Why would most guys not even consider giving up their technical devices to get over porn addiction?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by skaterdrew, Jun 1, 2020.

  1. Thecolonel

    Thecolonel Fapstronaut

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    awesome thread, and very fruitful argument, I guess as summer son puts it
    different methods may or may not work for everyone. Just try different methods and decide for yourself. For me, I was able to decrease my internet usage time but i could not cut it completely. It is a significant platform for my education during the lock-down and i stay connected with my friends. I significantly decreased my aimless surfing on the internet like watching random staff on Youtube, Twitter and Instagram, where you'd probably stumble on some intriguing images. However, I tried desensitizing those stimuli by reacting differently to them and conditioned myself not to behave in reaction to seeing beautiful models or thinking about explicit staff, I read about this process on YBOP and is quite risky. it led me to relapse last year but I guess nowadays I started following activists who criticize porn as a trafficking industry and abusing people, including minors and people who have not consented to be filmed. I started seeing the real colors of this embellished human objectification, I became empathetic to the porn users as well as the models. I started seeing it as morally inappropriate and I started realizing that normal relationships with real-life partners is far better than this lonely tunnel leading to nowhere, but misery, anxiety and loneliness. whenever, I get an urge I start imagining what may happen afterwards, will I edge and keep on, then what ?, I started realizing that the pleasure is just short-term and therefore i became more rational. Whatever method you have inserted to block websites you'll be able to bypass it, we become so creative and smart to break those barriers, some may even find pleasure by escaping those challenges.
     
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  2. I'm curious why didn't using porn blockers help you? What kind did you use? I'm using an app called Detoxify for my phone and its works really well. I cant change the setting without a pin and the pin was randomly selected by the app so I don't know it. I can request to change my pin but it will take 24 hours.
     
    Roady likes this.
  3. I've done/do a lot of the things you mention. Hadn't thought of grayscaling, though, so just took a minute to adjust the brightness/contrast/colour settings on my monitor. It's a lot less bright now, even if it's not true grayscale. I can feel my eyes adjusting - thanks for the tip! Will need to DDG 'before launcher'...
     
  4. Summer Son

    Summer Son Fapstronaut

    Because porn blockers create a lot of pressure on me, also when I put a blocker on my any device, it blocks some kind of webpages like YBOP or other unrelated websites. Porn addiction is also internet addiction, it is 'arousal' addiction and that's why I put some tools that I have mentioned. I fixed my devices as boring as possible especially when I am surfing on the net which I try to use more controllable behaviour if I do.
     
  5. My porn blocker is specifically for porn so it almost never blocks unrelated sites unless you include escort sites. Not sure what you mean by it creating a lot pressure for you but wouldn't that be a good thing?
     
  6. thisIsthelastDay

    thisIsthelastDay New Fapstronaut

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    What porn blocker you use brother? Once I used k9. That helped a lot. But k9 is not exist anymore
     
  7. I use Detoxify for android.
     
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  8. OhWhenThe

    OhWhenThe Fapstronaut

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    I'm actually going to try this, one week no internet(or phones/tv) starting from tomorrow.

    Obviously that's only short-term compared to the time needed to reboot but we'll see how it goes. It's not like I really do anything constructive online anyway tbh and I think it'll do me good to take a break.
     
  9. This is an interesting topic.
    I've made a long road trip out of my addiction and I'm still falling for the seduction from time to time.
    I've put internet out of my house years ago for a year and that was actually a very good time.
    Nowadays I definitely need it to run my company and so to earn my bucks.

    I was able to stay 100 days clean pure on will power. But sooner or later the moment came that I started watching again.
    I tried all kind of filters and blockers but as an IT specialist, it was a little challenge to find the bypass in the filter.

    My opinion is that it's wise to amputate the things that brings you to fall.
    The bible says: if your eye brings you to sin, pull it out and throw it away.
    I need to remove every possibility that can bring me to sin again. For that reason I stopped watching television 15 years ago and I 'm perfectly fine with it today.

    Last year I was done with the crappy filter software and decided to develop an own little blocking system by simply put my modem + extra router in an metal case with a lock. I put the key in a payed external locker so I have to leave my home to get the key. The extra router gives me the certainty that I cannot login into the modem or reset the password of the modem. The password on the router is random made, and is stored into the metal box. The router gives me also the possibility to create a list of words and urls to filter. It works actually excellent.
    I described it here.

    Last week I finally put a blocker app on my smartphone. Detoxify. Thanks for this tip. It works great for me.

    Sometimes I have to admit that I can't do certain things on will power. Maybe I will need all these tricks to protect me for the rest of my life. So what? If that brings me the peace and productive and loving life I'm longing for, it's perfectly oke for me. I'm sure my future wife will respect me for the honesty and will power I put on my solutions in stead of that I'm still trying to prove myself that I can beat the addiction on pure will power.

    As long as the door is open, you will feel the wind (the seduction) blowing. Shut the door and the inside atmosphere will be much nicer!
    As soon as I close that doors I feel much more peaceful in my house!
     
