Accountability for All

day 14

 

Aside from Contractions I do all of them to drain my mental energy everyday. I am having healthy diet. Instead of of meditation I do EFT tapping from a youtube channel. The guys words on that channel is pretty strong. Take cold showers. Sleeping facing sideways. It's just that all of these things I do before night sleep but all of this happened afternoon when I felt asleep after a hard days' workload.

 

Day 79 in the books!!! Finished reading The 10X Rule!!!

 

Day 2: Haven't had urges to watch porn until night when I opened my internet for reading books. Still it's not like I wasnt aware of those triggers and urges, which I had. All in all I haven't used internet because I had a headache and with my hamstring injury, my motivation was fueled with pain to not touch. those screens. Not like I was able to use my phone or laptop because I was sick lol. I don't think I will able to do much with my physical actitivites. And blocker app is constantly not working on my phone. I had uninstall and install it couple of times sigh. And all those keywords, websites and apps get deleted after I uninistall it. I have to find a new app with unlimited access like this modded version.

 

I'm Higor, I'm 19 years old and struggling with this addiction for 5 -6 years. This shit is really hard to overcome, I'm trying to win the reboot for one year and a few months and the maximum that I got, was 11 days, but I usually relapse between 1-2 days. Anyway, what I noticed is that I need more social interaction, take care of the roots of my addiction, make myself accountable, and so on.

So this is my first day here, and I didn't relapse.

PS: I bought a REALLY good e-book on how to overcome pon addiction, now I running out of time, but probably tomorrow I'll post some things that I learned with it.

 

I heard that eating spicy foods before going to bed makes you have wet dreams. So I stopped doing that and it helped a little bit.

 

Relapsed yesterday.. but i dont feel bad. iam proud of my self that i did a 7 days streak. i never thought i can go past 5days..
starting fresh today...

 

Hay q crear un grupo de wsp

 

yeah ,bro I have had tons of blocks, but nothing were of any use.

So just to give an introduction of my journey.
I always had issues like anxiety, depression, overthinking, self-doubt, perfectionism etc..
So I have lost many things in my life, I failed in academics , was neglected by friends for fests, was too shy to talk to girls, failed in sports etc... Then suddenly in my 9th or 10th standard things started to get better. Because I started watching things I felt attactive (not exactly porn) ,and I also fapped. so I found solace in this new found drug .

I wasted my next three years of my life always finding repression in porn. now I am repeating a year for an entrance exam year and guess what the entrance exams are upcoming and I haven't learnt a thing. Because I introduced myself to the actual porn. I think the lockdown here has also played a major role cuz I am always stuck in my bedroom.

Because whenever I am under stress my mind wants me to watch porn and feel better and as a result I watch it ,feel better for a while and after that like shit .I sleep the entire day and sit awake at night and not eat breakfast properly and the cycle continues.

But now things have started to go better compared to past three years .For the first time i have crossed the one day mark. I have reached 5days ,7 days and my highest being 20 days.


presently I am on day 2 of NoFap again . But this time I am not going to fail no matter what,cuz this is the first time I have seen so many people openly speaking about NoFap.



Some valid tip to anyone reading this...
1.Its not always women who are the reason behind our craving, its our stress and fear.



For me example I am constantly worried about the result of my examination and future and so what watched porn,so it means I would have even used any drug if it was available. Now I realize there is no point in fapping yeah now i accept the fact that because of years of fapping i might not get into a good college now but soon my life will get better now rid of habit.


2.you cannot get rid of porn thinking about NoFap just keep yourself busy.

3.now this the best thing I have seen recently just stop using your social media ,not just instagram but youtube too because whenever I watch Youtube I had this overwhelming feeling that I was the only one sad and everyone was happy, which is absolutely rubbish.What we see in youtube is their happy side.

moreover you will start working for you .

Life is gonna get better champs ,it might not be today, it might not be tommorrow, but it will definitely change for the better.

 

So just to give an introduction of my journey.
I always had issues like anxiety, depression, overthinking, self-doubt, perfectionism etc..
So I have lost many things in my life, I failed in academics , was neglected by friends for fests, was too shy to talk to girls, failed in sports etc... Then suddenly in my 9th or 10th standard things started to get better. Because I started watching things I felt attactive (not exactly porn) ,and I also fapped. so I found solace in this new found drug .

I wasted my next three years of my life always finding repression in porn. now I am repeating a year for an entrance exam year and guess what the entrance exams are upcoming and I haven't learnt a thing. Because I introduced myself to the actual porn. I think the lockdown here has also played a major role cuz I am always stuck in my bedroom.

Because whenever I am under stress my mind wants me to watch porn and feel better and as a result I watch it ,feel better for a while and after that like shit .I sleep the entire day and sit awake at night and not eat breakfast properly and the cycle continues.

But now things have started to go better compared to past three years .For the first time i have crossed the one day mark. I have reached 5days ,7 days and my highest being 20 days.


presently I am on day 2 of NoFap again . But this time I am not going to fail no matter what,cuz this is the first time I have seen so many people openly speaking about NoFap.



Some valid tip to anyone reading this...
1.Its not always women who are the reason behind our craving, its our stress and fear.



For me example I am constantly worried about the result of my examination and future and so what watched porn,so it means I would have even used any drug if it was available. Now I realize there is no point in fapping yeah now i accept the fact that because of years of fapping i might not get into a good college now but soon my life will get better now rid of habit.


2.you cannot get rid of porn thinking about NoFap, just keep yourself busy.

3.now this the best thing I have seen recently just stop using your social media ,not just instagram but youtube too because whenever I watch Youtube I had this overwhelming feeling that I was the only one sad and everyone was happy, which is absolutely rubbish.What we see in youtube is their happy side.

moreover you will start working for you .

Life is gonna get better champs ,it might not be today, it might not be tommorrow, but it will definitely change for the better.

 

pluck + nosync
or else pluck --more-help

 

How about all the 19 year old's starting a group?

 

Yea , You guys were right, cue-exposure works but it is artificial, as long as I dont break the chain and create a life away from P , I will relapse eventhough the streaks may be longer.
Cue-expo forced me to go on routine , I forced myself to do Pushups , cold showers and breath work after doing it , maybe the long streaks are because of that . It works but it isn't a natural way to sustain yourself

 

ahhh relapsed....the maximum days i can go is 14days

 

I did exactly just that! I'm beyond a donkey at this point I'm a total shit I'm so sorry, I binged like there was no tomorrow.

I partially blame my boss for forcing me to pull an all-nighter to finish some urgent work. I staid awake for 32hrs and they gave me the next day OFF, when I got back home I couldn't sleep, things just went downhill from there. I guess lack of sleep kills your reasoning and will power, lesson learned.

I'm back at the game bros. If I don't do 90days this time am a throw myself out the window or something, I need a serious punishment.

 

that's probably the reason they come up, you just entertained them minutes ago and got the dopamine hit, that's all your brain cares about.
it's a vicious cycle: Only way to break it is to shock it with something external like a quick lifestyle change, a trip with someone, or just a very high wave of motivation sometimes is enough to break the first few days, which is all you need.

 

my man is on fire
best quote from the author: "Show up even if your eyes are bleeding"

 

@Marourag yezzir!!

day 80 in the books!!!

 

Day 3 boys!