The Most Important New Years Resolution I've Ever Made

Thanks, I'm used to going every single day so when I didn't go for a few weeks, I felt like I was wasting my life. We both made a new years resolution - and intend to make it through 2016 without PMO - I look forward to seeing you there at the finish line with me!

 

I appreciate you sharing. However, I strongly feel that by improving your life, you will naturally remove PMO from your life. Concentrating on the reboot is important in the beginning when you're educating yourself, but can be counter-productive once you have a long streak going. The best way to improve your life is to work towards some sort of goal every single day. By exercising, dating women (or men), socializing, reading, writing, and working towards everything you've ever wanted - you'll be doing two things that will HELP your recovery.

1) You'll be leading a more fulfilling life and there will be more on the line - more that you'd be losing - if you go back to PMO. If you have a shitty life with PMO and a shitty life without PMO, there's not much at stake for returning to PMO. But if you've had the best life you've had your whole life - then there's a lot at stake for returning to PMO. This can be motivating.
2) You'll be distracting yourself from PMO. I would hope that most of your goals are time consuming and require some sort of daily effort. Well, that's time in your day that's being filled by doing something meaningful and not called PMO. Less time to PMO in the day, less likely it is to relapse.

I plead that you read this article and consider rethinking your strategy:
http://www.yourbrainrebalanced.com/index.php?topic=15558.0

 

Attaboy ;-)

Just to clarify, you should concentrate on your reboot the first few weeks. Saturate your brain with knowledge about PMO. Embrace the challenge and make it your #1 priority at first. But then, when you feel well educated and well learned, focus on improving your life. Work towards all your goals. Make that your priority.

I wish you luck - and I look forward to hearing your progress. If you make a journal, tag me in it! I'd be interested in following it.

 

Part 4a: My Personal Emergency Tools​

• If fighting an urge, read this article. If you still want to PMO after reading, be my guest...
• Video: "Why the People of NoFap are Successful"
• Watch a grasshopper eat a bug -> Lose your erection
• Words of wisdom from the legendary @aron
• Words of wisdom from the legendary @William
• Another encouraging post by the legendary "William"
• A TedTalk about "Emotional Hygiene"
• This scene from Lost
• A response to a Fapstronaut who wants to cheat on his gf
• And of course: The Famous Emergency Tool

Part 4b: My Personal Motivational/Educational Tools​

• The most fundamentally important article
• A similar post by the same guy^^
• A super helpful post by @SnowWhite
• An article about forming habits instead of goals
• Words of wisdom from the legendary @aron
• Words of wisdom from the legendary @William
• Another encouraging post by the legendary "William"
• The most important question to ask ourselves
• No Arousal Method
• Recovery Nation --> will be using this daily to combat my 40 day slump.

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Obviously there is so much content on the internet and this forum alone that could be added here. This is the tip of the iceberg. But now that I have a specific location to enter it, it'll be better organized.

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This is part 4 of 6. I intend to post the 6 parts on my journal and then put them all together in one post. Here's what I will post in the next 2 days along with my regular journal entries:

1. 
   
   
   • A complete list of reasons why I quit porn
   • An honest list of reasons why I want to watch porn
   • A complete list of goals I wish to accomplish by May 2016
   • A compiled list of:
     1. My personal emergency tools (the best articles/videos to read when fighting urges)
     2. My personal collaboration of the best sources for educating me (and to recommend others)
   • A precise plan how to combat the 40 day slump - what I will force myself to do everyday? I will rely on habit not willpower.
   • A complete list of triggers and a SPECIFIC way of combating of every one of them.

 

My 12th Day

Today was great - I worked hard on my most recent post. I volunteered. I pushed myself in the gym. I just socialized with some good friends. I did a few minor tasks that I had been wanting to complete.

I feel so productive with this 6-part post I'm working on. I'm almost going to be disappointed when I finish - maybe I can add more parts. Today went very smoothly, and I feel happy. When I'm productive, I feel fulfilled. And the happiness that comes from fulfillment is worth so much. By feeling fulfilled, I canfeel happy about my day opposed to postponing my happiness.

For example, let's say I want to make 1 Million dollars really badly. This is my one true ambition. The only goal of my life. "When I make a million, then I'll be so happy." With this attitude, I might feel happy when I accomplish tasks towards the goal of making a million, but what I'm doing is poisoning my chances of being happy everyday. I'm postponing my happiness.

By accomplishing small and large goals everyday, I feel happy. This might be correlated to my absence of porn, but the last few days I've felt satisfied, fulfilled, and HAPPY. I'm proud of myself for accomplishing the small goals I laid before me. Guys, I feel that this is the secret to life!

I'm pumped. Life is awesome.

 

Yes! Couldn't have said it better

 

My 13th Day

Felt a bit down today, something of a slump. No particular reason, just an intense lonely/boredom. I started reading The Slight Edge and I love it already. I'm excited thinking about it. I watched a movie that had a little bit of nudity (that I wasn't expecting) and I wasn't really sure what to do.

I realized I haven't really come up with a plan for what to do when I come along non-intentional porn substitutes. What I should have done was cover the screen with my hand, but I didn't want to do that. I was curious if this particular actress would go nude, and I was curious to see. After I saw, I didn't crave more, but wasn't sure if I should have acted different. For all I know, seeing that bit of nudity caused my small slump today.

So I was thinking... should I completely cut out movies that are rated R (or rather, state that there is nudity in the rating)?? I've become a huge movie person in the last year or two and really love watching movies, so I would absolutely dread cutting this out of my life. Any thoughts?

 

I posted a thread discussing this issue of nudity in movies, and I've decided that I will not watch anything that has nudity in it. I also will not watch TV shows with nudity in it. There are so many movies, I can live without a small selection of them that have nudity. Because I can truly accept that watching them does me no good. I don't think I internalized that the last few times I tried NoFap - I didn't accept that porn substitutes were just as bad, if not worse than porn because you're only fooling yourself.

So I figure, the only exception to this decision, is if I want to watch a movie with a friend and my friend really wants to watch a particular movie (that has nudity). Then, (and this will be difficult) I will look away when there is any nudity. I have to be honest though, I don't feel like I will actually do that - I don't feel by saying "I will look away" that I am being honest. I feel it's something I want the people of this forum to hear me say, but not something that I will truly do. With this realization, perhaps I shouldn't even allow myself to watch movies with nudity even if a friend is suggesting it. Hmmm I have some pondering to do.... For now I will avoid nudity at all costs, until I can honestly say to myself that I will look away.

@Gaston I did not know there was an egyptian god named Seth (Set). My name was merely a suggestion from a friend of my mothers. She fell in love with it, and hence came "Seth".

 

My 15th Day

I don't know what's been going on, but I've lost a lot of motivation to do nearly everything. I have a super important interview coming up in 10 days and I haven't been doing anything to prepare even though I really need to. Procrastinating like this is something I haven't done since college (~ 6 months ago). I still have two posts left to write about my self improvement, but I don't even want to push myself to do that...

I keep feeling motivated in the morning, but after I do my daily swim, all I want to do is watch TV and read.

 

To compound that, I just got rejected from a school I had high hopes for. This is a really uncomfortable emotion, but I'm going to fucking deal with it like a man...

I hate that expression, but it feels appropriate.