I believe this is the way to do it, take your win from your pervious challenge and use it to boost into your next one.
Update missed the last couple days due to work and personal projects but happy to report no relapses for me had a close call watching youtube again and seeing something that made me wanna pmo but i beat it by taking some deep breaths and clearing my mind. Currently on day 12/14
Frustrated af to share that I relapsed on 2nd day. Starting the reboot again - Day 0. Any advice on how to avoid distraction of getting relapsed?
day 0/14 I'm here from the 7-day challenge. One minute at a time, one hour at a time. Let's go. EDIT - I wrote about this in my journal today but I felt like sharing it here as well. Within the past 2 weeks, I rewatched The Matrix (1999). I hadn't seen that movie in years! Hands down one of my favorites of all time. Obviously it brings up many philosophical questions, and those are for another forum lol. But I did have the thought - when Neo is in that simulation with Morpheus, and he sees the woman in the red dress, he is tempted to look at her... and she turns out to be Agent Smith! I imagine that's what PMO is like: it seems so alluring, the feeling of being so close to someone like that. But it's actually a perverted demon and a parasite. Sucking away at our life force and our drive to accomplish anything or have anything meaningful in a relationship. but like Morpheus said, we will learn to eventually be like Neo - free minds without a need to dodge bullets. We'll be able to see through how false this demon is. Like at the end of the movie when Neo becomes the One, and he can see the Matrix code running through everything, showing him how false the computer simulation is.
Day 2/14 complete! @Inhale&Exhale Don't focus on the relapse that already happened. Think of how you can avoid the next one. Make a plan for one new thing you can do the next time you are about to relapse.
Fuck it. I'm tired of playing this game of "I have to reset my counter every day because I masturbate in bed as soon as I wake up.". It's over, I have to go back to my discipline... My record of no P is almost 6 months. My record of no M is just 45 days, I have to get to those 90 days NOW. I'm starting to believe that I've been depressed since I went back to M on February this year. It's been tragic months, I've been suicidal almost every week, and I think this has to do with the lack of energy I'm wasting every morning on stupid fantasies. Fuck those, I'm changing now. In 9 hours I will complete my first 24 hours of no M, tomorrow morning I will STOP all those fantasies in my head and wake up. No more of this shit, I gotta change my life. Starting now, see you on the road brothers...