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  10. Leader of ME

    Leader of ME Fapstronaut

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    Amen .
     
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  11. RogerFM

    RogerFM Fapstronaut

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    Well, I work with IT, so, yeah, good luck getting rid of electronic devices when you need them for work.

    Plus. I don't, the problem with fapping and different from all other addictions is that you ALWAYS have the most important gear with you all the time, unless you have a detachable dick, if you do, please tell me how... Only joking really. But, well, even without eletronics, lets say you go outside and see a really really good looking woman?

    But, Yeah, I totally agree, if you are not dependent from electronic devices, get rid of them.
     
  12. Christian Man

    Christian Man Fapstronaut

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    some of your struggles resonate with me Roady.
    i empathize with your efforts. i will remember you and other men on this site and to pray for daily deliverence and be shaped into His image.

    in my practise of sobriety , i needed to practise my 'fire alarm' drill with another christian guy.
    'i looked at porn today.' actually, i didn't that was only a drill.

    the idea behind a fire alarm drill is to be able to say without hesitation and keeping any secret thoughts that i'm having trouble or i'm doing stuff that hurts and erodes my sobriety.

    i used to do this fire alarm drill with an accountability partner in person. after 3 years, he got busy by being accepted as a deacon for a church - huge responsibilities in caring for the church.

    i need someone else to do those fire alarm drills now, on a regular monthly basis.
    thanks for listening Roady.
     
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  13. As much we would like to believe the contrary, "our willpower is limited"("The willpower instinct" - Kelly McGonigal). I really wish we were that rational and virtuous as to give up our vices since we consider them harmful, but certain external factors (fatigue, sadness, frustration etc.) that appear from other day-to-day sources do not allow us to do such. If you're trying to quit sugar and you suddenly get angry or extremely tired, you are much more likely to grab a snack than in the morning after the coffee effects hits in.

    It is then suggested to make "getting the sugar" as difficult as possible, so if you're trying to quit, there should be no sugar around that you could easily consume. This sounds like common sense, yet we often fail to apply the exact same principle in different domains in our lives.

    Yes, giving up electronic devices or (very heavily) restricting them would be great, since whenever urges hit it would be too difficult for you to get to porn and in the meantime you will reconsider your decisions. However giving them may not be optional since we need them for work/socializing/scheduling etc. and heavy restrictions can still be avoided like obstacles ( because of the hundreds of porn sites out there). I recommend you try to do something in this aspect, but it is a lot more complicated than throwing all the sugar in the bin.
     
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  14. leetspeak

    leetspeak Fapstronaut

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    I really wish Detoxify existed for desktops and laptops.
     
  15. RogerFM

    RogerFM Fapstronaut

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    I mean, I learned about fasting, ketosis, a lot of best exercises to do at home with the pandemic, I use devices to invest in the market AND learned about nofap with a device... The same device that ruined almost ruined my with games.

    They are just tools these gadgets, blame your use of them, not the tools themselves. I think they do wonders for learning for instance.
     
  16. flor3334

    flor3334 Fapstronaut

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    I have been without internet for 1,5 years when on 25th August 2018 for the last time I went to this horrible site and this really was the last option I had, and it was neccessary. So had two periods of 8 - 9 months free from porn and now have internet again for 2,5 month. It started out well, but unfortunately I am back into porn, but not the really bad stuff.
    So yeah, if it must, going without Internet is possible. Today I DECIDED to fight this bad habit once again HARD. Will this habit be stronger then me, then I will not hesitate: Bye bye internet!!!
     
  17. I was hoping I would come up on something like this in the forums, I messed up after a long time. I always used to use an old ipod touch to look up P but today I destroyed it and I'm genuinely curious as to what kind of blockers I can use for the phone... or the computer. I always used to imagine destroying that device because it was used for nefarious purposes. I would have thought I'd feel awful for smashing it up but I feel so relieved. I'm done being sorry every time I relapse, I'm going to be better and take twice as many cold showers or whatever other precautions it may take!
     
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  18. Christian Man

    Christian Man Fapstronaut

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    you're doing the right thing to get well ! Stay at it.
    i've been there and i'm on the journey of sobriety for my own wellness, to keep my marriage with my beautiful wife and enjoy the life with my 2 kids. This is what's worth fighting for !
     
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  19. flor3334

    flor3334 Fapstronaut

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    Man, I can relate to that one. Great thread this is. Have to go to work now, but will be into it later.
     
    Roady likes this.
  20. Christian Man

    Christian Man Fapstronaut

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    Fight the fight. The porn industry would have our souls, like the cigarette co's in the 60s who claimed smoking was healthy for you. Choose today to be sober. Stay the course. We want to be saved men, free from bondage, alive to wellness again. We want our lives back, normalcy. Porn has robbed us of years, opportunities, money. It has damaged relationships. Be free, stay free. Care about your choice, we can heal our minds and bodies. It's working, keep on going. Resources: Your Brain on Porn
     
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