Post published by BakJo

I did a gradual step-down: First I quit P, then I quit MO, then I quit P-subs and any sort of sexual thinking. So, 100% cold turkey is not always the only way (although the purist in me still thinks that way would be fastest and best). However, actually scheduling MO seems like a bad idea, as it is granting yourself permission to an unhelpful habit. You are making it okay in a way by scheduling it, and this will ultimately be counter-productive. But, just my $0.02. I know others are less strict on MO than I am. I have just found that it inevitably leads me back to P -- so it must go!

I would say it is a bad idea because it can quickly become a slippery slope that sucks you back in. You essentially want it more because you know it is coming. Stick to the mindset that you will fight it until the end and that the next relapse will never come. You may relapse, but that would be your gradual step down.

This is so much an addiction problem after a while. It is a heart problem. Think about rat park. Rats in the presence of good community have no desire to use heroin laced water even when addicted to it. The thing that got me to 30 days so far has been the joy that awaits me for abstinence and the agony that awaits me from relapse. If your life is fulfilling and satisfying, you won't want PMO. You will want whatever you fill your void with. If you fill it with God, you will never be empty.

@frogs2345 Amen! Well said! For those interested to learn more about addiction and connection/fulfillment, check these out:

I dunno, I think each person is different. If you would have told me I could quit MO completely even as little as 5 years ago, I would have laughed at you. Now, not only do I know it's possible but I'm getting further with each attempt. That reality is only the latest point in a long journey spanning many years where, little by little, sexual purity gained ground in my life like a persistent army. I think its one of those things you have to discuss with the Lord and, most importantly, be honest about it when you do. Too easy to rationalize with this approach.

Brother i guess yall done know what am about to say bout yes there was no O invovled but yes touching and thinking!!

@Soulherb "I think its one of those things you have to discuss with the Lord and, most importantly, be honest about it when you do." That should always be our first response, and then we do well to listen to what he says and follow him where he leads. I was struck by the videos I shared when I first encountered them because it did help remove the stigma of addictive behavior and show me to show more grace to addicts (myself included). If they are not helpful to you, by all means discard them and stick with the truth of God!

@BakJo , I believe you posted a brilliant question and one that has probably crossed most Fapstronaut's minds at some point. I can only reinforce what has already been stated by others, and it's based on my almost 6 years of battling this. Engaging in P in any capacity is indeed a very slippery slope, and you're ultimately keeping the door open on Pandora's box. The main goal in complete abstinence is to weaken the reward pathways that PMO has created, not keep them on life support.

@Tao Jones Just to clarify, I was only responding to the original post, not the videos. We're on the same page.