(UPDATE) 400 Days (1+ Year) Free of PMO & Transforming Into A New Man

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Update:

As of yesterday, I have surpassed 200 days in a row of abstaining from PMO.

While the streak has continued to be on a roll, lately, the temptation to return to the old habits has been tormenting me. I have been able to restrain myself from resetting and relapsing, but it has not been the easiest time for me.

In addition, lately, I have not been able to sleep properly during the night, and I frequently toss and turn while trying to fall asleep. The past 2 weeks, I have truly been feeling like I am on the verge of a major mental breakdown. The thoughts in my mind tormenting me, mood swings from sadness and depression to anger and violent thoughts, and wanting to be left alone and not bothered by anyone with anything, I have been feeling like I am about to lose it. It has even reached a point of me losing appetite a lot of the time and not wanting to eat supper.

Hopefully better days are ahead for myself.
 
Keep going man! Thats what life actually is. Everyone wants that perfect feeling and that it nevers stops but dont realise that if not for bad days, we cant cherish and enjoy good days and moments. Everybody is surrounded by idiots nowadays who take positivity from you so its important to distance yourself from that and find a space that does not include that.
 
Thank you for sharing your journey. I have only just started back again on this path and I need to be as resilient as you are being. But it’s useful to see that there are always going to be testing and trying days. Yet there is hope. Thank you.
 
Keep on pushing through! The struggle you are feeling now is just another hill you must climb on your way to recovery and freedom. To read stories like this is truly motivating for us who is trying to accomplish the same. And that you will continue going strong and not falling back is important for a lot of us! Use this as a motivation to keep on going and holding yourself accountable. Stay hard brother!
 
Thanks for the story. I'm in the same situation you were in. Learned about PMO at 17 - still an addict at 27. Maybe it's still possible for me to break free.
 
Update:

I have surpassed 250 days of my NoFap journey. Over 8 months of being free of the PMO tentacles.

The further and further I go in my journey, I don't even think about how many days I have abstained from PMO. I just naturally do it, with no desire to go back to my previous state.

My sour moods have recently gone away, the relationship I am currently in has become more serious and committed, and my fitness journey keeps going. Recently, I have also lost a lot of the excess weight I had on me, and feel more fit. A total of 30 pounds lost since last September.
 
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Just a simple update:

I have now bulldozed past 300 days of my combat mission to be free from the oppression of PMO addiction.

Not too much has changed since the last update. I am continuing on with fitness goals, and I don't even think much about the day count anymore. NoFap has truly become a lifestyle for me that I just do naturally without even thinking much about it. With the momentum still on a steady roll like this, it will be the 1 year NoFap anniversary and milestone for me very soon.
 
D.T.89 said:
Just a simple update:

I have now bulldozed past 300 days of my combat mission to be free from the oppression of PMO addiction.

Not too much has changed since the last update. I am continuing on with fitness goals, and I don't even think much about the day count anymore. NoFap has truly become a lifestyle for me that I just do naturally without even thinking much about it. With the momentum still on a steady roll like this, it will be the 1 year NoFap anniversary and milestone for me very soon.
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You inspire me to bounce back. I started my streak in October 2022 as well, but ultimately failed in June, and have struggled since. However, I am doing better now, closing in on 2 weeks for the first time since June.

I hope to be in a “natural NoFap state” where I don’t have to worry too hard about it anymore. Because of people like you I know it is possible for me too.
 
Update:

After what seemed like an eternity, I have surpassed one whole year of abstaining from PMO. Lots of ups and downs were experienced during the journey, but I still managed to persevere and keep the momentum going. While not an easy task to accomplish, with the right mindset, it can be done.
 
D.T.89 said:
Update:

After what seemed like an eternity, I have surpassed one whole year of abstaining from PMO. Lots of ups and downs were experienced during the journey, but I still managed to persevere and keep the momentum going. While not an easy task to accomplish, with the right mindset, it can be done.
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You're doing well yourself, keep it up! We are so close to each other in term of reboot days.

Congratulations into your 1 Year Journey!
 
LostSon267 said:
You inspire me to bounce back. I started my streak in October 2022 as well, but ultimately failed in June, and have struggled since. However, I am doing better now, closing in on 2 weeks for the first time since June.

I hope to be in a “natural NoFap state” where I don’t have to worry too hard about it anymore. Because of people like you I know it is possible for me too.
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One day at a time! Once you get inside the second month, you won't have to struggle so hard to
build clean days.
 
Update:

In my journey and mission to free myself of the PMO tentacles that were keeping me oppressed, I have now pushed past the 400 day mark.

As far as how I have been feeling lately, it has not been easy. Due to my line of work and the schedules I have, I have lately been feeling very lonely, in addition to having my anxiety noticeably increase. It is as if I am on edge all the time. During my sleep, I have been having consistent nightmares too, both weird ones that make no sense, and ones where my past and failed relationships have been haunting me. Other moments, when the flashbacks hit me, I become very depressed.

