The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Checking in day 145.

 

I should come more often to the forum but less long.
Half and hour to 1 hour every day for recovery and self reflection ... sounds good to me. I need it and it should be managable.

I realized:
Relapses are not isolated events when they occur very frequent. I think my mind is just too full of porn, too porn-friendly, I'm too close to porn and MO habits. To get some days between me and these habits I need much effort. Reject those thoughts and urges! Before I can think of being in peace and surfing with those urges until they ebb away, I need at first a solid basis. I can't pretend, I can't be ignorant. I need to change my thinking from actively inviting porn fantasies to actively reject porn, reject this f'cked-up addiction and reject a sedetary lifestyle.

This goes along with push myself to do more and strive for meaningful stuff. But I need to build a lot of structure before I can just go after my goals. I mean, there's a lot of work to do regarding time management and self care in general.

 

Day 17, big urges in the morning but they faded quite easily

 

Day 417

 

Day 29

Another day down. I was listening to a guy talk about dating today and it made me kinda uneasy. It's a fear I'll have to face eventually for sure. I will get some dishes done before bed.

 

@kaerhal I appreciate your advice. I've been doing well for the past two days and my streak is currently at 5 days, so I'm going to keep this one running. If anything similar happens again it will be a reset.

Day 5 complete! One of my best friends with whom I hadn't spoken in a couple months called me tonight and we talked for about two hours. I was really glad to hear from him but it means my night is almost over, so not a long post from me tonight. I'm hanging in there!

@Cartographer Good to see you back and to know you're doing well. Keep up the good work!

St. Therese of Lisieux, pray for us!

 

Day 2.

A lot of wise thoughts. The basis of recovery is the change of life philosophy and the change of the direction of one's interests and sources of pleasure.

 

Checking in day 76!

 

Almost weekend! Love spending time with my gf and really bonding with her.

Last night was good, some temptations but said no in the end.

Going to start reading LotR in bed from now on! might also give LotR online game a shot again. Any1 playing here??


Day 3 - Orc, The Dark Tower Barad-Dûr

 

Day 3!

 

For those who struggle with an urge I found a technique that might help and proves successful. It works for me:

Touch your heart with you right fist and say to yourself: "I don't do that anymore. What else can I do instead?"

 

Day 3

I feel like change has come to my life.
I’m having crazy urges, but after long and hard talks both with my girlfriend, and with my therapist I feel somewhat different about porn.
I’m not going to say something silly like “I would never fall” but I can say that I feel kind of different.

The ability to get into the “Success Stories” form and get inspired or getting into the “Problematic Sexual Behavior” and get a good view of the far can we all fall and that there is no rock bottom is really useful to me.

@icebreaker p welcome back brother

 

I have completed 50 days. But it is not the achievement that I have dreamt of.

I have spent the 50 days well. Those days were so tough for me. I was so depressed, broken and sad. But I kept going and was able to overcome my failure.

But today I have watched many semi naked photos willingly for hours. But I did neither masturbate nor watch porn or nude photos or videos. Since I was able to restrict my mind from entering porn websites, I am taking this day as a victory because that will help me to boost my confidence and regain the status quo.

My mistakes were -
1) Loneliness
2) Breaking the Grind challenge ( having romantic or sexual thoughts)
3) Giving priority to curiosity
4) Not taking enough rest or break.

I know those pictures will affect my brain in the same way that porn does. But I will still be moving and getting stronger day by day.

 

Smart move! Good luck! Keep up the good work.

 

on day 9 currently.Tomorrow will be special.

 

Day 410 no PMO. Today is our last day of vacation. Head home tomorrow. Have a great weekend everyone.

 

Day 9 check in. Hey @RiseToGreatness can u update my tag? Im an Uruk – Hai now! I didn't have time to check in yesterday, so I'm here today.

I feel some urges right now. I'm having a hard time with sexual thoughts. However, In something about 2 hours from now I have to go to the university to take a test, so I won't relapse. If after the test I still feel the urges, I'll stay on the university to study there. I'm living alone, so it's kinda hard to resist when the urges come. I think the best thing I do right now on the first days of my recovery is to get out of my apartment to resist the urge. I won't fail.

 

Dawn of the 21st day!

 

Day checking in:
Feeling better and motivated , now i have to control the urges at night and everything will be ok.

 

Check in day 193