Is this a relapse?

I would not call it a relapse but you have to understand that you are playing a dangerous game. My question to you would be what exactly were you searching to bump into such a video? I am not judging you whatsoever for coming across such a video, but you might want to 'pull the leash' on your YouTube searching if you want to be successful with your reboot.

As for the fetish, I think it comes down to constant escalation of Porn. Standard P is no longer doing it for your brain, so as a result it needs further or higher escalation to be able to release more dopamine. If you can abstain from P you can unwire and rewire your brain back to how it was. Stay focused and keep going.

 

Yeah I think you're fine, keep going but be wary of YouTube. It will snatch your streak if you are not careful.

 

YouTube is dangerous.

As an example, I like ASMR - it helps me work. I also like pretty girls. Neither are inherently bad.

But I almost fell into a trap yesterday as I was working and listening to/occasionally looking at ASMR videos on youtube. The recommend video algorithm will quickly take you from a perfectly innocent video of a pretty girl giving you a haircut to simulated p*rn that you didn't seek out at all.

I find it just better to not get on YT in the first place.

 

I avoid ASMR because it just evolved to his actual form, Porn. I don’t care what you say, just go on twitch asmr section and you will find something like porn. ASMR is going UP in Porn sites stats. Even if some do it correctly without simulating sexual sounds it’s too late, the fetish is builded and if I listen every kind of ASMR it bring me back to Pornography, since the porn videos I watched mostly are about Asmr or mixing ASMR with other things.
I used it too for concentrating and sleep, but I’ve solved by buying an MP3 and putting calm music, ambient music, natural sounds, ecc...and it works well.

 

Stop fishing for provocative imagery altogether.

 

This ^^^ completely limit risk as much as possible.

 

Delete YouTube off of all devices. The app will trick you into a relapse