One of the things that will be realized in the NoFap journey, the anxiety and depression does not go away just by abstaining from PMO. In actuality, it can and will become more vivid, especially since PMO is not used as a distraction.

I still engage in fitness workouts, and that has not changed.
 
Update:

This update is in regards to my previous post in regards to what I have been mentally experiencing.

After analyzing the symptoms that I have been having (depression, mood swings, having a hard time falling asleep), and getting an outside perspective, it is now certain that I have a bipolar disorder. Having abstained from PMO for this long and not using it to numb what I feel on the inside, the vividness of my symptoms has now opened up my eyes to myself having this condition.
 
D.T.89 said:
Update:

This update is in regards to my previous post in regards to what I have been mentally experiencing.

After analyzing the symptoms that I have been having (depression, mood swings, having a hard time falling asleep), and getting an outside perspective, it is now certain that I have a bipolar disorder. Having abstained from PMO for this long and not using it to numb what I feel on the inside, the vividness of my symptoms has now opened up my eyes to myself having this condition.
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I'm quite curious what makes you say that. I do feel that it's very easy to categorise ourselves into these buckets sometimes without really understanding the underlying conditions that actually cause some of our mood swings. Something my therapist recently told me is that if its something you haven't consistently experienced or if there are days when you have actually felt good about yourself and not dealt with the swings of emotions, its most likely not clinical bi polar.

I too have been diagnosed AD & Bi Polar and had been subscribed medications. But I have found that my good days are so in sync with the typical days like 9 to 14 day or 21 to 25 day period that is takes of no PMO beyond which my symptoms get better.

Is it just a messy brain space that is causing you to think the same? curious to know your thoughts.
 
D.T.89 said:
Update:

This update is in regards to my previous post in regards to what I have been mentally experiencing.

After analyzing the symptoms that I have been having (depression, mood swings, having a hard time falling asleep), and getting an outside perspective, it is now certain that I have a bipolar disorder. Having abstained from PMO for this long and not using it to numb what I feel on the inside, the vividness of my symptoms has now opened up my eyes to myself having this condition.
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I felt like totally shit when i went too long on nofap. If you can not transmute the energy, it gets stuck or something. It was freaky.

Now i do nofap for like 3 weeks and "relapse" with love of my future wife in mind.

Just a perspective. It might be the long nofap streak thats messing with you - It can become a destructive obsession, the body and mind need the stress release from O.

Peace
 
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rave.flower said:
I'm quite curious what makes you say that. I do feel that it's very easy to categorise ourselves into these buckets sometimes without really understanding the underlying conditions that actually cause some of our mood swings. Something my therapist recently told me is that if its something you haven't consistently experienced or if there are days when you have actually felt good about yourself and not dealt with the swings of emotions, its most likely not clinical bi polar.

I too have been diagnosed AD & Bi Polar and had been subscribed medications. But I have found that my good days are so in sync with the typical days like 9 to 14 day or 21 to 25 day period that is takes of no PMO beyond which my symptoms get better.

Is it just a messy brain space that is causing you to think the same? curious to know your thoughts.
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My symptoms have now started appearing consistently. For the past month, I been having them on a regular basis. Especially the extreme mood swings and having a hard time falling asleep. What adds fuel to the fire is that I work as a bus driver in a very major metropolitan area, dealing with the worst kind of public that you can imagine, with the work environment being known for contributing to health issues, both physical and mental.
 
D.T.89 said:
My symptoms have now started appearing consistently. For the past month, I been having them on a regular basis. Especially the extreme mood swings and having a hard time falling asleep. What adds fuel to the fire is that I work as a bus driver in a very major metropolitan area, dealing with the worst kind of public that you can imagine, with the work environment being known for contributing to health issues, both physical and mental.
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I'm no doctor so I can't really give you any advice. But please be vary of either being self diagnosed or medically diagnosed with such things as I sometimes feel that doctors or allopathy in a way can throw these terms quite loosely to put you on medications without knowing the underlying causes of the same. And some of these medications sometimes have long term side effects which I'm pretty sure you've read or come across. I'm not averse to taking medications myself to deal with the same if I really require it, and neither should you. But you need to really really know that it is the case before you pump your body with any meds, cause these meds that are used to treat things like bipolar will not just affect your mindspace but the functioning of the rest of your body as well.

Try and maintain a log and everytime you start feeling the worst of it or find your self reacting badly or may be even having a great day, put a score to it on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the worst you are feeling and see if you can find patterns. Share them with me and we can compare. There will be days you miss logging and that is fine. But its easy to really understand and see whats going on or even present this information to a doctor when required.

I am looking at something like ayurveda to help reduce the intensity of these swings. Cause I think the goal is to learn how to regulate your moods naturally. I dont have answers for you as of now. I'll update incase I do find relief from the same. But hold on to your sobriety mate. It's not worth slipping back to your former self. Keep the faith. drop a message if you need support!! We are all in this together :)
 
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