NEW 90 Day Challenge - Start on Sunday 22nd May 2016

Hello Fookeh, so how did it go yesterday? Hope you made it through...
Concerning the irritable mood: I have the same problem... But hopefully it becomes more scarce. I have to say that i'm undertaking other challenges than this one. I stopped alcohol and change my diet. All this changings are affecting my mood, but globaly I feel really better. more comfortable with myself

 

Hey guys! Just checking in! Yesterday I reached 30 days without pmo! Woohoo! Honestly, best decision I took in a long time.

@StraightEdge Good for you man! Regarding the other habit changes, I can attest to that, starting one thing definitely makes you have a nice momentum to change other aspects of your life that you aren't happy with. For instance I have a very bad sleeping pattern, and I usually wake up really late, like noon, and even after that some days. It isn't a problem for me work-wise, since I work at home and I work until 3 or 4 in the morning, but I'm really not proud of not being able to wake up early. So for the last couple days I managed to wake up around 6am and it was really productive.

I hope to keep it this way. I also want to have a better diet, but right now I'll try to change one thing at a time.

 

I barely made it through Tuesday night. It was definitely the hardest night I've ever had. I got out of the house for a few hours which helped, but the moment I got home I got the urge big time. I usually have a bite to eat before bed and check out sports highlights. I knew that if I did anything on the computer I was done for, so I went straight to bed. But even laying in bed, it was still driving me crazy. Thankfully, I was able to hold it together and get some sleep.

I still get random urges from time to time but I try and fight them off by doing something productive. Like you, I also quit drinking April 1 so I find that difficult as well. In the past, I've quit smoking and other bad habits, but this is easily the most challenging one to kick. I must say though, like you, I do feel more comfortable with myself. I no longer look in the mirror thinking "On the surface, I'm a good guy, but behind the scenes, I have this dirty addiction no one knows about."

Hard to believe it's almost been a month! 90 days will be here before we know it - hopefully we can all get to our goals.

 

Awesome @fookeh , good for you. I can relate to that last sentence: "On the surface, I'm a good guy, but behind the scenes, I have this dirty addiction no one knows about."

I really feel like today I'm more honest to my beliefs and I have nothing to hide from the people around me.

There's a phrase by Stephen King that sums it up nicely:

"A man who can't bear to share his habits, is a man who needs to quit them."

 

"A man who can't bear to share his habits, is a man who needs to quit them."

Best quote ever!

Had a busy weekend with the family, not many opportunities. Feeling strong and have been re-evaluating my life and looking to make more positive changes.

 

Hi all,

Have been busy with life lately - I guess I should be grateful, there has been little of that idle time that might be when temptation seems to come.

Trying not to think about total days, but... I'm not going to look at porn *this day*. That's all I'm here for.

 

Hey guys,
I seem to be in a good phase. No cravings. Except I feel to have less and less libido (all which surprises me). I think I read somewhere it was part of the process...
Have a good week.

 

I find my cravings have definitely gone down since last Tuesday. Feeling pretty solid this week. I've noticed that I am more readily in the mood whereas before, it would take some work to 'get things going'.

Have a good week and keep pushing on. I wouldn't have made it this far without you all.

 

ha! Funny thing, you 3 pretty much what I would say for myself. I'm so busy with my stuff that for the last couple days I haven't even felt the need to come here and try to find a reason not to pmo. The urges have definitely settled for a while, and I'm feeling way less anxious. I think the benefits are starting to show and that only makes the idea of going back so dumb that even my brain doesn't want it anymore. Let's hope that's the case.

Also, good job guys! I know you didn't have the 30 days as a goal before actually going for the 90 like me, but it's definitely an achievement! 1/3 done!

Cheers!

 

Yes maske. 1/3 is great. Moreover, I'm convinced that this third was the hardest to achieve. We'll see, but now, I'm gaining self-confidence with this challenge.
Congratulations to you, guys.

 

Yes, good job guys - 1/3 was definitely a challenge. I feel much more relaxed and have noticed that I feel a stronger connection with my spouse. Hopefully it keeps getting better. 2 months to go, we got this.

 

Last week was a quiet one, but today and especially this morning was again really hard for me. I had to fight compulsive urges... but I went through!!
I surprised myself making research on "Masturbation and Spirituality"... I suspect myself trying to find a subterfuge... (I red a lot of intersting stuff about tantra etc...)
I almost told myself it wasn't a big deal etc etc... And then I finally managed to quiet my mind. I thought of you guys and of the post I would have to write here... and It definitly helped.

