New Beginnings

All,
I have just told my SO that I have had issues with masturbation addiction since I was a teen, I am almost 30. It has been my escape mechanism, and has gotten out of control. I think its been two or three weeks so far without incident. I NEVER thought i would be someone like this, and cannot fathom the hurt it has put on my spouse. I am so ashamed of myself, and feel gross almost all of the time. My wife is trying to understand and is being as supportive as she can possibly be. I have started to work out more in hopes to get myself on a positive track. I need some support or just someone who has gone through this that can tell me that I'll start feeling different. I just feel like i am wallowing in shame and embarrasment and would like to try to get back to some form of normalcy. I do not see me going back to masturbation, the amount of hurt this has inflicted on my wife, I just cant see it. But how do you push forward without feeling disgusting all of the time, or love your SO without extreme waves of guilt. I am trying i just need to know that there is some light somewhere because all i see is dark so far.