Trying to start NoFap again!

I almost experienced it - and the way you describe it is correct. I really miss the lust thing. I really enjoyed that and now I cannot experience that anymore – at least not very much. Of course I'm afraid that the lust will not be there when I'm with a real woman. Combined with those other issues. I think that having PE and automatic expectation that having something intimate would suck does not help either – and seeing that it costs me so much trouble and energy and trouble to approach a girl – I don’t think the reward of doing so is worth it. Even if a girl approaches me or dances against my dick or something I automatically push her away because my mind goes apeshit with negative shit by then. even if I know for sure she likes me I littarly close off. My mind always find something negative automatically without my consent and I'm taken over by it completely.

That’s why enjoyed those amp’s so much because it felt that being with a woman with that would be sensational and I would not be taken over by those negative thoughts.

 

I think you should really be blessed with that to be honest. If could have given half of your libido to me I would be extremely happy. I only seem to have that on high doses of ampetamines - and even then it is not a gaurantee.

 

Thank you that is very kind and I hope I get that back as well! Too bad life seems to think differently about that or at least for some time now.

Still the urges to seek woman are incredibly high. I just want to everything just to see beautiful woman. It even motivates to exercise so that I can see woman. My mind is pretty crazy. But most of the times I see them it is not as great as I hoped. This also counts for the past when girls were in my bedroom. Sometimes if I see the girl I would think it would be wonderful to do something with her – and then you get her and it sux. Leaving me extremely disappointed. Also is was always very jealous that my mates could enjoy kissing or doing sexual stuff with random girls that were average at best.

 

I don't think that, that will work. I'm pretty sure I will feel even worse if I don't enjoy it that much again. I rather do only kissing and cuddling - that way I'm don't cum and feel empty afterwards.

 

Don't worry about it - I did not take it that way. Maybe I should get some pussy - but I'm too afraid it would suck again and that I will be disappointed again. It happens always when I use the Fleshlight, the sensations should almost be the same but I don't feel much pleasure from it. I don't feel much in my whole shaft and on the top I do feel something but it is not nessary pleasurable. It does not feel bad but not great either. Unless I take those amphs then I really feel on the whole penis and get a a milking feeling and then it feels great. Sober not so much.

 

Don't worry about it and don't delete your account. Like I said I didn't take it that way.