It seems to happen on monday morning, when I find myself alone and when it doesn't work well with my job...

 

Hi, I am just starting my 90 day reboot. Not sure what to expect as I cant remember the last time I even went a week with out PMO. In a relationship so sticking to PM for this one and very hopefully about where this goes.

 

@StraightEdge - Well done on sticking with it! Those urges can sneak up pretty quickly and the brain is on standby to rationalize with you in order to get you to give in. I have been meditating off and on for quite some time now but I have been doing it consistently over the last couple of weeks. That, in conjunction with no alcohol since Mar 31 and exercise (in addition to this challenge), I find myself much more productive and living in the present. Don't get me wrong, the urges still come, that's for sure, but they're nowhere near as frequent.

@jonboy - Welcome. If you are here, you have come to the realization it's time to put an end to the 'p' habit. We are here to motivate, encourage, and support! I credit this site and more specifically those who post on this thread for making it this far on the journey. I truly feel that I will make it to end and then continue beyond that!

 

For the past week I didn't have any intense urges. But I've also been feeling some kind of rationalization, my brain saying something like "See, you're capable of doing this nofap shit. It's been more than a month now. It means you're not addicted. Just go back to your old habits, like once a week is ok."

This, my friends, is my scumbag brain.

And these thoughts come strong when there's problem/stress with my work, specially. Something to watch out.

This has also helped me before:

The idea of coming here to say that I fucked up really makes me not want to fuck it up. So thanks for that, guys.

 

Day 1

I stumbled again, but not as bad as last time which is good I guess. I fapped but no porn, in the shower, so I'm going to reset. I gotta try harder!

 

Welcome on board @jonboy

@fookeh @maske @Someguy777 and the others: thank you. Sharing words and thoughts with you definitly helps
This journey is priceless. After almost 40 days without PMO, I began to clearly understand/experience the difference between sexual desire/need and compulsive behavior. I also took conscience of the dependency we have on others to fulfill this desire and I - surprisingly -do not see it as a weakness... Actually, It's a powerful driver. Desire is life and Pornography is the easy lazy way to fulfill this desire. I understand the difficulty to keep the fluid inside and to be honest, it is a huge difference with women... but definitly, PM is not the solution. It's like fast food. It gives you a short relief but almost immediatly take your energy.
(I don't know if it's clear... sorry for my poor english )

 

I had a pretty good week, although I have been having some weird dreams about my former habit. I had a choice to make this morning as I sit here alone, it was to either let scumbag brain take the reins or come here and make a post. I can't believe it's been 42 days and that I am almost half way done this challenge. I do find I am looking at woman differently these days. I can't quite explain how, but I noticed a shift of some kind.

I guess this comes down to two things - one being belief. We all need to truly believe without a doubt that we don't need p in our lives and secondly, we need to rethink what pleasure and pain is all about. Is the pain of not fapping greater than the pleasure (benefits) we receive from not doing it? I try to remind myself that short term pain will be long term gain.

This is kind of a double challenge for me because I think I eluded to this previously, but I have found that alcohol is a gateway to p for me. It doesn't matter how much I've had to drink - unless I'm not home and/or there is no opportunity (which rarely would happen), the night would always end by fapping. It's been 92 days since my last drink and there have been some real challenges with that as well. It would be easy to say I've taken on too much at once and should just focus on one and not the other, but I know that's scumbag brain trying to halt my progress.

I'm glad to see you're all sticking with it. I can't count the number of times this challenge has saved me. I am too far in the challenge now to be okay with "oops, I messed up, back to day 1". I would never start again and be back to my old habits in no time. I feel because I've had this problem for the last 16-17 years, it's going to take more like 5-6 months before I'm free of the addiction for good. I guess it's like someone who has smoked a pack a day half their lives, the more addicted you are, the harder and more frequent the cravings hit.

It sure feels good to be approaching the half way point!

 

Yeah @fookeh , I also can't believe the time went by so fast. It seems like it was just a couple days ago that I reached a full month. it's been more than half of it already and I didn't even see it. I'm sure 90 days will come in no time. And I feel the urges are getting weaker or I'm getting better in dealing with it. Either way, I'm happy with how things are going.

Also, good job man! Halfway is right around the corner for you and @StraightEdge !

Cheers!

 

Here we are @fookeh! 50% for me and for you tomorrow.
Congratulations buddy! @maske is showing us the way ;-)
And you show me the way concerning the "alcohol stop". Can't remember the last time I didn't drink a drop for such a long period...