another guy is because I dont go to school with her and I never see her because I ignore her. Ive said this 5 times but I only said she's "so hot" to show that I was turned on by her and should have been able to bang her had i not had pied. She was my best friend when we dated and from the day that I met her we had the strongest emotional connection I have ever shared with someone
     

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