Relapsed. I’m done waiting many days to ask out girls. I’m waiting 2 days to finish most my work this semester, then I’m using dating apps.
lonely. sad. busy. will be busy Friday and Saturday. won't be able to start moving toward biological imperative again till Monday.
girl wasn't in class. took her test elsewhere. she graduated so I won't see her again. messaged her on a school platform as a last effort.
Completed challenges: June, July, August 2016 From 2023-02-23, 3×30 days September 2023 November 2023
So sad Gary Wilson passed away in the age of vast information. He could have put together serious knowledge for ppl worldwide.
Went for a walk to the town and got some ice cream. It was noisy and I keep fidgeting so I'm in my pyjamas with my blankets to calm down.
There are countless books from facebook mum's raising their spazzy sons, but when's the last time you saw one working as a lawyer? Or just as a functioning human being, a grown man? I feel nothing. To me, there is no difference between a human being and an object like a chair. I understand empathy and emotion, but in the flesh, a person to me is a slab of meat.
I sound like an ableist dickhead but honestly idgaf. I'm sick of either being labelled a literal bib-wearing drooling retard who can't learn his ABC's or some sort of stereotypical Sheldon Cooper savant. This shitty world makes no sense and they will actively drag you down to their level of misery and self-destruction.
A doctor is special. An athlete is special. A lawyer is special. A physicist is special. A historian is special. A writer is special. What's so special about some moron with a slow brain? Will he ever love? Will he ever achieve anything? Will he ever have a family? He isn't special, he is diseased. A retard with no hope of ever making it. That's how they viewed me. The bastards.
