Well, we both agree that Jesus is the word. That much is certain. I don't think the bible is the same thing as Jesus, so in that sense I don't think the bible is the word. But I think the bible lets you look inside the mind of God. Inside the word. So I think it shows you the word. So it looks like we agree, but express it differently Btw, tomorrow I have a pharmacology exam. It is very difficult, especially remembering all the substance-names and receptors. So if anyone reads this and feel like praying, that would be appreciated!
Praying for you. May Our Lord give you confidence in what you have learned from study of the science as well the confidence of knowing He is charge. It would be great to know another devout Christian is finding success in life and within a field of study that is beneficial to mankind. Let us know how the exam goes. I am praying for you.
It felt like the exam went well, so thanks for your prayers, and thank God! However, I am sad to say that I have relapsed again. This time I have noticed something in my failures though, something I could use some help with sorting out. Temptation for me goes like this: Satan: Here look at this image I put in your mind! Me: No that's evil Satan: Silence Me: Crap, that suggestion was enticing, God will you help me? I'll ask for help, usually meditating on some scripture. Satan: Today is a good day to sin, although there are consequences like brain fog, shame, and social disconnection, these things will pass within a few days. You always recover! And God will forgive you if you sin. Here look at this other enticing thought. Me: God please help. *time passes Ah, it settled down, I don't feel as enticed anymore I'll think to myself. While in the unseen world, Satan sits in the shadows, laughing at my folly. The seed has been planted he thinks. And it has. So Satan goes to find some other victim or whatever it is he does, and leaves me to my self-destruction. Me: I guess I don't feel as enticed anymore. But if I sin, I will recover and regain my vigor in a few days, and God will forgive me. Today is a good day to sin after all, I have no responsibilities for a few days, so no one will see me being a bit more dead than usual. *Opens incognito window Here you have pretty much every temptation I go through, I am very embaressed to share with you how rotten my heart can be. So please have mercy. What I would like to ask for is help with sorting out these seeds that Satan plants, because I think my failure to deal with his statements, are what causes me to fall. Namely: 1. You will recover 2. God forgives you 3. It is particularly convenient to sin today 4. You can always start again, try again. And here is the tricky part, he uses so much truth. 2 and 4 are true statements, 1 is true it seems. And 3 is true in the sense that on some days sin has less immediate consequences. It is one thing to exchange lies for truth, but what about when Satan uses truth? How do I battle that, I can't exactly throw up a bible verse and say: No that's incorrect Satan, God won't forgive me, I won't recover, I can't start again. But then there might be something else I am too blind to see. Am I really relying on the spirit for instance?
1. If you constantly relapse, you won't recover. The negative effects of PMO are long lasting and take a lot of time to heal. 2. God forgives all who sincerely repent. Willfully persisting in a sin is not bearing the fruit of repentance. Yes, this sin infects our wills and we can't just stop by ourselves. But we need to turn to God to find forgiveness and freedom. Otherwise we are cheapening grace and in danger of turning away from God and his forgiveness in our hearts, re-crucifying the Son of God in our hearts. Never give up. Don't listen to the lie that it is all fine to sin now because God will forgive. The kindness and mercy of God should draw us to repentance. 3. Garbage. It's always convenient to the sin and addiction. Simultaneously, to sin is always inconvenient to your true self that God has called you to be, your peace, wellbeing, closeness to God, happiness, joy, freedom. 4. This is true...but only up to a point. You can't do this after you are dead. And what if you die tomorrow? Time will run out eventually. Today is the day to depend on God for freedom. Just do it for today, don't even commit to it beyond today. Then when tomorrow comes, do the same thing again.
I echo everything @Rebooter2022 said in his comment. I will only add that it is not just death that prevents us from starting again or seeking forgiveness anew. (Perhaps even after death there is a chance at forgiveness? Who knows? We know only that God is good beyond anything we can imagine or hope to expect.) The terrifying reality is that if we persist in sin, our hearts grow calloused toward it until we can no longer even see it is wrong. Indeed, we gradually lose all sense of right and wrong as we continue to attempt to nourish ourselves on folly. Is there still salvation for such a person? Again, I can only say maybe. Who can be certain? But one thing I know -- life for this person is miserable. It is *so much* easier to just be done with sin and learn to turn to Christ n every moment. After my recent dalliance with lust, I am reminded anew of how precious his peace is and how wonderful life is when lived with joy -- and just how colorless and insipid it is when lived in lust and anxiety. Let's pursue him with abandon and be finished once and for all with sin and self!
