Day 362. I might take a decision that will change my life soon. Please pray for me. God's will be made.
@Anas778 welcome back brother. @RiseToGreatness nice wave of responses. Always having an eye on the fellowship
54 days, Overall a good day, I've worked most of the day and in the evening I did a calisthenics workout. I've decided to switch from the gym to the workout recently, I think it's better to exercise outside while it's summer
I'm back from my little camping adventure and all in one piece ! Checking in day 262. Thanks for asking, I appreciate that yeah I am OK.
Day 214 Today I celebrated the wedding of two of my closest friends; it was an honour to be there and serve them, but celebrating with my church family is an experience I won’t soon forget. I’ve recently had a significant life change that I’ll talk about soon, and with it many other aspects of life are changing. It’s been a long day again but now I have the week off so I will have ample time to process - all will be shared soon.
Day 20 check in. Days PMO-free in 2022: 206 out of 214. @i89rt5 and @RiseToGreatness I thank you both for your feedback and encouragement. Relationships can be complicated and we're working on ours. We've done a lot of marriage counseling and individual therapy and probably have more left to do. Your support is appreciated!
Day 6 complete! Well, I must report that I did peek at porn a bit today. My blocker failed--not insofar as I was able to get around it by deliberately fishing, but for some reason it just failed to catch triggering material that appeared randomly. Thankfully I was able to stop and pull myself away before I progressed into a serious relapse. A little bit of self-awareness made the difference. I recognized what I was doing, reminded myself that I didn't want to do that, not really, and I stopped. I couldn't believe how easily that worked; it was all the gift of God's grace. Then I double-checked that all the blocker features were functioning and went on with my day. Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati, pray for us!
@newbobido @Redemptionisrequired @RiseToGreatness , thank you guys for your concern and advices, but you misunderstood me The hard mode has hardly anything to do with this valley in my relationship with my wife. I wish she did like sex with me and you would be right but she doesn't. She was sad quite often recently because of the same reason: lack of attention and time together. This reboot helps me win her back for the right reasons. It's quite the opposite actually. This hard mode is not even a challenge because I would not be having sex throughout this time anyways I think the main circumstance that led her to this state is me finding a new job in a big and quite famous company. I feel that I am not good enough for this job so that makes me want to work harder. What I wanted to tell you is that my wife is always unhappy about the relationship and I am the one who has to do all the work changing my behaviour. This is not sustainable. Unless maybe I am a shitty partner I guess.
55 (23 hard mode) days complete I had a second wet dream throughout the hard mode. I am starting to win back my wife. But I still have no idea how to make a lasting change in the way I treat her. So I am going to find a relationship psychologist and start visiting him, the company's insurance lets me visit a psychologist 15 times per year. I am going to start in autumn so that 15 sesions would end as the year ends and I could have 15 more sessions right after, so it would be 30 consecutive sessions. My wife doesn't like psychologists so she will most likely not join me. And yay, I am a warrior!
day 5 - check in Day 4 ended fine, due in part to my heightened vigilance. I must maintain that for next vulnerable moments
DON’T GO EXPECTING PERFECTION “That cucumber is bitter, so toss it out! There are thorns on the path, then keep away! Enough said. Why ponder the existence of nuisance? Such thinking would make you a laughing-stock to the true student of Nature, just as a carpenter or cobbler would laugh if you pointed out the sawdust and chips on the floors of their shops. Yet while those shopkeepers have dustbins for disposal, Nature has no need of them.” —MARCUS AURELIUS, MEDITATIONS, 8.50 We want things to go perfectly, so we tell ourselves that we’ll get started once the conditions are right, or once we have our bearings. When, really, it’d be better to focus on making do with how things actually are. Marcus reminded himself: “Don’t await the perfection of Plato’s Republic.” He wasn’t expecting the world to be exactly the way he wanted it to be, but Marcus knew instinctively, as the Catholic philosopher Josef Pieper would later write, that “he alone can do good who knows what things are like and what their situation is.” Today, we won’t let our honest understanding of the world stop us from trying to make the best of it. Nor will we let petty annoyances and minor obstacles get in the way of the important job we have to do.
95 days – After knowing the seduction of their leader to porn, the Istari nominate you as their Chief Wizard. You receive a new staff, fashioned from an upturned sapling with a blue crystal embedded in the crown. The staff possesses magical healing abilities. It will help you regain strength and fight for the next 85 days. Quest Magic – Wizard Staff
You are right my brother, I should rephrase what I mentioned to practicing Karezza, this can be done after the individual has rebooted and is ready to gradually rewire his brain to an actual person as opposed to a screen. All while, continuing to benefit from retention.
Checking in Fellowship Friends! 22 Days Free of PMO. A little bit more anxious this morning, also very eager for this dizziness to finally subside. Intent for the day is similar, meditation, walking, exposure , reading and work. I aim to spend more time outside as well. Stay Strong! @Kairose Stand stronger brother ! 22 days – You enter the cold Misty Mountains, the Hithaeglir.