Post published by Gods_princess

You are not worthless, you are God's creation. Flawed with man's sinful nature but you are trying to come to grips with that. You are fighting the good fight. Know it says that "you are wonderfully and powerfully made"... Sin exists to lead us to our savior... You admit your sinful nature and rest with Christ for your salvation in Fait, through His grace. Love you! Paul

Your words echo Romans 7. Maybe re-reading Romans 6-8 will be an encouragement to you? You are not the first to feel they are the chief of all sinners. How can those so wretched as we are be set free from sin and self and constantly turning towards pain and death?

Jesus is called the Divine Physician so you can rest assured that, like a good doctor, He positions Himself as close as possible to the most sick in order to bring them to healing and health. The other part of this doctor patient relationship is our openess to be lead by our good doctor. I mean if you were told by your doctor that you had a deadly peanut allergy, would go fill your house with peanut butter and make a sandwich? No, most certainly not. Rid you life and home of these novels and give them no place in your life.

Thanks for the encouragement. @Virginpaul, I needed to hear that sin exists to lead me to our savior.

@Tao Jones, I also thought about those words of Paul and really felt them in the moment after the relapse. Going back to sin is really like hurting yourself. I talked to my counselor about the parallel between PMO and self harm.

@Oremus, it’s been a novel on my smartphone. I got an ad on Facebook for it where I could read the beginning of the book and got hooked quickly as I read through the pages.

But I deleted this app.

@Gods_princess smartphones are so difficult...some times I call them sinphones because it's just so easy to sin with them. You might have to look into removing Facebook or installing a browser that works to eliminate ads and pictures. Maybe not forever but at least while you begin your journey. At the end of the day you have to ask which thing do you want more....access to Facebook or access to a healthy relationship with God? Yes, that sounds easier than done but it's possible to do and worth it.

Some of us have had to give up smart phones, at least for a period of time. We commit to doing whatever is required to get and stay free. Freedom will cost us something. It is worth any price.

@Gods_princess Throughout my youth I felt worthless until I met Christ. What a liberation that was! But before I met Christ, what a lonely place that was. I also know this well. I think that feelings of worthlessness and loneliness often go together. I heard someone preach "God doesn't make garbage and he doesn't make mistakes". You also are neither but are precious, one-of-a-kind, and loved by God as his Word says.We must unlearn our ideas of what love is because it is distorted by sin in the world and in us and learn what love is according to God. PMO, the erotic / sensuality, the occult (the devil) and the world distort love...

...I didn't know what love was, how to love myself in a healthy/godly way, and how to love until I met Christ. Let the Lord show you what love is. If you doubt his love, look at the cross, look at his hands and feet pierced for you. When there is a change of ruler (like a king or government), though the new ruler reigns and is in power, it may not be immediate to see or feel all the changes he effects he brings but it will come about. Jesus is the new ruler in your life. May his love reign in your heart - in our hearts - through the power of the cross. He promised if we abide in him we will see fruit, the effects of his reign in us. Praying 4 u.

Can't think of any worst sinner than me too!

I look back with disgust on the decades that I repeatedly committed the sin of lust and I am tempted to despondency, but that is not God's wish for me. Mary Magdalene repeatedly committed the sin of lust, but was cleansed by Jesus's clear message about God's incredible love and mercy. Ultimately, Mary Magdalene was granted the privilege to be the first to see Christ's empty tomb and witness His resurrection. What a gift! Christ came to call sinners. You are loved and cherished! Continue striving to show God love in return through obedience to His will and eventually you will achieve it.

Thanks for the encouragement! @need2beatpmo, I want to feel Gods love, too. I hear so many testimonials of Christians who felt this love but somehow I can't. I feel like if I slip up I loose God's favor- which is wrong thinking.

@Gods_princess I'm sure feelings of his love will come. But love is not based on our feelings or emotions. Those things are part of what make us human but they are fleeting. Our feelings can change so quickly. Love must be and is based on something that is not fleeting or temporary. Love is a decision to act despite if the other person is unlovely or doesn't "deserve" it. No one deserves God's love or grace. He loves us knowing who we are and he came to save us. Jesus came to save you. He knows all your actions and thoughts, past, present, and future. What you will do can't catch him by surprise. Leave your obstacles behind and come follow Jesus.

@Gods_princess If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness...My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous. 2 He is the propitiation for our sins, (1 John 1:9, 2:1-2) Also see Psalm 32, 51, 1 Peter 1:3-8 “By his divine power he has given us everything pertaining to life and godliness…” Be encouraged sister and keep you head up. Look to your Lord and Savior. You can overcome and we can overcome...with him!

Tao, once again, pointed me to some very helpful words. Upon his suggestion, I began reading Romans 6. Here are a few verses that speak directly to the nature of sin and guilt with some explanations included with the Knox bible. I hope you all find them as helpful as I do.

Romans 6: 5 We have to be closely fitted into the pattern of His resurrection, as we have been into the pattern of His death;[St Paul thinks of baptism not as washing us from our sins, but as burying us to our sins. Baptism mystically identifies us with our Lord’s passage through the tomb.] 6 we have to be sure of this, that our former nature has been crucified with him, and the living power of our guilt annihilated, so that we are the slaves of guilt no longer. 7 Guilt makes no more claim on a man who is dead. (What freedom this means for us! If we bury our old life of sin, our new life is free from guilt!)