Thank you! These are things I need to hear! I wonder why I have not dealt with Satan's half-truths before. And these are things that I have not fully thought about before, so I am glad that I learnt something new. The second point you made is particularly frightening, since it does imply that I am playing Russian roulette with my soul when I sin. And I think it is correct since sin has a hardening effect on us, and who knows how much longer we can keep hardening ourselves until we become another king Saul? Do you have any bible verses that come to mind regarding these statements? I think of rev 3:21 To the one who overcomes, I will grant the right to sit with Me on My throne, just as I overcame and sat down with My Father on His throne. If I don't overcome I am not bearing the fruits of faith, which is frightening. "In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths." -Proverbs. Yes life is easier without it, I have seen that. But we shouldn't stop there, we should acknowledge him in everything. I was just wondering if I truly was relying on his spirit for help. Maybe this verse answers that question. Acknowledge him in everything, do everything in faith, pray without ceasing. Do you think it is correct of me to say that this is what God reliance looks like?
Yes! This is it exactly! And we can only live in this way with his help and by his grace. Apart from him, we can do nothing.
I hope I am not missing something this time. Now these things have been brought to light: God-reliance, and answers to Satan's rationalisations thanks to Rebooter2022. And also watching, something I have not taken too seriously before. The heart must always be watched. Otherwise, I might not see the deceitful hardening that takes place before the climax of sin appears.
Hello, I owe you a quick check-in. Lately I have not been much on the forum, since I don't know how to use it productively. I usually use it to try to learn things, to get to the truth of some matter in order to not live by any lie that might hold me back. Currently, I read some Christian books for this purpose, and they help me see some errors in my life. But if you have any idea of how I might use this forum better, please mention that. It might be that I am also a bit tired of focusing on knowledge, I want to get better at the actions. The actual life I am supposed to live. I do value knowledge and meditations, we are supposed to grow in the knowledge of Christ so this is good of course. But I wonder how I might use this forum to do the things that are my duty as a Christian to do. I think some of you do that by helping others out of this addiction, but I don't think I am qualified to get into that too much. If I see that my recent modifications, and change of heart leads me to stop relapsing every few weeks, then I might get into helping people more.
We have only one duty as disciples of Christ: Love one another. What does that look like for you in your unique situation and circle of influence?
Learning to always remain distrustful of ourselves is the first step to trusting God. I know that if I let temptation into my mind, I am not only in danger of falling at that point but I also rebuild/reinforce/replenish my desire to sin in the future. My role is to turn away from temptation at the first instant and to call on God to fight the power of each temptation for me. We see the consequences of man putting his trust in himself, rather than God, all around us. The news is filled with stories about the aftermath of people's mistakes when they trust in the power of themselves and other humans rather than trusting in God. Perhaps the most foolish and pervasive lie being perpetuated today is embodied in the statement "the heart wants what the heart wants". The human heart wants pleasure, without concern for the cost. It is as ugly and simple as that.
Thanks for your replies. 2 days ago, I fell again. Satan tried a new strategy he has never used before. He did not use the half truths I earlier sought help with dealing with. No he attacked my self-worth, brought to light the things I am unhappy about. I reached a state where I just wanted to forget about my issues, knowing it was a foolish way to deal with it. I wanted to escape the pain very badly. This is a new way in which this sin has been accomplished. A way I was not expecting. So I have looked into ways to deal with his new tactic. Mainly finding bible truths relevant to my issues. To replace lies/half-truths with God's truth. If he can't get me in one way, he finds another weak spot, and gets me in that way. Is this a perpetual cycle, or will we grow enough to not let him use our weaknesses? It seems clear to me that, when temptation lies silent, sometimes sin runs deep. I think Satan can leave us alone if he sees us weakening in some area. And after waiting a while, he suddenly attacks with full force when we are weak enough to give in. So I don't think we should satisfy with looking only at the sin of lust, since he can use other sins as a means to get us to lust. Maybe we should expand our view on the forum, and take a broader universal approach against sin, to grow in all forms of holiness. But that is not my decision to make. But on this thread at least, I invite you to take this broad approach with me.
As we mature in Christ, we grow wise to the enemy's schemes. You are still quite young and there is a lot of growth ahead for you! I know I am still learning each day. I agree that we should focus on the whole picture of becoming like Christ and not focus solely on lust/PMO, even though that is the reason we are all here on this forum in the first place. But I think the messages I read on the forums are quite consistent in this regard: That we are to grow in love for one another in Christ, and that by attaining this, we grow more in every fruit of the Spirit, incl. self-control. Is this not the consistent message you encounter here, too?
