Day 0/90 Day 593 at attempting this challenge Day 206 weight training (M, W, F) Lifestyle: reduced caffeine, alcohol and sweets Yup, relapsed this morning. You won't believe this but I was triggered by a video my mother forwarded to me yesterday of semi-nude cancan dancers. Once the dopamine surge hit, I could only hold it at bay for so long, circled the drain a few times, then reset my counter. Ironic since it was my mother who started my porn addiction by showing me my Dad's Playboy mags when I was about 10yo ... before I even knew how to cum. That's okay, shit happens and I don't hold bitterness toward my mother for it. At least I am consistent as my thresh-hold seems to be about a month and this one went a little longer at 35 days. Onward and upward, gentlemen.
What you don't know is that you are one of the people who motivated me to reach my current streak. I remember you updating day 68 and I was really struggling with relapses and urges but your counter gave me a new motivation. I can also relate with where you are, after 100 days last year in October, I got to that point where I could no longer control my body, I lost all the benefits..it was really bad. As much as you are saying you don't have control I believe it is your body that that is still being exposed to triggers. What are your triggers? You need to be deliberate and tackle them, I realized sometimes triggers are many, simply because you have dealt with some and still you are relapsing doesn't mean you are defeated. Analyze upto the last trigger and get intentional to kill. It may take time but you are not defeated.All the best!
I also struggled since my relapse after 88 days last July. Can you imagine a struggle for 2 months, I even used a counter to check how many days I relapsed since that long streak, and it was almost 30 days. Can you imagine 30 days of pmo but looking to the bright side it was 30 days of nopmo. I got disgusted of what I was doing a lot, and an hour later I find myself doing it all over again. It's normal to feel depressed and find yourself drowning. The benefits are always there but you will need to dig deeper. If you want my advice on how to fight back, you need to let go of your body and your thoughts and your guilt of relapsing from the first place. Try to get committed to nofap again as soon as possible. I found that when I relapsed I felt ashamed of even commenting here or on the reddit forums, as I had a counter of 88 days now I am reseting it almost daily. The worst part about relapsing is not the guilt of doing it, its the shame of doing it. I wish you all the best, and if you want a partner we can help each other out. Just fight back and don't lose hope.
I greatly recommend books : Gary Wilson - Your Brain On Porn , Eddie Capparucci - Going Deeper, how the inner child impacts your sexual addiction. Currently going throught 2nd one, it's a big WOW, It tells you more about you and ur addiction, things that we're not conscious about.
Hey friends, after a pretty bad relapse and several attempts I was able to complete the 30-day challenge today. I want to keep this positive effort going so am continuing forward here. I failed last time I tried the 90-day, but I'm not giving up. Good to be back with you all on this thread. Here we go, Day 0.
Trying man. Infact doing everyday habits just like in streak. I don't know suddenly my body goes completely out of control while I am busy with work too. My mind says no. But I don't know how it is happening. Edit: I think my brain associated pmo with my present environment.
I need a completely new environment. I think that's the problem. For getting relapsed...first of all it's the thoughts too. Many times I deflect the thoughts to some other thoughts but still my body is behaving on its own. I think I need a complete change of environment. Which can happen in a month or so. I will be moving out of the house. But still I can't give up till then. So doing every habit I did during the clean days. It's a pleasure that my streak was able to help you.
I think I need to put a habit calender once again. I used to maintain a habit calender on printed papers to get motivated with doing habits and seeing clean days and relasped days weight over all. Actually I am having a partner. You can too be my partner.
Day 3/90. Don't worry about the time. The time will pass. What you need to ask yourself is where do you want to be after 90 days. I want to be a new, stronger man in 90 days.
Day 3/90. Feeling a bit worse than yesterday, but that happens especially this early on. However, I do feel as if the urges are controlled. Mentally I've blocked them out, something I hadn't been doing well prior to my last two relapses in a span of two weeks. Wish I could just feel good already, but I need to be patient to get back there!
