35 and Older Accountability Group

Discussion in 'Accountability Partners' started by artifact, Nov 24, 2018.

  1. I understand your frustration, I too am struggling every day to get a decent streak going. Sometimes nofap seems like a war that can't be won, but we have members in the group who have proven otherwise. I hope you will not quit the group. Several other member quit in the past only to rejoin later. It is your choice, of course.
     
  2. GottaBFree

    GottaBFree Fapstronaut

    I would take a break but I don't think it would help. It's a war that must be won so little choice but to move forward.
     
  3. NICEDUDE

    NICEDUDE Fapstronaut

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    Starting afresh! Checking in...
     
    Last edited: Nov 9, 2020
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  4. WorldWanderer

    WorldWanderer Fapstronaut

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    Checking in. After a week of failed attempts, I am now on day 10 and feeling good. Urges are strong but with the hopeful course reversal in America, I am stronger than ever and can defeat my bad habit/addiction.
    It's a new day!
     
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  5. discovery

    discovery Fapstronaut

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    This is how I've been feeling as well. I wouldn't call it quitting as much for me, as I haven't been making much of an attempt in the first place to quit from. It's a lack of motivation. As I've mentioned before, my lifestyle is the same as its been from the start of the pandemic. Very boring, stuck at home. It's hard for me to see the light at the end of the tunnel like this. It's hard to see the benefits of giving it up, but easy to see the withdrawal effects.

    That being said, I'm making another attempt now. I, like many, fell victim to election stress. I read a news article about the spike in stress eating due to it. I, like many, have very sharp opinions about what is happening in the United States and the outcome of the election was a very big deal for me. I was practically glued to the coverage for the full 5 days and the only breaks I seemed to take were to eat, sleep and PMO. And I did binge PMO way more than usual during this period. If you saw me rack up some consecutive days on my counter that is only because I didn't update it.

    But now its over, (mostly) and I feel a lot of closure. Time to refocus on other things.
     
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  6. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    Day 55 - same old story as far as weekend stress. I've settled into a dull emotional state, neither excited nor distraught, but just sad deep down. I am firmly convinced that any PMO is going to make me feel worse than I already do, so part of me has changed enough that I am not retreating to that coping mechanism and bad behavior. About the only positive thing I feel in my life right now is that I am at my longest streak ever and it gives me hope that there will be some positive change for me in my life.
     
  7. Circleinthesquare

    Circleinthesquare Fapstronaut

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    Monday eve check in. Start again - always the weekends that get me. The slightest stimulus of ***** when watching a film and I'm away when I'm by myself...
     
  8. There will be positives coming and you're right that PMO will only make you feel worse. Stay strong.
     
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  9. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    What is "the end of the tunnel"? Some future point in time that will provide us a better life in some aspect? My nofap journey is moment to moment. As another hour passes, when that stress situation presents and I don't reach for the phone and go to a P site to salve my pain, when I have an urge or a memory of a P image and move along instead of acting upon it, that is my light - in that moment. I find benefit in the immediacy of that success. And then it is on to the next moment.
     
    Last edited: Nov 10, 2020
  10. GottaBFree

    GottaBFree Fapstronaut

    I've been feeling similar to @discovery

    Some progress in rejoining the land of the living today. Shooting for day 2 on the counter.
     
  11. NICEDUDE

    NICEDUDE Fapstronaut

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    Let's do it once together!
     
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  12. discovery

    discovery Fapstronaut

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    Some excellent insight Tony. I've always viewed the NoFap journey as one leading to a goal well down the road instead of one that shows immediate benefits on a day-to-day, moment-to-moment basis. It is a wonderful and beneficial reframe. Right now I am 4 minutes into Day 3 and I feel nice and calm. That is my immediate success. Thanks.
     
  13. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    Thanks @discovery . Nothing new in this concept though, many here speak of this technique of being in the moment. Simply taking what the current popular culture refers to as "mindfulness" and apply to recovery behavior. And we know mindfulness is based on eastern meditation techniques. Just breathe. I recently saw a post that someone using breathing and counting to six with visualization to break the grip of an urge or P memory. I think I'll add that to my toolkit.
     
    Last edited: Nov 10, 2020
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  14. It definitely would not help me. I spent half my life trying to quit PM on my own and only progress I ever made was since I've been in this group.
     
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  15. GottaBFree

    GottaBFree Fapstronaut

    Checking in. Feels like an important day to stay on track.
     
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  16. David2018

    David2018 Fapstronaut

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    Restarting..........I think I'm the worst at this.
     
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  17. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    Me too. I tried quitting for years and it's only since I joined this site in June that I made any progress. What I learned here was that I was a PMO addict. Period. Do the work and face this. I'm approaching 60 days which has put a whole new perspective on my life. I'm very grateful for all the help here.
     
  18. David2018

    David2018 Fapstronaut

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    That's great to read Tonyk. Good luck on your journey. I hope to see you at 600 days.
     
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  19. Timber

    Timber Fapstronaut

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    I’m in a state of torpor, and of my own making too. I have been acting on my urges, while trying to “observe” my behaviour. It’s not working anymore. It used to put distance between me and PMO, but it doesn’t anymore. Now it’s just one big mess and I feel in a haze.

    Time to revisit my previous strategies. I think @Jerky has an excellent point about embracing the urges without PMO!
     
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  20. tonyk1982

    tonyk1982 Fapstronaut

    Thanks man. I will be thankful for reaching the end of today staying clean. And then comes tomorrow.

    @David2018 May I ask - what are your challenges to staying free of PMO? Why do you say that you are "the worst at this"?
     

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