Foolproof Advice (Not Clickbait)!!1!

Listen, I’ve been at this for a while so maybe a lot of this is projection and self-talk, but if it helps one person out there it will be worth it.

I’m gonna tell you something that you need to hear: Stop taking other people’s advice. I was going to post here so many times about what I thought the true foolproof method was, and every time I still relapsed. So, if someone’s still here – or here at all I guess – odds are they don’t know the best methods.

With that said, let me give you my advice. Out of the dozens of things that people recommend, there is only one thing that can actually help you: your own willpower. Everything is contingent on that. If you do not have willpower, you are going to relapse again and again unless you build it up.

So why did I tell you to stop taking advice and then give my advice? Well, aside from the fact that I’m one of the people who still hasn’t figured it out (and probably still not one to trust), it’s because for once I know this is sound advice. Again, everything is contingent on willpower. If you do not have the willpower to brute force your way through temptation, there will not be enough cold showers you can take or distractions you can use that will keep you from relapse. This is law. I know because I’ve tried everything in the book and I’m still stuck.

Which leads me into another reason I give this advice. I feel for a lot of us, we’re always looking for an easy way out. I started this affliction in mid-2013 and have been hooked since, only starting to fight it in 2016. The longest I’ve gone without relapse was 4 months, two months of which was during my army basic training. After things were done and had settled down, one weekend when my roommate went home I relapsed. I still regret that, but it goes to show again how important willpower is.

I didn’t relapse during those 4 months because I couldn’t, and when I could again, I did. If you’re like me, you always wanted to find the easy way to quit. I’ve tried everything aside from breaking my hands and chemical castration, and now I’ve finally realized the truth of it. There is no easy way. You simply have to suffer, bear your cross and carry on. If you do not have the willpower to do that, you will give in to a slight curiosity and you will relapse. You will stare at a photo on social media for a little too long and you will relapse. You won’t be able to hold yourself back and you will relapse.

If you want to lose weight, you have to learn to keep your hand out of the cookie jar. If you can’t do that then exercise, vegetables, liposuction, nothing is going to help you. It’s the same here. Stop looking for the easy way out and just realize it’s all mental. The more time you spend looking for the foolproof method that will fix you, the less time you’re spending building your mental fortitude. We have to stop trying to get around the temptations and learn to barrel straight through them without relapse. Willpower is the one thing that we will always have. If you use a coping mechanism, what are you going to do when there are no showers or distractions? You’re going to relapse.

We fight temptations daily, it’s just that we haven’t learned quite how to fight these yet because we’re addicted. That doesn’t mean we can’t learn, and it definitely doesn’t mean we need to find an easy way around learning. Stop placing your faith in coping mechanisms and work on your mental strength. Until you can sit in a room with nothing but you and your phone without relapsing, you haven’t gotten better.

Then again, what do I know? I’m probably more messed in the head than most people here.