Willpower and Blockers

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I just relapsed yesterday. It shouldn't have happened in the first place.

I already know from the beginning that no blocker will be 100% effective in preventing me from seeing porn. All of them could be turned off easily with a switch, which is exactly what happened to me yesterday.

There are more than 200 websites on my block list. I recently found out there's a switch to turn off the blocker, making all of these websites accessible. FYI, the blocker is in my Android phone, since I usually use my phone to see porn. It could be synchronized with the desktop version.

I already installed a productivity app that prevents me from opening the blocker app in the first place. But even then, I could easily turn it off.

I know the answer lies in my willpower. I did struggle with myself when I'm going to turn off the blockers. So it's definitely already there. I just need to make it stronger.
 
Yep that's pretty much the right answer. I just recently completed my first 90 days ever, never using a blocker of any kind. I could've pulled out my phone and started a relapse in seconds, hundreds of times over, but the only true porn blocker is between your ears.
But I don't think raw willpower is the right way to look at it. You'll wear yourself out fast doing that. What you really need are mental habits that simply redirect that triggering energy into something else, and those grow stronger with repetition.
 
randomname3 said:
Yep that's pretty much the right answer. I just recently completed my first 90 days ever, never using a blocker of any kind. I could've pulled out my phone and started a relapse in seconds, hundreds of times over, but the only true porn blocker is between your ears.
But I don't think raw willpower is the right way to look at it. You'll wear yourself out fast doing that. What you really need are mental habits that simply redirect that triggering energy into something else, and those grow stronger with repetition.
Click to expand...

What activities did you do in redirecting that energy, if I may ask?
 
I agree with your post.

For a long time, I was an advocat for blockers on the forums. But eventually I realized, that no blocker on earth is bulletproof. There is always a way around it. When I was craving porn, I would challenge myself to find the loophole. And I always did.

From that moment forward, I never used blockers again. I try to learn to control my behavior like a normal person would. It's sometimes hard, but I think it's the right way. Blockers are nothing more than a reminder of your goals. If you rely on blockers for success, you're just setting yourself up for failure.
 
Blockers can be a helpful deterrent, but by themselves they are not enough. And they cost money, which is a deterrent to their use. One of the things I think that makes the porn addiction so hard to quit is that there's very little economic cost. I have spent far more money over the years on therapy/blockers/tools for recovery than I ever have on porn.
 
Davekransberg said:
What activities did you do in redirecting that energy, if I may ask?
Click to expand...
First I set a specific date I had to go until. That invalidates the urge to 'restart fresh' or quit after an arbitrary 'big number' of days.
Whenever I felt triggered, I'd mentally chant that 'until' date to redirect that energy.
Then I learned it really is possible to refuse to ever look or think on anything in lust (until the time is right).
And the rest was just paying closer attention to my own personal demons to pursue personal improvement.
 
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