There can be no doubt that as Christians we are called to help each other draw closer to Christ and Christ gave us a clear and frightening warning against doing the opposite (Luke 17:2). As we attempt to help others towards holiness, let us remain acutely aware we are always enrolling someone in something, whether that be a good thing or a sinful thing. I love your suggestion but as we help each other grow in all aspects of holiness let us remain mindful of our sinful pride, lest it lead us to a need to be proven right in our beliefs rather than the Christian purpose of drawing everyone to Christ. In my case, it became clear to me that until I tackled my sinful addiction to lust, I could not draw closer to God. It was my most prominent roadblock/idol. As I chipped away at that one, God showed me more clearly the other roadblocks that I have built, such as pride. PMO and the sin of lust mired me in debilitating shame. This was simply the state that I was in. There is no reason to think that others couldn't tackle multiple idols at the same time.
Yes I think you are right in what you say, I wrote that because I had some exceptions in mind I might have focused too much on. But there is something I have been wondering, I relapsed yesterday again. And all I can say is that I had severe intrusive thoughts that I fought until I was exhausted. And then I gave in later. So you are right that I am young and need to grow. I have not been saved for long. It's been three years. And it feels like I am fumbling around in the dark. Searching for the reason why I keep doing this. And sometimes I find connections with certain behaviour, positive or negative. So I cut out or add things. But am I really learning and growing? Why am I then becoming less holy? If I look back on my life and the time I've spent trying to quit this. I've been trying on and off ever since I first looked up p. Quiting was impossible at first. But then I got saved, and things changed. I had no desire to look up p for months. So I had found the cure somehow. But I later fell of course. And if you have observed by journey on this forum, you might remember that I have been going for months from time to time. But here is the mystery: If I am learning and growing in knowledge of Christ, why am I not progressing in holiness? There is no correlation between my knowledge and my streaks, it seems like it doesn't matter. When I first got saved I went for months knowing almost nothing. Now I am more familiar with God's will and the bible, but I keep on failing. I even got better at praying, thanks to some biblical insights from Charles Spurgeon. So it looks like I learn and I grow. But I keep doing this damned sin. And I can't figure out why. When I figure out one way in which it happens, another way shows up. So I don't know where to go from here. Just that I will not give up, and I will keep clinging to Christ.
It is said that it is easier to be understanding when you are 50 than when you are 25. Looking back over my life, I would say that is probably true. I am sure this isn't because we become smarter over time although hopefully we do absorb some of the wisdom we seek over the years. Rather, I think life becomes a touch less intense over time and we find the space to be a bit more patient with ourselves and others. I hope you will see that God is all about mercy and particularly mercy for us poor sinners. God is patiently teaching you and drawing you towards Him, each and every day. Take the peace God wishes to give you and be patient with yourself. You are on the right path, be of no doubt. However, the path is not a short one for most of us. The wisest among us realize that every day is step in the right direction. A single step made in the right direction each and every day is enough. You are doing great!
Yes, I wonder how I will look upon this when I get older. There surely is a difference between someone who has been seeking God for 30+ years, and me, who have tried for three years. So I will be patient, and trust that God will finish his work in me. That is a promise I have found in the bible, so I know I can keep trusting him, and keep going. But I hope I manage to quit this time. I hope to lead a family at some point. And I don't want to go through that while in this sin. And there is another thing I have been thinking about. Sometimes I have the strongest desire to be as Godly as possible, and sometimes, that desire is more weak. Why is this? I know one thing that has had good fruit in my life, is the Lord of the Rings by Tolkien. He did a great job with creating and ideal for men, and how they might behave during different circumstances. The character Aragon has been rooted deep in my mind as what a Godly man would be like. And that image there, that application of the Christly ideal, really helps me understand how beautiful it is to be Godly. But sometimes I forget. And I don't know why, except that reading the bible and praying helps. And also to consume the right forms of information and entertainment. But I don't know if it possible to live like this at all time, to never have a day where I am slightly weaker than the other days.
CPilot is right on in what he says. The disciple's life can only be lived one day at time. What transpires today may seem better or worse than the day before, but if we could see the entire sweep of our lives, we would clearly see their general direction. We are looking for progress toward Christ, not perfection in choosing him every moment. I do not know whether this is even possible in this life, and if it were, those who attained it would likely fall into pride and so be no closer to Christ than anyone else. Focus on Christ today. When you grow weary, rest in him. You will never find rest or satisfaction in PMO, just an endless yearning that can never be fulfilled. If you want true, deep, lasting peace, there is no source for that save Christ alone.
We are weak, but he is strong. Build good habits and then stick with them. They will carry you through to connect with Christ, even on days when your desire for him is weak.
