Accountability for All

Day 89 in the books!!! Finished reading a book called Experts in Humanity!!!

 

Day 1 for me. Time to quit once and for all.

 

Day 1

 

I second what @WalktheLine said. That's what I meant by systems , having a routine to look forward to. But that's just one part.

Now "alone" and "frustrating work" , the terms that you used are about emotions. Systems alone won't get you out of those, although it helps.

How does it help?

I am alone. - ok well. What I am doing about that ? My system - I make sure to express gratitude to atleast one person a day. I make sure to read a self help book 30 minutes a day which in turn makes me want to share the concepts and help people. I make sure to do exercise and meditation everyday so that I always have energy to engage in conversations . It increases my quality of conversations. These r few things that help me engage more often with people . I used to feel alone, now I don't.

These are not enough though. Emotions have to CONFRONTed . They have to be given time. U cant look for a quick fix like this addiction or make urself busy with routine .

Say you want to talk to a girl but you fear rejection . So you decide to not do that and ultimately u end up being alone. Again confrontation with yourself helps.

So U have to CONFRONT emotions . There has to be some change in the way you see them. It's about your beliefs and attitude.

If you start to use willpower against the urge, because you ignore what you are feeling , ignore all the -vity, all the emotions. That's where you will fail. It's a battle against urself. Don't be a part of it. Rather be an observer.

We r talking about bringing CHANGE.

Willpower doesn't bring CHANGE. It's a fight that's all. It's not thinking and changing .

Your willpower should be about not participating in the fight. Rather bring some change around.

I am talking about that willpower , the term that we apply to refer to our inner strength against an urge.

Willpower is good for complementing a good emotion like trying to build muscle. But using it against addiction or bad habits deosnt work. Instead systems and confrontation is what we need to do.

Using your willpower agaisnt multiple choices is a bad idea. The primal force will win because you are not clear. You want to have clear thinking first and then use willpower to complement that thinking.

Rn frustration and being alone after work has automated your actions. There is no thinking which is the first step. U r directly calling your inner forces (soldiers) without a clear order in mind.

Best way to deal with enotions is to sit and monitor your feelings , think why I am feeling this ? What can I do to change things ? Note them down . And finally take action with systems.

You are walking on thin line brother . It's not a relapse but you have consider this as serious.

 

https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2014.00823/full
https://doi.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037/xge0000083
https://web.sas.upenn.edu/kurzbanepblog/2011/08/29/glucose-is-not-willpower-fuel/
https://www.pnas.org/content/110/37/14837
http://michaelinzlicht.com/research/
Read these or Chapter-8 Indistractable , because will-power fatigue isn't really a thing, I used to believe in that . Its hard to explain but just read these stuff.
Even very successful people fall to this addiction , so it isn't about will power anyway, its about discipline.

 

you are rocking it my man!

you too bro!

and you

and you too, even if you looked at p-subs.


haha it just feels so great when all you people are doing good!
keep going guys, never forget nofap is the better lifestyle.

 

Day 9.
Trying to avoid situations that gives me urges. I'm also meditating and reading a lot. Spiritual practices really helps

 

Day 2 checking in

 

Day 90 in the books!!! Let’s gooooo!!!

 

You're awesome, great job. I hope i can get there one day.

 

Day 11: It was a stressful day, but I was stronger.

I'll hit 15 days without losing my current strike!

 

Holy shit man, I'm so happy for you, props!!!

 

day 2

 

you did it man! keep going, and dont look back.

 

Day 2 - Controlling my environment a lot better.

 

And you too bro.

 

Thank you for sharing your tips

Awesome and very interesting stuff ! So all my life i've been living a lie !! felt so real tho
Just bought the book you recommended, should be an interesting read. Thank you

Yeah I get what you mean. Being alone and frustrated is a cue that triggers a series of bad habbits that I can't fight using willpower, longterm.
Confronting emotions tho I don't know man.. Maybe I'm not the type for that, or i'm missing something from being emotionally immature, to be honest i dont even know what you're talking about. I like the systems approach tho. I believe anything can be fixed with a good set of rules (systems) given you're consistent with them. I believe a good system will make it easy to stick to anything.

Totally agree! Thank you brother

 

congrats brother !!! can you levitate ?

 

Thank you!! You will one day!!! Keep pushing!!!

 

thank you!! I appreciate it!!