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Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by RiseToGreatness, Sep 22, 2019.
Day 369 no PMO. Still doing good with nofap but my weight loss situation is on the skids and I need to get back on the plan.
Why don't you try your local parkrun to help you with your weight?
Checking in Fellowship Friends!
Day 401 free of MO and day 10 free of porn. I return to double digits of freedom.
For today's topic of discussion, I would like to bring back our attention to rest and recovery.
Hindsight has finally reached me, after 4 very difficult and challenging weeks. I'm realizing to what extent I was not taking care of my self. Yes, I was practicing my regular morning and night meditation..but this was not enough. The damage I was doing, from both physical and emotional stress, was building up. This lead to a relapse of porn substitute and half a porn video, 10 days ago.
I've noticed that even my workouts were a recipe for heightened cortisol release. For those who don't know, cortisol is known as your stress hormone. When you have heightened levels, you are prone to anxiety, fatigue, muscle soreness , disturbed sleep, amongst a few other things. Disturbed sleep makes the situation worse, as you are just increasing your cortisol and exhausting yourself further, also heightening of all of the above symptoms. This happened to me, and it took a stupidly done workout yesterday to make everything click. I was noticing as the weeks would go on, basic tasks were becoming challenging and were making me ridiculously stressed and anxious , sore and fatigued. It was also a mini-lapse with regards to my burnout and PAWs symptoms. My workouts were no longer supporting my recovery, they became too taxing on the CNS(central nervous system for short). In fact, so much so that I started going backwards. In my experience higher reps are not friendly for someone who is going through withdrawal, nor is HIIT cardio, its best to approach a low intensity, lower repetitions and steady pace cardio approach, to support normalizing your cortisol levels and supporting your recovery.
Understand that there are many other variables that will increase your stress, the days where you are experiencing very many urges, your mind is at war throughout the day. It takes energy to deflect your urges and not give in. On those days, rest and recovery is even more crucial. Health cultivation is a key factor, one that I neglected, in moving forward with your journey and supporting victory over addiction and victory over whatever your day to day struggle is.
My next course of action will be to take 1-2 weeks off from workouts, i'll stick to stretching and walking. First week mostly off, as I want to do undo the damage that I have caused. After the two weeks elapse, I will decrease reps and remove certain exercises.
@ListenPaul Congratulations on triple digits! You've grown a lot brother.
I agree with you. Sometimes we set some undefined workout goals. Some years ago I started with 10 pushups. Then I increased and increased. I reached 100. Then I reached 120 (in several sets). I also worked on the biceps. I used heavier and heavier weights and more and more repetitions. I don't know what my goal was - to become another Arnold Schwarzeneger? Suddenly after a biceps workout witout a warm-up I felt some injury above my elbow. It lingered for a week. I began to analyze it. The pain was all over my arm. I went to the doctor - he was clueless - he prescribed a lot of heavy anti-inflammation drugs. I took them for weeks and nothing has changed. I had a tingling sensation in my fingers.
I began to read about it and tested for various injuries. It turned out that the pain could come from the neck. There are nerves going from the spine to the tips of our fingers. Sometimes the nerves can be pinched (as a result of an injury, frequent repetions). I began a lot of nerve stretching exercises. It helped a lot.
So my advice - don't overdo with workout. Always start with a lot of stretching (in physiotherapy it's called nerve flossing). In my opinion, moderate exercises (for some people and at certain ages) are advisory - they have a very positive effect on the heart, blood pressure, joints, nerves, stress. This is the lesson I have learnt - it took me about two months to figure that out (2 months of suffering - applying various ointmenst, taking strong anti-inflammatory drugs that didn't work, buying a massaging device, and stressing and reading for hours during that time).
But it paid off. Today I have no side effects. Find your limits and don't exceed them.
Morning of the 21st day.
I was able to start the career! Thank you for your prayers! Now I just have to find a place to live in the city . Pray so God's will is done please!
Thanks for the prayer. Yeah I had another urge attack not long after I posted. So I jumped in the cold shower for several minutes, but the funny thing is that even though I came out shivering and shaking, I didn't actually feel cold, so I think I really was close to resetting.
Thoughts and urges were more manageable today than yesterday, but it was still a fight, and I'm in a more agreeable mood today, thankfully it's my weekend, so I can rest off this flatline.
Checking in day 105.
You were rising your self-worth trough the number of reps-weight same way like number of days here The sky the limit....or- the injury and sickness. And we can add the effect of endorphins on the brain to the equation with our often greedy thinking that the more the better.
What was your normal workout like?
Question to anyone that will know the answer:
Will doing meditation on a regular daily basis for an extended period of time, let's say twice a day for a month, without resolving the past (healing subconscious childhood wounds which probably lead to anxiety, low self-esteem ...) eventually heal that wound or will have a long-term positive effect? Or does the meditation has only the soothing / calming effect?
I mean someone told me that I should do meditation in this way and that I would be grateful to him? I'm a bit sceptical to meditation. But I'm not experienced and frankly speaking I don't really like it very much. Did anyone choose / tested this way of approaching nofap?
Yesterday evening was a really close call, I was on the verge of a relapse. I couldn't sleep (I think I fell asleep at around 2.30 am) even though my body was exhausted, my mind was racing and I ended up fishing and even watching some p-subs on Youtube. I honestly don't know how I managed to steer away from a complete relapse, just pure mental willpower I guess. I think that watching p-subs is like a partial relapse but the "progress over perfection" motto motivates me to keep the counter and continue to accumulate days here. To my understanding, p-subs are technically allowed in this challenge even though it's clear that one shouldn't feed the addiction with such garbage.
Today, however, has been very calm. No fishing, no triggers online, and I feel much more peaceful and have less urges even though I'm very sleep deprived. Strange, but I'll enjoy it while it lasts.
The wound is only existing in your perception of self and meditation does change self perception in the long run. Very drastically. That is only if you want to now the truth. Meditation is a real equivalent of the 'Matrix's red pill'
But some people prefer to forget ever knowing the truth...
Now, @Slider8 you gave food for thought. So ignoring the incorrect perception repeatedly will heal it. It's similar to EMDR psychology. Gotta trust you on this one, Morpheus. It makes sense.
But the question lingers: Why do some people still relapse after really long streaks? Since I believe the urges come from the inner child. Perhaps those guys didn't practise meditation. They just had REALLY strong willpower and artificially blocked all the triggers in their homes.
Day 1 - Ork
Being ill made me forget that I passed the bridge of Khazad Dûm yesterday, and I’ve had a lot of things line up in my life that have pointed me to move on in new strength.
I can only grow when I let go of the hold my old life has on me; I’m no longer a PMO-user, a naïve boyfriend, or a complacent worker. I must be ambitious, not power-hungry, and be willing to make hard decisions - many of the moments that have led me to realise this mean I have to turn over a new leaf tomorrow.
Feeling much better today, and excited to get back to work tomorrow in full health and strength!
This week has been the toughest for me, and I feel like the next one will be equally challenging - specially in regard to picking up the slack. With what's going on in the world which kinda is so close to home... I've been feeling so unmotivated, and the urges to relapse are very strong, pretty much decided to give myself a break and doing the bare minimum (such as working).
University starts next week as well. I've been expecting a big challenge for a while now and I think this one is it. Whatever happens, regardless of achieving my weekly goals or not, I mustn't relapse but instead face the disappointment directly and be better. It will be hard, but it will be worth it, this is why I'm here for.
I hope everyone's safe, everyone's doing well.